


The Unexpected Visitor

by alisha_winchester_collins



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Everybody Lives, F/M, Sirius Black Lives, hints of depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-05
Updated: 2015-11-18
Packaged: 2018-04-13 04:16:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 75,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4507440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alisha_winchester_collins/pseuds/alisha_winchester_collins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summer 1995: “Sirius Black, who once did the impossible when he broke out of the Wizarding prison Azkaban, has now found himself a prisoner in his own house. Used for the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix, number 12 Grimmauld Place is the last place Sirius thought he would return to… and though he is doing everything out of duty, Sirius has no idea just how much his life is about to change.</p>
<p>The arrival of a strange and unexpected guest makes things more complicated than anything… a girl who only goes by the name Rose has found herself in Sirius’s house and his life. There may be a mystery behind who she is and where she is from, but neither one of them are able to predict just how much of an impact they will have on each other. However, they soon discover that their lives are intertwined together. Forever.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

"Are you sure about this Albus?" Minerva McGonagall stood just in front of the Headmaster's desk, arms folded across her chest as she looked Albus Dumbledore in the eye, feeling a slight sense of deja vu; she remembered being just as worried about the decision they'd made fifteen years ago when they'd left Harry Potter on the doorstep of the Dursley's home.

"I believe that the Order will be able to protect her." Dumbledore replied, knowing that Minerva was right to have her doubts about this decision, but there was nothing else that they could do.

"Yes, you are right about that." McGonagall said softly, as she thought about what they were planning. "I just hope that this is the right thing to do… we both know how  _he_  has been ever since… going back. And he doesn't even know what has happened yet."

"I trust you will be able to explain everything to him, Minerva." The tone of Dumbledore's voice was calm as he spoke, "And we have to believe that he will do the right thing. If not for her sake then perhaps he will do it for the woman he once loved."

"What of her family?" She couldn't help but ask.

"There is no one left. Voldemort has seen to that… she is the last of her name." Dumbledore said grimly, these were dark times they were living in once more and the only thing they could do was to lay low until the time was right.

"But… surely… her uncle…" Minerva started to say and then stopped herself when she realized that it was of no use.

"He does not know of her existence and that is how it should be; it would be dangerous to try and expose him to any danger, given his current situation, I fear that he would not be able to help."

"Very well Albus, I will take her there myself." Knowing that this matter had been sorted out, there was little else to discuss.

"I am glad to hear that." Dumbledore said to McGonagall, "She is with Hagrid now."

Having received her orders, Minerva swiftly left Dumbledore's office as she bade him goodnight and made her way to Hagrid's hut located on the boundary of the school. Her fears had been justified given everything that had happened this summer with the Triwizard Tournament; the grounds were protected with extra charms and security measures, but there was every chance of spies lurking in the shadows, the sooner McGonagall took the girl to safety, the better it would be. When she reached her destination and knocked, Hagrid appeared almost immediately when he opened the door.

"Professor McGonagall ma'am." Hagrid greeted her with a smile as he stepped aside to let her in.

"Hagrid, how is she doing?" She asked, glancing around the house and found who she was looking for asleep on the couch there.

"Jus' fine." He said, and then noticed that McGonagall was dressed for traveling, "Is it time already?"

"Yes." Minerva stated simply, "Professor Dumbledore's orders."

"O'course. I'll jus' say… goodbye ter her… now." Hagrid had known that this arrangement was only temporary but he had grown attached to the girl in the few days she'd been here. "Where is she goin' to go?" He asked.

"I'm here to take her to Grimmauld Place. She's going to be living with Sirius Black." McGongall said.


	2. Chapter 1

The streets of Grimmauld Place, Islington, London, were always deserted at night. No one who lived there seemed to venture outdoors; most of the houses from Number 1 to Number 15 did have signs of life - music blasting through stereos, television sets playing in the background as families sat down to dinner, animated conversations heard from the telephones - yes, all 14 buildings seemed to be quite normal every day and every night... until one summer night in August when everything changed. Life for all the people who lived on this street was very routine, boring and monotonous, that nobody had realized there was no Number 12 on their block. Anyone who walked up and down would notice Number 11 and Number 13 right beside it; they had long since accepted that there’d been a mistake in the numbering, never once thinking of any other possibility. They were quite wrong in that sense; a Number 12 _did_ exist, it was merely hidden in plain sight and would remain unknown and invisible to everyone who did not know how to find the house. However, for the second time that summer of ‘95, Number 12 Grimmauld Place came into view.

Night had fallen many hours ago, the street was empty and eerily still, no breeze blowing the leaves on the trees, no cars honking their horns, no crickets chirping, no noise from anywhere around the area... and in the midst of the pavement, which had been wet with rain that afternoon, there stood a tiny figure all alone. A young girl who was but a child, with only a backpack slung over her shoulders, glanced at the identical doors of Number 11 and 13; she held a slip of paper in her hands and looked down at the words written there, remembering what she had been told to do.

"Number... Number Twelve." Her voice was but a whisper as she closed her eyes and thought of a big house with 1 & 2 written on a sign.

And almost as if it were magic, the little girl suddenly felt the stones underneath her feet start to shake; she opened her eyes and stared in wonder as the buildings seemed to move away from each other, letting a new one appear in the middle of them. Once the ground had settled again, the girl saw a set of steps in front of her and a plain, battered black door with a silver knocker shaped like a serpent.

"Knock one time and wait." Repeating the instructions that she had been given, the girl made her way up and found that she was just tall enough to reach out and lift the ring to knock on the door once.

After that, it was only a matter of seconds before something happened; there was no noise from outside where she stood, but if she leaned in closer to the door, there definitely was a sign that she was not completely alone in a strange place anymore.

"Hello?" A woman's voice called out as soon as the door creaked open, her hair was flaming red and she looked very kind.

“Hello.” Looking up to see the lady standing there, the girl smiled; she had been told there was a chance of meeting this woman and seeing her meant that she was at the right place.

“Oh! Goodness me, I almost didn’t see you there dear.” Molly Weasley was surprised to see such a young child standing outside at this late hour, she hadn’t expected anyone to show up, certainly not someone so small. “What are you doing here?” It occurred to her that since no one could find this house unless they were told, whoever the girl was, didn’t stumble upon it accidentally.

“Miss Minnie brought me here.” The girl replied, reaching into the pocket of her jacket and took out an envelope.

Molly took the letter in her hands and when she saw the familiar Hogwarts crest on the seal, she realized that this was very important. Even more so once she noticed whom this was addressed to; the handwriting belonged to Minerva McGonagall and if she had personally brought this child here to the house then things had to be serious.

“Come in child, come in!” Whatever was going on, Molly’s first priority went to the little girl as she ushered her inside the house. “Just stay close to me and don’t make a noise, okay dear? We don’t want to wake anything up.” She said in a soft whisper as she closed the door behind them.

“Okay.” Still holding onto her backpack, the girl followed Molly through a dimly lit corridor; everything smelled a little damp and dusty, but still felt homely in a way too.

In a few short moments, Molly had led the girl inside the house which would have appeared uninhabited if it weren’t for the hushed whispers that could be heard all around; for someone who was so young and practically a stranger, the girl seemed unfazed by everything she was experiencing, although she did stop and stare at the serpent-shaped chandeliers for a second longer. When they finally reached the kitchen, the little girl suddenly moved closer to stand beside Molly, seeing _everyone_ present there pause their conversations as they stared at her.

From the famous boy-wizard Harry Potter to his friends Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley and all the other redhead siblings, as well as the adults - Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody, Arthur Weasley and Kingsley Shacklebolt - to say that they were taken aback by the sudden appearance of a child in this house was an understatement; but Molly knew that the girl was probably scared of all the attention and she’d only just arrived.

“Everyone, I’d like to you meet…” Molly began to say when she realized that the girl hadn’t said her name all this while.

“I’m Rose.” She finally spoke up softly, still holding onto the older woman’s robes.  

“Hello there.” Lupin was the first to get over his surprise of seeing their new guest as he walked over to where she stood, “It’s nice to meet you Rose.” He smiled and held out his hand to her.

“Hi.” Rose sensed that this man was friendly and slowly reached for his hand to shake it. “Who are you?” She asked him quite bluntly but her tone was more curious than anything else. She didn’t seem very frightened now.

Hearing her innocent question, Lupin chuckled and noticed that everyone else was trying to hide their smiles as well.

“My name is Remus Lupin.” He answered, hoping to see the others come forward and help Rose feel more comfortable; whoever she was, she seemed all alone. “Why don’t I introduce you to the rest of our group?” Lupin could see that Molly was holding an envelope in her hand and knew they would have to discuss this matter soon.

“Okay…” Nodding to him in reply, Rose took his outstretched hand as he led her to meet the others.

It took only a few minutes and once the introductions were over, having been handed the letter by Molly, Lupin excused himself from the table as he went to read it in private. Whatever was happening, the fact that a letter had his name on it meant things were serious. In the meantime, Molly had made Rose settle down in the dining room while the others decided to give her some space as they all tried to figure out who this new mystery guest was. And why she had arrived here at the Headquarters of the Order.  

“Are you hungry dear? You must have something to eat!” Molly had only one thing she needed to worry about, making sure that this child was comfortable until she was told otherwise.

“I’m not hungry. I ate dinner at the school.” Rose smiled as she answered Molly politely, “Thank you.” She added almost immediately, not forgetting her manners.

“Well, that’s good to know… have you been staying at Hogwarts for long dear?” She asked, hoping to find some answers which would help them be able to help her..

There was no chance for Rose to reply back for Lupin returned almost immediately, looking worried about something. Whatever he had read in the letter had troubled him; after whispering something to Kingsley and Moody, Lupin went over to Arthur. Everything else that happened next took place in a matter of several seconds, it was almost impossible to gauge what the seriousness was all about. As soon as Molly was informed of the situation, things changed very quickly.

“Goodness me! Look at the time!” Molly exclaimed as she jumped up from the chair, “Rose, you must be tired after the long trip, why don’t we get you to bed?” She ushered the girl to her feet and went over to Hermione and Ginny who were quietly watching everything play out. Harry, Ron and the twins were beside them and very confused.

“Mum? What is it?” Ron asked her, it was no secret that something had happened for all of the adults to suddenly gather around the table as they started to talk in hushed voices.

“Nothing, nothing at all Ron. Don’t you worry, this is just Order business.” Her voice sounded different to them but Molly couldn’t say anything else yet. “Come on now, it’s bed time for you lot! Fred, George, off you go.”

“But… what about dessert…?” George spoke up, knowing all too well that his mother was trying to send them away from an important discussion.

“Tomorrow night.” Was all Molly said to him before turning to Hermione again, “Girls, would you please show Rose to her bedroom for the night?” Her hands rested on Rose’s shoulders as she spoke. “Remus said that there’s a spare bed made up already in your room.”

“Mrs. Weasley...” Harry started to say but Fred nudged him in the ribs.

“C’mon Harry, let’s go. We know when we’re not wanted.” Fred made a point of talking loud enough for the whole floor to hear his voice.

In the midst of all this, Rose stood where she was, by the foot of the staircase; she had absolutely no idea what was going on but when she turned around to look back to where Lupin was seated, there was a name which he spoke of that she didn’t recognize… but clearly the person did not seem to be sitting at the table with the others. The next thing Rose knew, the girl called Hermione who didn’t have red hair but rather brown hair like hers, held out a hand for her to take and they were all headed up the big staircase within moments.

“Oi, Fred! D’you still have the Extendable Ears on you?” George asked his twin once they’d all reached the second floor landing.

“Course I do George. Brilliant idea!” Fred grinned as he slid out a whole string of… ears… hanging by a thread; Rose could only stare in silence as she watched the five teenagers, minus Hermione, picked one up and listened in to the conversation that was going on downstairs.

“Blimey! This is serious, I can barely hear anything.” Ron exclaimed in surprise, “They’ve never done that before.”

“Clearly we’re _not_ supposed to be listening to any of it.” Hermione sounded disappointed, “They must have added extra enchantments to the room so that even an Extendable Ear wouldn’t be able to listen in.”  

“Ssssh… I think I hear something.” Both Fred and George spoke in unison as they leaned over the banister, their eyes going wide as they caught snippets of someone talking.

“He’s definitely angry about something, Mad-Eye.” Ginny suddenly piped up, realizing that the magic wasn’t enough to keep his loud voice down.

_“Dead?”... How is this possible?”... “Sirius?”... “But what does it mean?”... “Sirius doesn’t know”... “And the girl?”... “Is she really…?” “Sirius has to...?”_

“What? What is it?” Ron poked one of his brother’s shoulders, before turning to see Ginny looking at Rose; she also heard what Fred and George had.

And in the moment of silence, they all noticed that Rose was holding on to the last Extendable Ear that Hermione chose not to use. The six of them - Harry, Ron, Fred, George, Ginny and Hermione had only just met this girl, but even though they didn’t know Rose at all, there was one thing they could agree on without needing to say the words… no one should have had to hear that. Whatever it was.

“Rose…” Hermione decided to speak up, “Are you okay?” She asked the girl, knowing that she was probably scared.

“Yes, I… I’m just sleepy now.” Rose showed no signs of being affected by the words, but could see that all of these new people were watching her carefully, and they looked worried.

“We should go to bed.” Ginny said, “Mum was right, it’s getting late and we all have to wake up early again.” It was obviously worrying for her to have listened to those bits and pieces of the talk, and maybe she wanted to talk to Hermione about it in private, without her brothers and Harry around.

“Yeah, we should sleep too.” Fred agreed with his little sister and started to tug on Ron’s t-shirt, “Let’s go _Ronald_.” He stressed on his full name as he and George bowed to the girls dramatically.

None of them understood what they’d heard but there was no point in trying to ask questions at that moment, not when they were supposed to have been in bed by now. Harry sighed as he rubbed his scar, while Rose looked on curiously as she had when she first met him, but never asked him about it. She knew it was rude to stare and when Harry caught her, she quickly averted her gaze, feeling her cheeks turning red. There was not much to say to any of them as they all mumbled goodnight to one another and went their separate ways; leaving Hermione and Ginny to walk to their room with Rose tagging along behind.

“Here we are Rose, you can sleep with us tonight.” Hermione said when she closed the bedroom door behind her, “Do you want to pick where you would like to sleep? She asked, gesturing to all three of the beds set up for them.

“Umm… I like to sleep near the door.” Was all Rose said in reply, looking up to Hermione and seeing her smile.

“Okay. Ginny and I will be right here if you need us.” She told the little girl; that was the spare bed which someone had already made up, which meant that she and Ginny didn’t need to move their stuff.

“Thank you.” Rose said as she let go of the backpack, sitting down on the bed and taking a moment.

The room was big, at least in her eyes, considering that there were 3 beds fitted quite comfortably, with enough space for them to move around as well. Rose watched quietly as the other two girls started to get ready for bed and decided she needed to the same; traveling from the school till here, even by magic was tiring and though she was still a little hesitant about this new house, it felt good to know that Hermione and Ginny were there. Her backpack, which had been modified by Professor McGonagall, held quite a few of her clothes among other personal things she didn’t want to leave behind; most of her other stuff would reach the house in a day or two, but Rose had all she needed for now. It didn’t take her more than a few minutes to change into her night clothes and tucked herself into bed.

“Goodnight Rose.” Ginny said first as she turned off her light. “Goodnight Hermione.”

“Goodnight Ginny, goodnight Rose.” Hermione said and turned the light off on her side as well.

“Goodnight.” Rose said to both of them; the room had fallen into darkness now and she let out a soft sigh, staring up at the ceiling above.

It wasn’t enchanted by magic like the ceiling at Hogwarts, in the Great Hall, but Rose knew that was a special thing which did not happen everywhere. A part of her missed the school already, another missed her own home, and yet, the one thing that Rose couldn’t get out of her mind was what she had heard through the Extendable Ears; all of the adults knew about her by now and the story behind her appearance here at Grimmauld Place, but they seemed to be nice and concerned about her so maybe there was no need to feel scared. The thoughts floated in and out of her mind as Rose closed her eyes at last, wishing that perhaps tonight she would be able to sleep peacefully.


	3. Chapter 2

Rose sighed deeply as she tossed around in her new bed, not everything was making sense to her, but if the Headmaster had said she must stay here then... she would. Still, it didn’t help her situation that this room was so _different_ from her old bedroom. Rubbing her eyes, Rose sat up and threw the covers off her, there was no way she would get sleep if she was so restless… but what was there for her to do? Hermione and Ginny were fast asleep and she didn’t dare to wake them up, no need to bother them with her inability to sleep. The sounds seemed to have stopped for the night which meant that everyone else had probably gone to bed for the night as well. Climbing down from her bed, Rose walked quietly across the room to the door, standing on her toes to turn the knob open as it swung without any noise.

Peeking out just a little, she scanned the entire corridor and saw that it was empty… and dark. Carefully turning around to check that both the girls were still sleeping, Rose made her way outside and stepped onto the landing, thankful that it was carpeted all along the corridor. There was no need for her to be wandering about aimlessly so late at night in a strange, scary house; if she wanted, Rose simply had to go  back inside and jump into bed, hoping that her exhaustion would put her to sleep. And yet, there was something which had aroused her curiosity, which had been on her mind for quite sometime now.

“S… Si… Sir…ius... Sirius…” She whispered the name out loud, remembering it with ease since she’d heard it no less than half dozen times that night.

Who was this person that everyone talked about? Sirius. Rose hadn’t met anyone among the adults by that name; and if she thought for a moment longer, she realized that she’d heard the same person’s name back at the school as well. So where was he? The eeriness all around didn’t bother Rose as she decided to head for the stairs, up to the third floor. Her feet were so tiny and light that even though there may have been a few loose, creaky floorboards, she didn’t make a noise. Climbing slowly, it took several long minutes during which there was no disturbance when she passed the other bedrooms.

“Now what do I do?” Rose said aloud once she’d reached her destination; there was another floor above this, but first she wanted to check this corridor.

As far as she could tell, there were only two bedrooms here and they both seemed to be unoccupied, which wasn’t helpful at all. Just when Rose decided that maybe the upper floor would prove to turn up something, she heard a noise. Frozen in her tracks, she shivered when she listened to the sound once more; it was a thumping of sorts, and the source of this strange noise seemed to be coming from one of the rooms. Now Rose was not a child who got scared by many things, but this being her first night in a new house, maybe it was normal for her to be a little frightened.

"It's okay... I’m not scared." Taking a deep breath, Rose figured that there was no harm in taking a look inside the room and see what had caused the noise.

She walked across the carpeted floor as quietly as she could, very much relieved that no matter how ancient this house seemed, Rose was able to walk up to the bedroom at the far end of the corridor with ease and paused for a second, wondering if she should knock first? Before any decision could be made, she heard that noise again - *THUMP* *THUMP* - and Rose almost backtracked towards her own room. Once again, there was a second, different sound that reached her ears… almost animal-like. That was all she needed to know that her curiosity would get the best of her and the next thing she knew, Rose had turned the door handle open and stepped inside.

Not knowing what she hoped to find behind the door, Rose wasn’t entirely surprised when she saw that the room was bathed in darkness… the only light which filled the room came from a small lantern which hung at the far end. She had barely set foot across the threshold when she sensed something watching her. Looking up, Rose could see a big, very big bulky form of a creature that appeared to be fast asleep. And beside it, was a large shaggy black dog with gleaming wide eyes that stood up almost as soon as Rose met its gaze.

“Doggy!” Rose couldn’t help herself from exclaiming a little too loudly when she saw it standing there, not more than a few feet away.

There was nothing more she loved than dogs, no matter how big or small they may be and though she never had had a dog herself, Rose didn’t feel afraid anymore and took a step forward to get closer to this dog. She didn’t realize that he was watching her carefully, his head slightly tilted to the side; but when she was face to face with him at last, the moment her hand touched his cheek and rubbed the soft fur, the dog let out a small whine as it nuzzled her, making Rose giggle.

“Do you like that?” Moving her hand towards his ears, Rose gave him a scratch behind one before doing the same to the other ear.

He did seem to like her attention, for Rose could feel his nose touching her arm and just then, she felt all her worries and fears fade away. Her moment of wonder at finding a dog that clearly lived in this house was turned into surprise when Rose suddenly felt him turn away from her; and before she could guess what had happened, she saw the dog transform within seconds, into a man. If she hadn’t already seen something similar happening before, back at the school with Professor McGonagall, she may have been shocked or even confused, but this was quite normal for her to witness.

The man that now stood there in place of the dog was tall, with long dark hair and unshaven too. Rose could also see the striking grey eyes that stared at her, almost as if in shock; when he suddenly knelt down to her level, Rose also saw something else in his eyes. If she didn’t know any better, she would have said that… he looked… sad.

“ _Marlene_?” It was spoken so softly, not even a whisper but like a gasp of breath that Rose wouldn’t have even heard it if she didn’t see the man’s lips moving.

“Hello.” She said to him, wondering if this was whom she had been looking for.

And when he heard her speak, he seemed to snap out of his trance-like state and saw that there was a little girl whom he was talking to. Someone he didn’t know and yet was in his house?

“Hello there love.” His voice was much more loud now, all the traces of sadness suddenly vanished and he was holding a hand out for Rose to shake.

“Hello.” Rose said again, taking his hand and shaking it; the change in his demeanor was not lost on her but she didn’t say anything to him.

“May I ask your name?” There was no signs of a smile on his face, but he didn’t seem angry either.

“I’m Rose.” She answered him softly, wondering why he seemed so different from all the other adults she had met in the house earlier.

The man paused for a second when he heard the name; he remembered how once, a long time ago, had a best friend with a flower for a name. This was a little girl also named after a flower.

“That’s a lovely name Rose.” The man said, as he let go of her hand, but now she saw him watching her, as if… he knew her… which was impossible of course. She had heard him say another name before, but didn’t understand why.

“Thank you.” Unsure of what else to say, Rose simply smiled at that compliment. She had always liked her name and he seemed sincere in his words.

“Sirius Black at your service.” He finally introduced himself.

“I know.” Rose blurted out loud before she could stop to think and then speak.

“You do? Well now, that’s something I don’t hear everyday.” There was a hint of sarcasm in his voice, but Sirius brushed it aside, still trying to process the fact that the girl in front of him seemed very much real.

“The others… they were… they were talking about you… downstairs.” She admitted sheepishly, not breaking away from his gaze.

“Ah. I see. They do little else.” He paused to look at this child standing in front of him, wondering who she was and why she seemed to have found herself in his house. “How old are you?” Sirius suddenly asked, confusing Rose a little with his abrupt change in topic.

Rose held up her right hand with four fingers as she spoke, “Four years old.” She said to him happily.

“Four? My, aren’t you a big girl already.” Her age wasn’t surprising, but the fact that she seemed so wise at 4 did peak Sirius’s curiosity, “So… tell me love, what brings you here to my house?”

“Miss Minnie brought me here.” Rose repeated her answer to him just as she had said to Molly. “From the school.”

“Minerva? You were at Hogwarts?” This was not what Sirius had expected to hear, then again, he didn’t know what explanation he had been expecting.

She could hear the shock in his voice, but didn’t know what else to tell him just yet, so she simply nodded her head in response.

“And what of your parents? Do they know where you are?” Sirius was aware that he probably would have to speak to McGonagall about this personally if there was a chance to do so. And soon.  

At this, Rose fell silent and hung her head low. No one had directly asked her this question until now, and even though she had just met him, Rose felt that she _wanted_ to tell Sirius. Before she could say anything, he seemed to have understood what her silence meant and reached forward to lift her chin up with his thumb.

“I’m sorry.” His voice was kinder now, and the grey eyes seemed sympathetic as she looked at them.

“I was at home… not… I don’t know… what happened… to my momma and daddy.” She finally said, hoping that she wasn’t about to cry.

“It’s okay, it’s alright… come here love.” Sirius could see that the girl was lost and confused and alone, everything he knew all too well himself, and without thinking, he took her in his arms and hugged her.

Rose wrapped her hands around his neck and buried her head in his jacket, feeling oddly safe. As if all this time she hadn’t truly been. It was hard to explain why she stayed there, hugging Sirius for a few more minutes before pulling back first. Somehow, there was a sense of comfort that she felt just being in his presence; though they had only met a few minutes ago.

“Thank you.” Rose said to him, a little surprised when she felt Sirius taking her hand in his as they both walked towards the back of the room to sit on the floor, leaning against the wall.

“You’re very welcome love,” Sirius said as he observed Rose to see if she was feeling better, “I’ve always found that a hug is the best thing to share when we feel sad. Don’t you think so?” He asked her.  

“I like hugs.” She replied back with a smile now, which was enough for Sirius to know that she was going to be okay.

“Now, what brings you up here so late at night?” He was sitting beside Rose and still very curious about her; the similarities that he could see between her and… Marlene… was he just imagining things?

“Err… I… well…” Rose blushed and glanced away for a moment, “I was not getting sleep.” She said and then elaborated before Sirius could ask her for details, “I… I don’t like the… dark.”

It wasn’t really something to be embarrassed about, Rose knew that, but even though she was well aware of the fact that a lot of kids her age had all sorts of things which scared them, she thought that given everything she’d gone through… maybe she would be a little more braver. And somehow, Sirius could sense what she was thinking in that moment; he reached out to gently touch her hand, waiting until Rose glanced up to meet his gaze before he spoke.

“Can I tell you a secret love?” He asked and when he saw her nod, Sirius went on, “I’m also scared of the dark too.”

“I thought grown up people don’t get scared.” Her eyes had widened in surprise when she heard his confession; Rose did believe him when he said that to her, the way he sounded and how she could see it in his grey eyes.

Sirius laughed at that. It was the first time in a very long time since he had laughed and Rose did hear how it sounded a little like a bark mixed in with his voice.

“Believe me when I tell you this, Rose… grown up people get scared of many things.” Sirius said, running a hand through his hair, “We’re just better at hiding it from others.” He admitted softly, making it seem as if he was talking to himself.

“So what do you do when you get scared of the dark?” She asked him, curious to know more.

“Well, I usually just sleep with a light on in my room.” It was the obvious solution and Sirius realized that perhaps Rose could use the same thing to help her get sleep. “Why don’t I come downstairs to your room and leave a light on for you?”

“Oh! Yes, yes… I would like that. Thank you.” Rose brightened up almost immediately at the thought of that; she had always been scared of complete darkness ever since she was a baby and knowing that Sirius was there to help made her feel glad to have met him.

“Shall we, love?” Standing up just then, Sirius held out his hand for Rose and together, they started to head outside, when Rose suddenly stopped and turned back.

“Umm… who is that?” Pointing to the big creature that she had seen on first entering the room, Rose wondered if it was too late to ask Sirius about it.

“Ah, that would be Buckbeak. He’s a Hippogriff.” Sirius said when he saw where Rose was gesturing to, the sleeping figure of his… pet. “It’s an animal like a horse and an eagle.” He explained, wondering how much Rose knew about magical creatures.

“Is he sleeping?” She asked, surprised at the size of this animal, who had not stirred once from his sleep all this while.

“Yep, Beaky a very deep sleeper. I wouldn’t be surprised if you went up to tap him and he still wouldn’t wake up.” The comment was very casual but Sirius realized he probably shouldn’t have said that, “I don’t think that would be a good idea, we should let him sleep.” He quickly added.

Rose simply nodded in agreement… there was no need to wake him up at such a late hour, but she was looking forward to meeting Beaky properly in the morning. Just as Sirius was about to open the door, someone from outside did it for him and when she saw who stood there, Rose seemed glad. Remus hadn’t left for the night and she never did get a chance to say goodnight to him.

“Sirius! There you are.” Lupin exclaimed, sounding a little out of breath but happy to have found his friend. “I wasn’t sure where you were.” He said to him, and from his manner, Sirius could tell that Lupin wanted to tell him something.

“Moony, I didn’t know you were still here.” Sirius commented on seeing him there.

“Yes yes, I just wanted to…” He started to say but then trailed off when he noticed Rose, “Oh, hello again Rose.”

“Hi.” She said softly with a smile.

“Is everything alright?” He asked his friend, knowing that Rose was still by his side.

“Umm… there was something that I wanted to discuss with you.” Lupin had something in his hands but when he saw Rose, the bundle disappeared underneath his cloak.

“Now? Can it wait until the morning? I was taking Rose back to her room; she wasn’t getting sleep.” This was hardly the time for a chat, especially since Sirius had already promised to see that Rose went to bed.

“Well… I… I suppose it could.” The nervousness in his voice was something that Sirius didn’t pick up on, but Lupin could tell that his friend was distracted, and possibly even a little drunk, which wasn’t ideal to discuss the important matter he had shown up for.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Sirius said as he shook hands with Remus to say goodbye.

“Yes, goodnight.” Lupin said to Sirius before turning to Rose, “Take care of yourself Rose.”

“Goodnight.” She replied back and waved to him.

With that, Remus headed out, leaving Sirius to take Rose back to her room at last. The hour was late and he could sense that Rose had pretty much started to fall asleep, but she still held onto his hand; within a few minutes, he had slipped inside and made sure that the other two girls were not disturbed as he tucked her in.

“Thank you.” Rose looked up to see Sirius watching her and for a moment, she thought that he reminded her of her father who always tucked her in at night before she went to bed.

“You’re welcome, get some sleep now. I will see you tomorrow morning okay?” He said and patted her head.

“Okay. Goodnight, Sirius.” She said and then yawned once before reaching for one of the pillows and hugged it tight.

“Goodnight Rose.” He whispered softly, and making good on his promise, he left a dim light on right beside her bed before closing the door behind him.

There was so much that he wanted to ask her… for someone whom he’d just met, this girl had somehow made an impression on him and he wanted to know more. The questions would have to wait until morning though, he was in no state to sit down and have a discussion with anyone about this. Sighing deeply as he leaned against the wall, Sirius decided that it was time he went to sleep as well… the silence around him meant that everyone else had slept already. As he started walking back upstairs to his room, he heard low voices coming from somewhere below and leaning over the banister, it was not surprising to see that Remus was just about to leave and he had company. From what he could make out before he saw them leaving, Sirius gathered that Remus had offered to drop Tonks off at her apartment first.

“Always the gentleman Moony.” Sirius said to himself with a grin, knowing that there was something starting to change between the two, but for now he would keep his thoughts to himself and see where things went.


	4. Chapter 3

Sunlight was streaming through the windows as Buckbeak let out a sound that seemed to be a delighted sigh; he was wide awake and feasting on his morning breakfast courtesy of Sirius who sat nearby on the table, watching the Hippogriff. Whatever hopes he had had the previous night for sleeping disappeared once he'd reached his room, but there was no point in worrying over it... this was normal for him. As long as he kept drinking and blocking those images out of his mind, everything would be okay.

"Do you think it's wise to be drinking so early in the morning?" Lupin's voice broke through Sirius's train of thoughts as he entered the room.

"Do you think it's wise to sneak up on an unsuspecting man who has a Hippogriff for a pet?" Sirius countered, choosing not to turn around and face his friend.

“Sirius… we need to talk.” The concern that Lupin had for his friend was very much founded, he knew that Sirius was having trouble sleeping and if there was anything he could to do help… even if it meant getting the other man to talk about what was troubling him.

“Yes, we do need to talk Remus.” Pouring himself another drink, Sirius raised his glass to Lupin before drowning it in one shot. “Pull up a chair, have a drink and let’s _talk_.”

“Good. I’m glad to hear that you’re willing to listen now…” Lupin managed to say as much before he was interrupted.

“Why don’t we start by talking about this secret meeting of yours last night?” The tone in Sirius’s voice was a bit sharp but given his mood, he couldn’t be bothered to sound more polite. “I heard that everyone had a jolly good time discussing _yours truly_ when I wasn’t even around.” He had stretched out his legs on the table in front of him and turned to focus his attention solely on Lupin, knowing that he could hear the anger in his voice.

“It’s not what you’re thinking of Sirius, if you’d just let me explain.” Maybe now, he would get through.

“Oh? Do enlighten me then Moony.” Sirius waved his hand in a gesture to let Lupin get on with his reasoning.

“We were talking about Rose. And the fact that she’s going to be staying here in your house for the near future.” Lupin knew exactly what was up with Sirius and his moods, he also knew that there was no need to sit down and talk about it because Sirius wouldn’t open up, so he simply spoke about what was important.

Hearing Lupin mentioning Rose did get a reaction out of Sirius, for he dropped his glass on the table and waited to hear of anything else that his friend had to say on this matter.

“What about it?” He asked Lupin, wondering what exactly the other man meant by ‘near future’.

“I was trying to tell you this last night. Something happened… and after we found out the details of it, Alastor was quite angry over the situation and went to Hogwarts to speak to Dumbledore today morning.”

“Mad-Eye’s at Hogwarts? Why… what do you mean ‘something happened’ Remus?” Sirius could not make sense of these cryptic and vague words that Lupin was using.

“Surely you have already told him about this, Remus!” A third voice suddenly spoke up from the doorway and both men turned around to see Minerva McGonagall standing inside the room, looking very displeased.

“Minerva? I… I didn’t expect to see you here.” Lupin was the first to react to McGonagall’s presence as he stood up to greet her.

Sirius on the other hand, remained seated the way he was but chose to make himself look a little more presentable as he sat up straight and tried to wipe the sullen look off his face.

“Albus sent me, he said that the information we have on the incident would be safest here at Grimmauld Place. And with Alastor still at Hogwarts, this was the perfect time.” McGonagall explained as she turned to face Sirius, “I assume from your puzzled expression Sirius that you have not been informed about what has happened?” She asked.

“I was about to tell Sirius everything…” Realizing that this was on him, Lupin stepped forward to take responsibility.

“What exactly _has_ happened Minerva?” Sirius asked her bluntly, hoping one of them would stop talking in circles and simply get straight to the point directly.

“Remus, would you show him the letters?” Was all McGonagall said as she waited patiently. There was no rush for her to return to the school yet, there were much more important things to be done here.

Frowning at the non-answer he got, Sirius debated for a second whether or not he should say something, but when Lupin handed him an envelope, the handwriting looked familiar to him. It was Minerva’s; she had written a letter to Lupin and was now asking him to read it? And for a moment when he glanced at his friend, Sirius could have sworn that he saw… worry in Lupin’s eyes. That only confused him more, but when he looked down at the letter as he started to read, everything changed in that moment.

“Is this some kind of a joke?” His voice was soft but firm when he finally spoke up, fingers tightening around the glass ever so slightly as he looked up at both McGonagall and Lupin.

“I can assure you Sirius, this is no joke.” She said to him, knowing full well that there was a lot more to the story that needed to be told; in order for him to understand everything, she would have to explain it all.

“That’s impossible.” Sirius could feel the anger rising within him, the words in this letter sinking in slowly but none of it making sense.

“It seems that way yes, but unfortunately what you have read is the truth.” McGonagall was now sitting down opposite Sirius and observed him, seeing the emotions in his eyes - anger, pain, confusion, hurt, sadness, loss.

“But… how?” He looked into her eyes and asked the question so sincerely, that for a moment Sirius forgot about his anger.

“I’m afraid that I do not have all the answers to your questions Sirius, but what I do know are the facts as they stand.” Now was the time to begin, “The little girl whom I brought here last night, she _is_ the daughter of Thomas and Evelyn McKinnon.” After exchanging a quick look with Lupin, McGonagall went on with her story, “As you well know, Thomas was the youngest brother of Marlene McKinnon. He survived the attack in 1981; the details of that have not been divulged, but in the aftermath of losing his entire family, he went into hiding for the next 14 years.” She paused for a moment, to let Sirius process her words.

“Tommy McKinnon… he survived.” Sirius repeated her words, remembering all too clearly that little boy he had met countless number of times while still at Hogwarts; Marlene’s brother, a decade younger than the lot of them and still someone he had grown close to.

“He was under Auror protection for the rest of his life, Dumbledore’s orders of course. He remains to this day, one of the very few people who knew that Thomas was still alive.” She said, “A boy of only 11, he would have started Hogwarts that September… but he never had the chance; times were still dangerous after the attack on his family and we did not want to risk losing another innocent life to the War.” McGonagall’s voice faltered then, but she composed herself, “This was before You-Know-Who went after James and Lily… and Harry… but by Halloween that year, Thomas was safely moved to an unknown location.”

“What happened to him?” Something had to have gone wrong; Sirius knew of Thomas’s fate, he just didn’t know how yet.

“When he was 18, all grown up and homeschooled, Thomas met a young woman who was assigned to him as the new Auror in charge of his protection and they fell in love.” She could see that Lupin had sat down as well and was listening to the tale, for he did not know any of this either. “Alastor had trained her personally, as soon as she’d left Hogwarts three years before; I remember meeting him one afternoon and heard him talk about her, my ex-student… Evelyn Lockhart.”

“Lockhart?” Lupin and Sirius both exclaimed in surprise as they turned their heads to McGonagall; she had their complete attention now.

“Any relation to Gilderoy Lockhart?” Sirius had to ask.

“That’s not possible… is it?” Lupin answered, “I mean… Gilderoy’s father was a Muggle and so were his two older sisters, neither of them were named Evelyn as far as I know.” He too knew that the name ‘Lockhart’ was not a very common surname in the Wizarding community.

“You are correct about that Remus.” McGonagall interjected, “And even though, Gilderoy’s father was a Muggle and his wife was a Witch, it was Lockhart Sr. who had a Wizard for a brother. He was estranged from the family, cut off all ties at some point in his life… we don’t know much about him, but Evelyn was his daughter.” She tried to make the family tree sound as less complicated as she could.

“So… that means, Evelyn and Gilderoy were… cousins.” By putting two and two together, Sirius made the connection between them.

“And he is Rose’s uncle.” McGonagall added, ‘Given the circumstances though, neither he nor anyone else in the Lockhart family know what happened to Evelyn or that she even had a daughter.” This was the most crucial thing that she stressed on.

“Why not?” Sirius still didn’t understand exactly what McGonagall was trying to tell him.

“Thomas and Evelyn never stopped hiding. Even after You-Know-Who’s downfall, the Auror’s continued to do their job because they believed that there was a danger of being discovered…” She began to say.

“By any of the Death Eaters.” Lupin finished the sentence for her, now everything was starting to fall into place. He also noticed that Sirius was nodding his head which meant that he had caught on as well.

“Precisely. And once Evelyn joined the team of Auror’s, they never once let their guard down… until… last week.” McGonagall said to the two of them.

“ _Last week_? Do you mean… that…” Sirius was shocked at hearing her words, last week meant seven days which meant that Rose had only just lost her parents?  

“Yes, they died last week.” McGonagall confirmed Sirius’s unspoken question, “And that is why everything has to be kept secret even now. People have gone missing all summer, but somehow, someone found out about Thomas and Evelyn, found their location and killed them both. We have to assume that it was on You-Know-Who’s orders, but we still don’t know enough.” It was frustrating to not know the whole story, but there wasn’t anything that they could do.

“It explains why Mad-Eye was furious last night.” Lupin said, remembering how the older man had reacted to the news.

“Albus did not inform him of the situation immediately because we were trying to find Rose and make the preparations to bring Harry here at the same time; but yes, that is why Alastor has gone to Hogwarts.” She had only briefly bumped into Alastor on her way out of Dumbledore’s office but the temper in his eyes were something which never went unnoticed.  

“And where exactly does Rose fall into all of _this_?” Sirius needed to know exactly what Dumbledore had planned when it came to the girl.

“She must be kept safe of course.” McGonagall stated the obvious, “As of now, she is the last surviving McKinnon, just like her father had been all those years ago. And if the Death Eaters found Thomas and Evelyn, they may learn that there was a child and come after her.” She said to him, meeting his gaze sternly.

“So why bring her here?” He could sense that there was something she wasn’t telling him, and if he looked at Lupin, Sirius felt that his friend did know what that was.

“Albus said that the Order is the safest place for Rose and I agree with him.” She hesitated for a second and Sirius picked up on that.

“There’s something more to it isn’t there Minerva?” Sirius needed to hear it from her.

In reply to his question, she simply nodded to Lupin and when Sirius looked at his friend, he saw that there were two more envelopes which remained sealed. Once they were in his hands, the answer became obvious, both were addressed to _him_ ; one was a letter and another, a rolled up parchment. Without waiting, Sirius tore them both open… and felt his heart stop for a second when he read the words across the parchment - _‘The Last Will and Testament of Thomas and Evelyn McKinnon’_ and the letter which bore his name was written by Thomas himself. As he read, Sirius realized that McGonagall was right; though she did not know the details of it… he knew that she must have suspected what the underlying message was going to be.

“They’ve named me her legal guardian.” There was one other thing in the letter which caught his eye and even if everyone else knew about it, Sirius did not want to mention this just yet.

“Well… that’s that then.” Coincidentally or not, at that exact moment, there was a bright flash of light in the room and when it dissipated, McGonagall was holding a Phoenix feather in her hands, Dumbledore had sent a message.

“What do you mean that’s that? This is… I can’t… I’m still a wanted man!” Sirius exclaimed as he stated the most obvious point which no one seemed to remember at this time.

“And yet, here you are… in one of the safest places apart from Hogwarts. The Order is where Rose must remain, especially now that it has been decided, you are to raise her.” McGonagall countered his argument.

“Wait. I never agreed to any of this.” He didn’t know what he was thinking or saying, everything was happening too fast.

“What is there to disagree on?” She asked him, raising an eyebrow and wondered if he was going to answer her or not.

“The fact that… this girl… she’s not meant to be kept locked up here like I am! She grew up in hiding and now you want me to continue the tradition?” It was ridiculous to think that he would entertain the idea of letting a young child stay hidden for the rest of her life!

“There is nowhere else for her to go Sirius, she has no family left.” McGonagall said, she could be blunt but soft about the issue; she did understand his hesitance but there really was no other way around this.

“I know that… but…” Sirius started to say before trailing off, knowing that there was no point in trying to explain himself to her when he wasn’t sure of anything.

“If you have anything else to say, I suggest you talk to Albus about it. I must return to Hogwarts now.” Time was of the essence and she had done her part; all the documents about Rose and her parents had been left behind on the table for safekeeping.

And before Sirius could protest any further, Minerva had disappeared just as quickly as she had shown up, leaving Lupin behind to talk some sense into his friend. Tricky as it seemed, the other man knew he had to try.

“Sirius…” The second he had seen McGonagall leave, Lupin was not surprised when he saw Sirius reach for the bottle of Firewhisky that remained on the table.

“Don’t. Just… don’t.” There was too much going on far too soon and Sirius didn’t even know what he was feeling in that moment.

“A drink isn’t the answer to all your problems.” Lupin tried to point out that but he could sense the other man’s stubbornness returning.

“Actually, it is.” Gulping down one glass, Sirius began to pour another, hoping that it would help him solve all the problems.

“Rose isn’t going to go away and you’re going to have to deal with the fact that she’s living here now.” If he had to be firm about it, Lupin would; there was no need for Sirius to be constantly drowning his sorrows in that bottle.  

“No.” Sirius said bluntly, saying only that and nothing else.

“What do you mean no?” Lupin didn’t like the way Sirius’s tone sounded; it was not final, but it didn’t sound of he was going to budge on this decision of his any time soon either.

“I mean… that Rose does not deserve to be here.” Speaking slowly as if to make his point clear, Sirius glanced at Lupin from the rim of his glass, finally realizing what he was trying to say.

“Are you even listening to yourself right now Sirius?” Sitting down in the chair where Minerva had sat, Lupin didn’t even bother for niceties any longer. “Rose… she’s… she’s Marlene’s niece… where else can she go?” He knew that the mere mention of Marlene’s name was a risk but he had to make Sirius see this decision was the wrong one.

“That’s exactly why I said no.” Sirius started to say, for he took a deep breath with the full intention of explaining himself.

However, before he could elaborate any further on what he was trying to tell Lupin, there was a thudding noise from somewhere nearby. The two of them looked around the room, thinking that perhaps Buckbeak needed their attention; but when they saw that the Hippogriff seemed to have fallen asleep and he was not the source of this noise, Sirius and Lupin exchanged a confused look. Five heartbeats later, something seemed to click inside Sirius’s mind as he immediately crossed the room and threw the door open.

“Where’s Tonks?” He asked Lupin, knowing that the Weasley’s had taken Harry and Hermione to Diagon Alley and if there was anyone else in the house at this hour, it would likely be Tonks.

“She’s not here.” Lupin replied as he followed Sirius outside. “She said she had to drop off some documents at the Ministry and speak to Kingsley about something important. Why? What is it Sirius?” Having just arrived at the house not more than an hour ago, Lupin didn’t quite catch on why his best friend suddenly looked pale.

Stepping out onto the corridor just then, there was something squishy by his foot and when Sirius bent down to look at the object, he realized what had just happened. There was an Extendable Ear lying on the floor, one of the twins’ inventions which he had heard of and seen firsthand; but there hadn’t been one outside the room when he’d walked in that morning, which meant… and as if to confirm the fear that had begun to grow in his heart, there was a second noise a few seconds later - one that sounded like the main house door slamming shut.

“Rose. She’s gone.” Sirius’s voice was barely a whisper, loud enough for Lupin to hear as they both realized that the girl had indeed left the house. 


	5. Chapter 4

Tonks took a deep breath as she tiptoed across the corridor, making sure she made no sudden noises so as to cause any undue disturbances as had happened every other day or two. The carpet was soft underneath her feet and thankfully, this back door entrance did not have any umbrella stands which she could knock over; and yet, as soon as she stepped inside the hallway, there was a loud slamming of the front door which startled Tonks. She didn’t have a chance to react for as soon as the noise echoed throughout Grimmauld Place, there came the all too familiar and _loud_ shrieking voice from somewhere close by.

_“Filth! Scum! By-products of dirt and vileness! Half-breeds, Mutants, freaks, begone from this place! How dare you befoul…”_

“Oh no you don’t!” This time, acting on her instincts, Tonks crossed the room in a few quick seconds as she approached the portrait of Walburga Black.

By now, she and the others were well aware of the fact that the only way to get her to stop screaming on top of her shrill lungs was to close the curtains shut immediately. It took several seconds of a struggle but with one big tug, Tonks was successful in her attempts and cut off the Black matriarch at last; taking a few deep breaths as she leaned against the wall, the young Auror thought that this was the only unexpected event of the morning, but little did she know… there was plenty more about to occur in the next minute. As if on cue, two heavy sets of footsteps were heard echoing from the above landing accompanied by loud voices, both of which she recognized instantly.

“Sirius!” Tonks exclaimed in surprise when she suddenly saw him hastening down the staircase, with Lupin close behind. “What…” She started to say but realized that the two men were in the middle of an intense discussion. Or were they arguing?

“This is madness Sirius! You can’t just risk exposing yourself to the world like this!” Lupin sounded worried more than angry, as he tried to stop his best friend from doing something dangerous.

“I know the stakes Remus… but it’s my fault… and I have to be the one to bring her back.” Sirius was adamant in his decision as he passed Tonks in the corridor, but not quick enough for she caught him by the hand.

“What is going on here Sirius? Where do you think you’re off to in such a hurry?” She didn’t know what was going on but since Molly and Arthur were still out, it fell to her and Lupin to keep an eye on Sirius until they returned.

“Rose has run off, you didn’t happen to see her on your way in did you?” Answering the question before Sirius could say anything, Lupin turned to Tonks, hoping that she could talk some sense into him.

“ _What_? That little girl ran off on her own? When? What happened?” She understood now what that noise had been only a few minutes ago; she had arrived at the house a little too late to stop Rose from running away.

Tonks also knew that she wasn’t strong enough to hold Sirius but he wasn’t attempting to break free… yet. Silence fell amongst them for a long minute during which she was able to focus on Sirius and see the look on his face; whatever had happened with Rose, he had just admitted to it being his fault. He was fighting to bottle up all his emotions, but this… this was… risky to say the least.

"I said something... something that she heard thanks to those Extendable Ears lying around... and now she's run away because of that." Sirius explained to Tonks, hoping that she would let him go.

"So let Tonks and I organize a search party to find Rose." Lupin suggested, resting a hand on his friend's shoulder, "It's been only a few minutes, she couldn't have gotten far; we can find her." He knew that Sirius wasn’t thinking clearly.

"No. It's too dangerous..." That was all Sirius was able to say before Tonks cut him off.

"Sirius! You're still a wanted man! And there could be Death Eaters looking for you too... it's not dangerous for me to go out and find Rose. Let me help." She tried to reason with him.

"I know how dangerous it is for me, but I also know that the girl is my responsibility. She ran away because of me. And I know where to find her." Sirius realized he was being impulsive and even reckless but if something happened... no, he couldn't think like that.

"It's no use trying to stop you is there?" Lupin said at last, watching his best friend closely as he tried to make sense of what was going on in Sirius's mind.

"Nope, but I'll be back soon." It felt as if hours had already passed since Rose had run off but Sirius knew it hadn't been more than a quarter of an hour at the most.

"Be safe Sirius." Tonks finally relented too and let go of his hand.

"I will." And with that, Sirius changed into his animagus form, racing out the door as soon as it opened.

The good thing was that Sirius knew this area around Grimmauld Place better than anyone. It also helped that this particular day had been rainy, the grey clouds hung low and dark, making it easy for him to slip through the streets silently as he kept to the shadows.

It didn't take long for him to follow the scent of Rose he had picked up the previous night when she'd first met him in this form. Within a few minutes, the large black dog had found his way to a familiar old park that was abandoned and knew Rose was here. Entering the park, Sirius didn't have to go too far for he could see that there was a tiny figure lying on the wet grass under a big oak tree; a form that resembled Rose. Slowly and swiftly, the dog made its way to where she sat.

"Who's there?" Rose, who had been sitting with her head down, resting on her knees, looked up as soon as she heard a noise that startled her momentarily.

She hadn't thought things through when she ran out of the house; but when she saw Sirius standing only a few feet away from her, Rose was relieved. Her plan wasn't the best, she hadn't accounted for the rain which had soaked her completely from head to toe and on top of everything else, she had tripped on something which hurt her ankle and turned it red.

"Sirius?" She recognized him instantly and for a second was scared that he was mad at her, but when she saw him come closer and nudge her left leg, Rose realized that he had seen her injury.

A soft growl escaped from him as he touched Rose's ankle with a paw. There was nothing he could do here but he wasn't going to let Rose walk back home either.

"I'm okay, it's a small cut." Rose said, as if she knew what he was thinking. "I can walk." She told him and stood up shakily, but fell back down almost instantly.

Another growl from the dog told her that she shouldn't try standing again. Rose was tired and cold and hungry, so she simply nodded.

"What do I do?" She asked him, wondering how they would get to his house now.

In answer to her question, Sirius sat down on the grass and turned his head slightly toward his back. Rose watched him for a minute and then understood what his plan was; she stood up once more, as carefully as she could, leaning against the tree bark this time for support and gently used both her hands to climb up on to his back. The black fur under her fingers was soft and silky smooth... and once he started to walk out of the park, Rose soon found herself resting her head against his back, hands wrapped around his neck and closed her eyes.

Within minutes, Grimmauld Place came into sight once Sirius stood in front of the entrance; he could see Lupin waiting for them inside and once the doors opened, he slipped inside quickly, Rose still half-asleep on his back.

“What happened?” Lupin was surprised to see the young girl looking pale and cold as he lifted her in his arms, giving Sirius a chance to change back.

“She fell and hurt herself while running in the rain.” He finally said as he shook off the water from his robes, not bothering that he was soaking wet too as he took Rose from Lupin and carried her into the hall.

The moment Sirius walked inside, holding Rose, he noticed that Harry and Hermione had returned with the Weasleys and they were all waiting anxiously. As soon as they saw him, Harry jumped up from the chair, with Molly at his heels; from her expression, Sirius knew that she was not pleased at his decision to be the one who brought Rose back.

“Sirius! Are you… is Rose okay?” Harry asked his Godfather, sounding worried. He had just returned from Diagon Alley to find that Rose and Sirius were both nowhere to be found; but seeing the condition that she was in, he didn’t say anything else.

“I… I don’t know.” Sirius wasn’t paying attention to everyone hovering around the girl as he lay Rose down on the sofa, feeling her fingers clutching his shirt tightly. “I’m not sure. She hurt her ankle while running and she’s been out in the rain!”

He was worried, and with good reason; this wouldn’t have happened if he had just tried to… to talk to her directly, explain what she must have overheard him say...

“It wasn’t your fault Sirius.” Tonks began to say to him but he cut her off before she could finish.

“Yes. It was.” Was all he said, “I need to get her warm and changed into different clothes, can you help me?” Turning around to face Tonks for a moment, Sirius decided to move her upstairs to his bedroom where he could keep an eye on her.

“Yes, of course.” She replied and laid a hand on his shoulder, “She’s going to be fine.” If there was one thing Tonks knew she could do, it was to keep reminding Sirius of this fact.

Sirius couldn’t answer her in that moment even if he wanted to because Molly chose to finally speak; though her words were not what he had expected to hear.

“Make sure that you bandage up that ankle properly, I’ll go and get some soup ready for when she wakes up.” The sternness in her voice was unmistakable, but more than that, Molly sounded concerned for Rose than anything else.

“Molly…” Sirius was surprised to hear her words but she interrupted him with a knowing look on her face.

“We can talk about your reckless behavior later. Go, take care of Rose.” She said to him, and this time he knew that she meant it.

Unable to stop himself, Sirius did his best to hide the grin forming across his face; Molly may have been angry with him and there was certainly a lot he would be hearing about from her, but she knew that his main priority was Rose before anything else. Without wasting anymore time, he picked her up once more and walked with Tonks to his room. The two of them were silent for a few minutes as they worked to make sure that Rose’s leg was bandaged as well as her wet clothes replaced with something warm. Sirius waited with his back turned away from the bed as Tonks first took care of changing Rose into pajamas before taking over.

He removed his wand from within his jacket, pointed it just above the injured ankle and whispered a spell which would help Rose to heal, “Ferula.”

Sirius and Tonks both watched as a tiny splint and bandage immediately wrapped Rose’s ankle perfectly, not too tight and not too loosely, for she didn’t stir. Now that her main injury had been dealt with, there was only the matter of the slight fever she seemed to have developed; being carefully tucked under big blankets were keeping her warm, but Sirius couldn’t remember the when he had taken care of someone who was ill.

“Do you want me to…?” Tonks asked Sirius, and not for the first time was he grateful to have her here with him.

“Yeah… okay.” He replied with a nod and sat down on the edge of his couch to give Tonks enough space.

Sirius knew that Healing magic was something Tonks had more experience with and though he had just cast one spell, this next bit needed a lot more concentration and patience… if he did anything wrong, then Rose could end up getting worse instead of better. It didn’t take too long for Tonks to finish casting the spells which were required to recover from a bout of fever and when she was done, Sirius let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding.

“Rose should be better by the time she wakes up.” Coming to sit down beside Sirius, Tonks turned to look at him properly now, “She’s a strong girl..” She knew that there was so much more she wanted to talk to him about but started small.

“I know… you’ve always been pretty decent with Healing spells.” Sirius said, not tearing his gaze away from the bed just yet, he was going to stay and watch over Rose for the rest of the day if he had to.

Tonks seemed to have sensed this, she could be very observant when she wanted to and today was about being there for Sirius. They had only recently started to reconnect after spending so many years apart; it felt like yesterday that Tonks had seen him visiting her family - the fearless and brave 16 year old boy who chose to leave this place, find his place in the world on his own terms, being free, she wondered often if there were still signs of that Sirius Black somewhere inside the man that she saw now. He wasn’t free now, even though he had escaped one prison, she knew that coming back here to his ancestral house was no less than Azkaban for him… and there was also the fact of his innocence which hadn’t been proven yet. Tonks couldn’t even begin to imagine what he was going through but she could try.

“Remus told me what happened… before.” Tonks spoke up at last, knowing that she needed to initiate this conversation.

“So you know.” His voice was soft, but he did not turn around to face her just then; the words he had uttered, the words which most likely had been heard by Rose were still playing on his mind.

"Yes. I do." She didn't know exactly what Sirius was thinking of in that moment, but Tonks did have something to say. "I heard that you were named Rose's legal guardian." It was probably better to start with that instead of… other things.

Hearing those words again, Sirius couldn't help but let out a sarcastic laugh; he still didn't believe how that was even possible.

"There must be a mistake, no one in their right mind would make _me_ anyone's guardian." He said, "I’m the last person Tommy should have considered; he had to have known that I'm a wanted man... I've spent twelve years..” Sirius trailed off, before changing his sentence, “She deserves better."

"Have you thought of the possibility that maybe Tommy McKinnon believed you're innocent?" Tonks didn't wait before she spoke, knowing this was a delicate topic Sirius never discussed.

"Why would he think that?" Sirius didn't quite understand where Tonks was going with this train of thought. "Tommy and I weren't close friends... I never saw him after that... that summer." He said, referring to the last time he had spent with Marlene and her family.

"That is true, but you are forgetting one important thing Sirius." Still looking at him to gauge his reaction, Tonks went on before he could ask her anything. "I was just a kid when I heard what happened to you... but when I reached Hogwarts, that was the time I learned almost everything I could about you. The stories I heard, of you and James, two best friends who were as brothers... all the pranks you played together, all the things you accomplished with each other's support, I heard it all. And _more_ from my mother whenever I came home. And I believed, with all my heart, that someone so loyal and caring as you were towards James and Lily, couldn't have been responsible for what happened." Tonks suddenly stopped, feeling her eyes watering, forgetting what she wanted to say.

Her abrupt silence combined with the honesty in her words made Sirius finally look to her. And though he didn't know what to say in reply, Tonks wiped away the unshed tears and picked up from where she had left off.

"If I could believe that you were innocent then I'm sure Tommy McKinnon believed too." She knew it sounded like nothing more than a guess, but at least it was something.

"And how would that come about exactly? He never had the chance to attend Hogwarts like the rest of us." Sirius pointed out the main problem in her theory, though he was glad to hear Tonks trying.

"Evelyn. She could have told Tommy; from what little I remember about her, I'm sure..." Tonks had an answer to this question but Sirius didn’t let her finish explaining herself.

"Wait. Did you just say that you knew Evelyn? As in... Evelyn Lockhart?" He interrupted her, wondering what else Tonks knew and hadn’t mentioned to him or anyone else for that matter.

"Yes, is there any other Evelyn that we've been talking about?" Frowning at him, Tonks hadn’t realized that she had not brought this up before; then again, now was the only time she did have the chance to tell someone.

"No... but why did you not say anything about this before?" Sirius knew that Tonks would have heard Evelyn’s name the previous night when Lupin discussed it with her and everyone else.

"I didn't know her personally... it's not like we were friends. By the time I joined Hogwarts, Evelyn was already in her Fifth Year." She finally managed to get the words out, not letting Sirius cut through again.

"So you _didn't_ know her." It was simply an observation on Sirius’s part, but in spite of all these vague and uncertain points, he didn’t feel as bad as he had earlier.

"Well, we were both in Hufflepuff... she was a prefect, I was a First Year... I knew of her more than anything." Tonks specified and came back to the point she had been trying to make, “Look, all I’m saying Sirius, is that both Tommy and Evelyn could have had very good reasons for naming you as their daughter’s guardian. Whether they believed in your innocence or they just hoped that you would be able to keep her safe, we will never know why; what matters now is honoring their last wishes… right?” She could be very direct when she wanted to and Sirius could see that.

“Did you know that they named her after Tommy’s sister?” Sirius didn’t answer anything that Tonks had just said to him, but rather chose to mention the one piece of information which he hadn’t shared with Lupin nor McGonagall.

Without saying anything else, Sirius handed the letter over to Tonks for her to read.

"Oh." Was all that she could say after skimming through the letter and seeing it for herself.

"Marlene Rose McKinnon." He whispered, "That's her legal birth name; they used to call her 'Marlene Rose' at first but after a while she started responding to only 'Rose' and both Tommy and Evelyn realized it was better. Safer."

“I suppose.” Tonks waited to hear what Sirius was going to say next.

“She ran away because of me; because of what I said, and if I hadn’t… then she would be okay right now. If I can’t keep her from running away, how am I supposed to _raise_ her?” Sirius finally started to open up.

“What happened with Rose today wasn’t your fault, it was more a miscommunication than anything.” It wasn’t lost on Tonks to notice that apart from the one time Sirius had used her full name, he hadn’t called her ‘Rose’ all along, “And we don’t even know what she heard to make her run away; she could have just been scared of something.” She tried to reassure him, hoping that he would stop blaming himself.

“I just… I don’t want her to feel alone or unwanted or unloved; even before I knew who she really was, I did want to help her, but now I feel that I’ve already failed Tommy and Evelyn. And Marlene.” The sadness in his voice was apparent, but Sirius wasn’t giving up hope, he just didn’t know if he had any left.

“You haven’t _failed_ anything Sirius… all relationships start off with a bump here and there.” Tonks reached out to touch his shoulder again, “I never said that I stopped believing in you, you know? I have faith that you and Rose can figure this out… together. Talk to her when she wakes up.” She suggested.

“Thank you, Dora.” Sirius said to Tonks, “I know I don’t say the words enough but I do mean it.” He was even able to give her a half-smile.

“You’re very welcome, _Siri_." Grinning widely as she stood up to leave Sirius with his own thoughts, Tonks decided to try her hand at making Sirius feel better; it was an innocent remark and had an instant reaction.

“No, no. Don’t do that… don’t call me that… please.” This time around, Sirius sounded more taken aback and a little embarrassed rather than upset or angry; he made a face when he heard his infamous nickname. He had never liked it but still appreciated Tonks's attempt to cheer him up.

Tonks didn’t give any indication that she heard Sirius for she had left by then; he did hear her soft laugh as the door closed, leaving him to focus his attention on Rose. Walking over to the bed, Sirius sat on one side and gently touched her forehead to check her temperature, which seemed to have dropped slightly. Throughout the whole time that had passed, she remained asleep and already had some color returning to her cheeks… it was a good sign and he felt relieved already. Now was the time to watch over her and wait until she woke up.

 

 


	6. Chapter 5

If there was one thing that Sirius could be certain of, it was the fact that he really meant everything he promised, especially the promises made to himself. True to his word, for the most part of the day, Sirius didn't leave the room; his entire attention was devoted to keeping an eye on Rose. There were a few instances when he had company - Molly came up with food a little while after Tonks had left, she hadn't lectured him as much as he'd thought she would but he did listen patiently even if it felt a bit silly, Lupin arrived close to the evening and Sirius did take the opportunity to apologize to him for what had happened earlier, Harry and Tonks checked in as well, but during the rest of his time, he was deep in thought as he waited.

There were hundreds of things running through his mind, but the one instance which stood out... was all of his own experiences that he'd had with running away from this very house. Sirius remembered it as clearly as ever; the first attempt at escaping Grimmauld Place was after he had turned 7, just a few weeks after his birthday. It hadn't worked out of course, but that didn't stop him from trying over and over again, until he had finally left that summer when he was 16, when he'd run away to the Potters at Godric's Hollow… those were the best years of his life, no matter how short lived they turned out to be; he knew that he would do it all over again if he could, in a heartbeat. And yet, even as he thought about his own experiences, he realized the difference between him and Rose was quite glaring… the last thing Sirius wanted was for her to feel the way he had for most of his life, she wasn't haunted by the past, she wasn't touched by darkness, not as he had been for far too long that he didn't remember what his life was before… Rose may have suffered the loss of her family at such a young age, but she wasn't completely alone. It was in that moment that Sirius decided no matter what, he would do his very best to make this a home for her, try to be there for her and hopefully help her heal.

_"You and Rose can figure this out… together."_  Tonks's words echoed in his mind as he sat on the sofa facing the fireplace, staring into the red and gold flames, his gaze drifting over to Rose who lay asleep on his lap now.

She had briefly woken up for a few minutes in between, long enough to eat something and to have her temperature checked; Sirius hadn't asked her anything else and neither had she said a word to him, but that was not the right time. Looking at her now, all he could see was how peaceful Rose seemed and untouched by everything happening around her and wondered…what it would be like to sleep so soundly.

He was deep in thought in that moment that he didn't immediately sense when Rose began to stir; her eyes flickered open and as she sat up, Sirius turned around, giving her a small smile, hoping they could finally talk about what had happened that morning.

"How are you feeling Rose?" He asked her, knowing that before anything else, Sirius needed to know that she was better.

"I'm okay…" Rose said softly as she rubbed her eyes, but she looked fresh after having rested for the whole afternoon. "Where am I?" She was starting to realize that this wasn't the same room she'd slept in the previous night, everything looked much different here.

"This is my room, I brought you here to rest…" Sirius began to say, "I don't know if you remember what happened this morning, when you were out in the rain."

"I know." Nodding her head as she understood that it was time to talk about her actions, Rose looked up to meet Sirius's gaze, "I am sorry I ran away." She apologized softly and hung her head low, bringing her knees up to her chin, hugging her legs.

"Hey, hey… look at me." Sirius had a good idea about what was going on in Rose's mind, but he needed her to believe that none of this was her fault, "Rose." He spoke softly and reached out to touch her cheek, making Rose look up once more. "I am sorry for what I said… I should have talked to you about it first and explained that I never meant for my words to make you feel sad."

Hearing his words surprised Rose a little, she had been so confused and scared when she heard Sirius talking to Lupin about her and her first instinct in response was to run; but maybe she should have stayed and listened to what Sirius wanted to say.

"I… the Ear…" Rose whispered, "You said, ' _Rose should not be here, I said no'_  and I…" She couldn't finish the sentence, but in the second when she sniffed and rubbed her nose, Sirius left his seat beside her on the sofa and knelt down in front of her just as he had the first time they'd met.

"It's okay love, I know… I'm sorry." He said to her again, taking a hold of both her hands in his, hating that she was still feeling the sting of his words; even though it had been unintentional, Sirius had hurt Rose and now all he could do was tell her what he really meant. "There was more to what I said about not wanting you here, I… I was trying to say that you deserve a chance at a better life; I had just found out that you and your parents had been living in hiding for so many years and I did not want you to go through that again Rose." Sirius hoped his words were getting through to her, "The idea that you were going to be staying here and be in hiding, never getting to see the world and having a normal childhood, I didn't want to put you through it… but I know now that I was wrong… and believe me when I say this love, I… I  _do_  want you here, I want you to stay, if you will have me."

"You do?" That was the only thing Rose needed to hear, she did want to believe Sirius with all her heart.

"Yes, yes Rose. I do." He would say the words to her every single day if it would help; having her here, Sirius could feel a change, not just in the house, but within him… a slow change… for the better perhaps?

"I want to stay here." She said to him and at last managed to smile for the first time that day, a big bright smile.

"Good, I'm happy to hear you say that. And I am sorry, again." Sirius added once more, even though he knew that things between him and Rose were starting to get better, it would take time for them to truly move past this but he was hopeful.

"It's okay." Rose shook her head and told Sirius that there was no need for him to keep apologizing to her.

Just as she was about to make a move to hug Sirius, Rose noticed that there was a piece of paper sticking out from his pocket and she wondered what it was. As if he knew exactly what she was thinking, Sirius wordlessly removed the envelope which he had shown to Tonks earlier and now held it up for Rose to see as well; she deserved to know what the letter said.

"It's a letter. From your parents to me." He explained to her, waiting for a heartbeat to pass before continuing, "Would you like me to read it to you?"

As soon as she heard Sirius mentioning her parents, Rose snapped her head up to stare at him; this was the last thing she had expected to hear… a message from them… after… she didn't know what to say, she didn't even know if she could say anything, but she did want to know what they had said to him and so Rose simply nodded. Sirius remained where he was, on the floor with one hand holding Rose's and the other which held the letter; he glanced at her once again before he began to read.

_"Dear Sirius,_

_I know it has been many years since you and I have met, I don't even know if you even remember me now… this may seem like an odd request, especially since I am well aware of your situation and what happened to you. My words probably will not mean much to you, but we have always believed in your innocence Sirius. Though I may have been young at the time and simply a child when you and my sister were at Hogwarts, the friendship you had with James and Lily was truer than any relationship I have ever come across in my life. And I remember always hearing Marl telling me stories about all the pranks and fun times you used to have together… I am truly sorry for your loss… I know how it feels… I've never quite healed after losing Marlene, but I was able to move on with the help of my beautiful wife. Yes, I know, it seems strange doesn't it? Little Tommy finally grew up and found love at last. It is true, I did meet someone special and Evie has been my one constant in all these years of solitude. And together, we both found happiness in these dark times when our little girl was born… Marlene Rose… there was no better name for her, do you not agree? From the moment I first held her in my arms, I could not believe that this was possible, that this beautiful baby was really ours, that she would be able to change the world for us, but she has… and the four years that Evelyn and I have had with her have been a blessing._

_This might be asking too much of you, but if there was any chance that we could keep Rose safe from all the dangers that are still out there, we wouldn't wish to trouble you… and even now it pains me to think that I may not be a part of my daughter's life for much longer, there is no certainty of what tomorrow may bring, but all that we would want is for our little girl to be safe. To have a chance of living. And you are our only hope Sirius. There is no one else we trust more. We only ask that you take care of Rose and raise her to the best of your abilities; she deserves a family, and I do not mean to be rude when I say this - but I think that you do too. Please think about this at least… if anything were to ever happen to Evelyn and I, if we were to be found by the enemy, all we ask is for our daughter to be kept safe. I do not know what happened between you and my sister, but I do believe that she loved you until the day she died, and I know you loved her too. Please. For Marlene's sake. Don't let her niece get caught up in this war. I beg of you._

_Thank You,_

_Thomas and Evelyn McKinnon."_

When he had finished, there was a moment of silence that hung in the air between him and Rose. Sirius was watching her closely, waiting to see how she would react. It didn't take very long for that… almost a few seconds later, he saw her lower lip quivering and the next thing he knew, Rose had flung her hands around his neck as she cried… Sirius who had been expecting something like this didn't say a word as he held her in his arms, letting her cry; he could feel the sobs making her body shake as the tears continued to fall and though his heart was aching for her, he couldn't help but wonder if this was the first time since… losing both her parents that Rose had cried. She may have been in shock all along, the reality sinking in a week later. And so, the two of them stayed that way for a few minutes as Sirius rubbed her back to slowly calm her down.

"It's okay love, I have you…" Sirius whispered to her once he sensed that the worst of it was starting to pass already.

However, before either one of them could say or do anything else, there was a sudden disruption in the room, a very loud one which startled Rose… without any sort of warning, several heavy noises that sounded like - *THUD* *THUD* *THUD* in a continuous loop surprised her and she jumped, breaking away from Sirius only far enough to look around, a little scared. For his part, Sirius had been equally surprised and quickly scanned his room, finding the source of the noise… a half dozen or so books had fallen off the bookshelf… of their own accord?

"What was that noise?" Rose asked him as she turned around to see where Sirius was focused on.

"Books falling. Don't worry, I'll take care of it." His brows were furrowed as he gently lifted Rose to sit her back on the sofa, before walking across the room to where the books lay scattered in a small pile.

Sirius was in deep thought as he picked up the books from the floor and placed them back, thinking about what had just happened and how; looking over to where Rose sat, he noticed her wide eyed, silent stare and that was when he realized... this sudden disruption from the bookshelves were a result of her magic! Was it even possible? She was still so young, and even though most witches or wizards didn't display any outward signs until they were a little older, perhaps her emotional outburst had acted as a trigger, causing some of the books to fly off the shelf.

"S… Sirius?" Rose's voice called out to him, a soft whisper that could barely be heard over the crackling flames of the fireplace.

"Yes love?" He left the last book aside and walked back to where she sat on the sofa, with her legs tucked in and arms wrapped around herself as she had done before.

"Did I… did I do that?" She asked, looking a little scared after what had just happened.

There were so many thoughts in her mind that she couldn't make sense of, one minute she was crying in Sirius's arms and the next, the loud and frightening sounds of books toppling off the shelf on their own. It was no secret to Rose that she knew about being a witch herself; she had seen magic being used in front of her many times now and even if she didn't understand everything… perhaps it was  _her_  magic that had done this to the books.

"Yes, you did." Nodding in agreement to her question, Sirius gave her a smile, "That was your first time doing magic wasn't it?" He asked her in return; knowing that she must be scared and curious, Sirius took this as an opportunity to distract Rose from other thoughts.

Still a little surprised at her own abilities, Rose simply nodded her head... unsure of what to say to him next.

"It's perfectly normal to be a little worried about your magic Rose…" As if he could sense her thoughts, Sirius spoke up, "I know what I felt the first time I used magic when I was a little older than you... but believe me, it is a wonderful gift and in time when you start to learn how to control and use magic freely, especially when you go to Hogwarts, you'll find that magic changes your life in ways you can never imagine!"

"Really?" Piping up with curiosity now, Rose wanted to know more about magic; she wasn't thinking about the letter or her parents for the moment and she did feel a little less sad.

Seeing her newfound interest in magic, Sirius couldn't help but chuckle when he saw Rose looking at him intently.

"Oh yes, really. Tell me, has anyone told you that you can use magic without a wand?" He paused to see Rose shake her head before continuing, "And what about without even speaking?" This was an opportunity he could use to make her smile.

"You can't do magic with no wand and no talking!" Rose insisted, for she had always seen magic used in only those forms before.

"Would you like to see if I'm right or wrong?" An idea had come to his mind and Sirius thought that if he could bring back that sweet smile of hers that he had seen the night before then he'd know that she would be okay.

"Yes please!" Beaming brightly, Rose sat up in eager as she wondered what Sirius was going to do.

"Alright then... prepared to be amazed." Sirius announced dramatically.

First, he made a show of pushing up the sleeves of his jacket to show that his wand was not hidden there. When Rose checked both his arms to be sure, she gave him the go ahead and waited excitedly for his magic.

"Hmm... what shall we do?" He pondered out loud, there were a lot of idea's in mind, but something simple would be enough for now.

"Magic! Any magic... I don't mind." Rose wanted to see that this would work, so that one day she would be able to do it herself.

"As you wish." Without saying anything else, Sirius reached a hand out to where Rose sat and pulled a flower from behind her ear.

"Oh!" She was surprised to see the flower appear out of thin air and immediately clapped her hands.

"A rose for a rose, love." Sirius said, handing a single red rose to her.

Taking it from his hands, Rose felt it with her fingers and knew it was real. Even the scent of the flower was real.

"Thank you Sirius!" Rose exclaimed happily as she sat up and hugged him tightly. "I love it."

"You're welcome my dear." For someone who hadn't been hugged by many people in a long time and certainly not so many times in one night, Sirius didn't mind it at all and was happy to hug Rose back.

The hug lasted but a few seconds, for Rose had not yet recovered from her cold. Without any warning, she sneezed twice, just as soon as she had separated herself from Sirius.

"Achoo!" She sneezed once more, her nose turning red now and eyes watery as she sniffled.

"You still have a cold!" Sirius was a little worried now, and jumped to his feet. "Come on, let's get you to bed, I'm sure that you just need a good night's sleep." He knew that panicking wouldn't help, everyone was probably asleep already... but this was a common cold and he could handle it.

"Okay…" Rose nodded her head, too tired to say anything else. Her ankle did not hurt anymore, but she wasn't sure if she could walk all the way to her room.

Sirius, who had turned away from Rose for a second, noticed her trying to get down from the couch, but he wasn't having any of that. He knew that Rose had slept for a few hours already, but with the emotional outburst from crying and using her magic, it was better if she rested more.

"Where do you think you're off to love?" He asked, seeing Rose pausing to look at him.

"My room." She replied, rubbing her nose, "To sleep."

"Not tonight." Was all Sirius said, walking over to Rose and carefully lifting her up in his arms. "You're sleeping here tonight. I'm going to watch over you; if you need anything, I'll be here." He said, carrying her back to the bed.

Rose was starting to nod off by then, but Sirius didn't mind... he knew that she had eaten something and would be okay until the morning. As he set her down on his bed, gently unlinking her arms from around his neck, Sirius smiled when he saw Rose settle in almost immediately. He made sure to tuck her with the covers; once he felt that she was going to be fine for the night, Sirius moved to get up, only to feel a tiny, soft hand grabbing his wrist.

"Rose?" He called out softly, thinking she was stirring, but he saw that she was fast asleep.

She had snuggled into the familiar thick covers while continuing to hold his hand, a hint of a smile on her face. Sirius sat there, on the edge of the bed, watching her for a few minutes... deep in thought... Rose had been here for about 24 hours now and so much had happened since then; but despite his reservations and concerns about taking care of her, Sirius was aware that his life had already changed and this was only the beginning.

"Sweet dreams love." Sirius said, resting his other hand on top of hers and bent down to kiss her forehead.

Whatever lay in store for the two of them, Sirius knew that he wasn't going to let Rose face anything alone. He had agreed to Thomas and Evelyn's request, but even in spite of that, just having spent time with her, Sirius was already feeling that they had formed a bond of trust between them. There was, however, the matter of Sirius's own company and how he tried to wrestle with the nightmares that he was forced to experience every day... something which Rose would soon discover. For the rest of the night, she slept peacefully, without tossing and turning even once... she definitely was sleeping much better than the previous night. And Sirius stayed by her side, still holding her hand.


	7. Chapter 6

The sun was starting to rise when Rose awoke the following morning. She yawned once, stretching her arms above her head and rubbed her eyes, searching for Sirius. He was standing by the window, staring at the gloomy August sky, looking more tired than he had at night.

"Sirius?" Rose called out to him, twisting the blankets with her fingers, wondering if he had gotten any sleep.

"Good morning love." The sadness that she could see in his eyes suddenly fade away when he turned around, "How are you feeling now?" Sirius asked as he came to sit on the other side of the bed.

"Better now." She answered, feeling refreshed; her head wasn't pounding anymore and her nose felt fine.

"I'm glad." He smiled, and Rose hesitated for a moment, seeing that the bed had not been slept in where he sat, but she didn't say anything. "Are you hungry?"

"Yes, I am." She said brightly, deciding to ask him about this another time; he really did seem happier.

"Alright, let's go get some breakfast. I'm sure I can whip something up for you." Sirius held out his hand for her to take.

Within a quarter of an hour, Rose was dressed and ready for the day. It seemed early even now, the house felt a little cool and quiet all around, as if no one else had stirred from their sleep yet. Although when Sirius walked with her to the kitchen, they were greeted by someone unexpected.

"Harry? What are you doing here?" Sirius glanced at the clock and saw the time, which surprised him to see his Godson was awake.

"Sirius! I was just... in the mood for some early breakfast." Harry glanced up from his chair at the dining table when he heard his Godfather's voice.

“Well then allow me to entertain you and Rose with my cooking skills.” Waving his wand, Sirius instantly retrieved all the necessary ingredients without _too_ much of a noise, “So what would you like to eat?” He asked the two of them.

“I’ll just have some toast and eggs.” If there was any sign of surprise in Harry’s voice as he realized that Sirius was actually cooking breakfast… at quarter past 7 in the morning, no one else picked up on it, but seeing his Godfather like this made Harry forget about his worries for the moment.

“May I have milk?” Rose chimed in as she sat down beside Harry and watched with immense delight at the scene unfolding in front of her eyes.

“Of course you may love!” Sirius replied and within minutes, he had not only managed to prepare a tall glass of milk, chocolate flavored for Rose but had also successfully made Harry’s breakfast quite perfectly too.

Once all was said and done, the three of them were seated at the table, Sirius having opted only for a cup of tea, quietly observed his Godson who hadn’t said much in the last several minutes or so; add to the fact that he was absent-mindedly picking his food told Sirius all he needed to know. There were many possibilities which would explain Harry’s behavior that morning, but perhaps the one which seemed most important at this time was what troubled the young wizard. And while Rose was happily enjoying her breakfast, Sirius took the opportunity to speak to him.

“You know, if my cooking skills aren’t all that good as I said they are, you can tell me Harry. I’m a big boy.” Starting off with an innocent comment, Sirius figured it would be the best way to go about this.

“Sorry, what?” Harry glanced up from his plate, noticing that Rose was aware of what was going on around her but didn’t say anything; turning to face his Godfather, he realized that he hadn’t fully heard what Sirius had said to him.

“Are you alright Harry? You seem to be worried about something… it’s the Hearing isn’t it?” Sirius asked, getting straight to the point now.

“Yeah… I’m just… I don’t know what’s going to happen… if I get expelled…” The idea of not being able to go back to Hogwarts was a feeling that Harry didn’t want to dwell on too much, but it was either thoughts of the Hearing or the nightmares and he’d had enough of those.

“You have nothing to worry about, my boy; what happened that night with your cousin… saving his life from the Dementors, it was the right thing to do. And I don’t doubt that the Hearing will prove your innocence.” Sirius said, hoping that his words would reassure him, “Besides, _if_ you were expelled, then you know that you’re always welcome to stay here.” He added as an afterthought, thinking that perhaps it wasn’t the best thing to say but Harry needed to know that he was not alone.

“Thanks Sirius.” Harry smiled when he heard his Godfather call him ‘my boy’ because as simple as it sounded, he knew what it meant… that they were family and if anything were to happen then Sirius would want him to stay at Grimmauld Place.

After that, it didn’t take long for Harry to delve into his breakfast which really was delicious and he told Sirius as much; to that, the older wizard let out his bark-like laughter and that in turn caused Rose to giggle as well… in the midst of all this, there was another unexpected surprise when the kitchen door opened to reveal that both Tonks and Lupin had arrived already.

“Good morning everyone!” Tonks exclaimed cheerfully as she saw so many people awake at this early hour, “What’s going on here?” She also hadn’t expected to see that there was breakfast laid out on the table around which Sirius, Rose and Harry sat.

“Sirius cooked food!” Rose announced, having finished her milk by then and ran over to hug Tonks before moving to hug Lupin next.

“He did what?” Thinking that he hadn’t heard the little girl properly, Lupin knelt down in front of her, “I thought I just heard you say that _Sirius_ made breakfast?”

“Ha ha, very funny Moony… I’m sitting right here.” Sirius said to his friend as he too stood up to greet him and Tonks.

“I had no idea that you could cook Sirius.” Sounding genuinely surprised, Tonks made her way to Harry first who vouched for his Godfather almost instantly.

“I didn’t know about it either, but the eggs were great.” Harry was happy as he shook hands with both Tonks and Lupin.

“Well then, I expect you to make me breakfast as well now!” Tonks said when she finally reached Sirius, surprising him with a hug _and_ a kiss on his cheek. “Something special maybe?” She added, beaming brightly at her cousin who was still processing her sudden happiness.

“I’m sure I can think of something.” He said at last, turning to Lupin who had been standing there, watching the two cousins, “Remus? Any breakfast requests?” Sirius asked him, not picking up the change in his behavior in that moment.

“Just tea.” Lupin answered softly and sat down on the chair which had just been vacated, trying his best not to stare while Tonks followed Sirius, talking with him in hushed whispers, standing close by and smiling all throughout.

It was only when he heard that familiar laugh of his best friend did Lupin tear his gaze away from the pair and met Harry’s look of surprise.

“He’s done that twice in the last half hour.” Harry said, referring to Sirius’s laughter; it was a rare occurrence for them to have witnessed.

Little did all of them know, Sirius included, that his happiness wouldn’t last very long. For the most part of the morning, he did remain in good spirits… even after Molly and the others woke up… and as the day went on, once the cleaning resumed in the study, things were still surprisingly going smoothly; Sirius had done his best to make sure that Rose didn’t get caught up in this work just yet since she was still not fully recovered. When she eventually did give in, he’d asked Tonks to take her upstairs to her room which she shared with Hermione and Ginny. And so, for the next few hours that passed, Rose found herself trying to take a nap, to no avail.

It was dark when her tiny little figure appeared on the second floor landing; the door to the library was slightly ajar with flickers of light being visible from within and Rose stood just outside, shuffling her feet as she thought if this was the right place. She’d spent the last fifteen minutes trying to find Sirius in vain. Her bedroom wasn’t as fancy or even comfortable as his bedroom had been the previous night, and if Rose was being honest with herself, she wasn’t used to sleeping alone, especially in a strange and new house as this. And so she quietly slipped out of her room in search of Sirius, hoping he wouldn’t mind her company, but she hadn’t found him in his own room nor was he in the attic with Buckbeak.

“Where is he?” She whispered out loud, glancing at the library door, wondering who was inside.

Rose knew that everyone had spent all afternoon cleaning the house and sure enough, even though the sun had set, she could clearly hear the loud but muffled voices of all the Weasleys, Harry and Hermione as they seemed to still be working. Perhaps Sirius had remained downstairs with them? And yet, somehow, she had found herself out here in the corridor where the library was located. Rubbing her nose which was luckily not runny anymore, Rose sighed and decided to head for the kitchen and find somebody who could tell her where Sirius was. However, just before she could turn around, Rose heard a strange noise coming from inside; she paused and hesitated long enough to hear it again. To her tiny ears, the noise sounded like someone was in pain and that was all she needed for her to open the door and enter the library.

“Hello!” Rose called out, glancing around, not seeing anyone just yet.

As with the rest of Grimmauld Place, the library felt very ancient and a bit dusty, but in spite of that, Rose sensed something comforting to be surrounded by books all over the place; there was even a fireplace burning bright - the source of flickering light she had seen from outside - and a pair of armchairs placed around a coffee table beside the sofa. That was when Rose found who she was looking for; Sirius was sleeping there… but the moment the little girl focused her gaze on him, she realized that something was very wrong. Sirius seemed fast asleep but his face was contorted in pain, his hands were gripping the leather tightly and he was moaning something over and over again… it didn’t take Rose more than a few seconds to sense his fear; she didn’t know what was wrong, but she wasn’t about to wait to find out, her heart was already aching to see him like this.

“Sirius?” She whispered his name softly as she walked closer to where he lay and touched his hand, hoping to wake him up.

There was no response, but now that Rose stood beside him, she could hear his voice when she leaned in to listen.

_“James… Lily… please no… forgive me… I’m sorry… don’t!”_ For the first time since she the accident, Rose could hear the same fear that she’d felt with her nightmares in Sirius’s voice; he was scared… and she didn’t know what to do.

“Sirius. Wake up.” Rose shook his arm, thinking that maybe he was having bad dreams, and as much as it was scaring her to see him like this, there was no time to leave Sirius alone and go find someone else.

_“I didn’t do it… I’m innocent! No…”_ His voice was sad and Rose found herself trying not to cry, she had to be brave for him.

Resigning herself to do something before things got worse, Rose glanced at Sirius once and hoped she could help him. She gently pulled up onto the sofa as she climbed it with ease, but since there wasn’t enough place for her to sit, Rose stood at the edge, clutching the headrest with one hand as she reached forward to pat Sirius's cheek with the other.

"Sirius!" She put a little more emphasis in her voice and sure enough, this time it worked.

Everything that happened next was much too fast for her to process; she knew that as soon as Sirius was awake, he jolted up almost instantly and not knowing that she was right there on the sofa with him, Rose felt herself falling down, when all of a sudden his arms were around her waist as he caught hold of her.

"Rose! Are you okay?" He looked like his old self again but Rose could see traces of whatever haunted him in his grey eyes.

"Yes, thank you." She replied, her heartbeats slowing down as he clung to him, not wanting to let go just yet.

"What happened? Why are you here? Is everything alright?" Sirius was relieved to have sensed Rose was near as soon as he woke up and that she was fine.

"I'm fine... I was looking for you." Rose started to explain, "I saw you sleeping and... you were having a bad dream." She said still seeing the sadness reflected in them.

Hearing her admit to being around when he was having one of his nightmares, Sirius sighed deeply, knowing what it was probably about and how Rose might have been scared. He hadn't told anyone else that his nightmares were still affecting him and now she knew... which meant she could say something to Tonks or even Remus. Or maybe she wouldn’t.

"You're right about that," Sirius spoke up at last, trying not to think about what would happen if Remus found out. "I was having a bad dream... but I'm okay now." He knew that his reassurance was more for himself than for her.

Even though she was young, Rose knew that Sirius only said that for her sake, so that she wouldn’t worry... but she wasn't going to let him just push everyone away... it was clear to her that even though he spent time with Harry and helped with the house cleaning and attended meetings with all the grown ups, whenever he got a chance, Sirius would close himself off from everything.

“What was it about?” She wasn’t sure if that was the best way to go about asking him if there was anything she could do to help, but Rose thought it seemed harmless enough a question.

Evidently not, for as soon as the words were spoken, Rose could immediately sense that Sirius suddenly stiffened and the look in his eyes returned, not just sadness, but something else… a feeling that was similar to… pain? And yet, even before she could take her words back, Sirius found himself answering her.

“Harry’s mum and dad; they were my best friends… sometimes I dream about them… sometimes the dreams are bad.” His voice was soft, but thankfully Sirius knew that whatever he had been dreaming about was no longer something he could remember.

“You miss them.” It wasn’t a question, because now Rose understood what she could see reflected in his eyes, it was the same look she had seen in her own eyes the first night after hearing about her parents’ death.

“Yes, I do… everyday.” Sirius said with a deep sigh, before looking at Rose who seemed to be lost in her own thoughts, “But do you know something, Rose? The ones that love us never really leave us. And you can always find them in here.” He took a hold of her hand and touched it to her heart, giving her a small smile.

The young girl glanced up to meet his gaze and smiled back at him; if he was able to make her feel better then there had to be something she could do in return. She didn’t say anything more about the nightmare, but an idea did come to mind.

"My momma used to tell me when I had bad dreams that a special magic will make it go away." It was true that while she didn't know Sirius that well yet, he was taking care of her and that was all Rose wanted to do for him.

"Really? And what kind of special magic is this?" He was curious to know more... just being around Rose was helping him to forget his nightmare and focus on her.

Instead of saying anything in reply, Rose simply sat up straight, still on his lap, and kissed his cheek. If Sirius showed any signs of surprise, he didn't say anything to Rose but smiled a real smile which he knew didn't happen very often. And yet, in the three days that she had been here, she had done the impossible by making him smile at least once every day.

"Thank you Rose, that special magic does help." Sirius finally said to her, thinking about how much Rose continued to remind him of her aunt Marlene; how she was always going out of her way to make him laugh back when they were at Hogwarts together, just starting to be friends.

"I have one more thing!" Happy that Sirius was feeling better, Rose decided to go all in.

She slowly clambered down from Sirius's lap without any explanation, and before he could ask her where she was running off to, he saw her walk over to a stack of books lying on the floor. For her part, Rose wasn't sure what she was looking for exactly, but when her glance fell on an old and tattered book with it's title covering most of the front with a strange picture of a circle inside a triangle, she found herself wanting to know more about it.

"What's this you've found love?" Sirius asked, once Rose had come back to the sofa.

"I don't know. It looks old." She replied back, handing the book to him and climbed up to sit on his lap again.

"Oh? Let's take a look then shall we?" As soon as he glanced at the book, Sirius felt a slight ache in his heart.

"What is it Sirius?" Rose was getting better at reading his features and wondered why he seemed sad again.

"Hmm? Nothing... nothing at all. I just... I remembered that this was my old copy of a book that I gave to Harry's mum back when we were in school together." He had opened the book now and started to trace the name _'Lily Evans'_ that was scribbled in a corner.

"It was the first birthday present I ever gave Lily after we became friends." Sirius continued, "She didn't know much about Wizarding fairytales and was always going on about stories like ' _Alice in Wonderland_ ' and ' _Thumbelina_ ' which she loved. I never heard of those before and I remember that the year after, Lils gave me her book of Muggle Tales to read." Thinking on that memory brought a wistful look in his eyes.

Rose, who had been silently listening to Sirius reminisce about his past, now wondered where that book was.

"Do you still have it?" She asked, thinking that maybe she could find it for him.

"No, I don't think I do. I'm not even sure how I found this one or where the other disappeared to..." Sirius suddenly realized that Rose was waiting for a story to be read. Cleaning his throat, he focused on the present moment, "Right, that's enough of that, shall we see which story we're going to read?"

"Yes please!" Rose was excited, she knew what she needed to learn from Sirius and now wanted him to focus on reading, hoping that it would help him.

"Alright then, this is ' _The Tales of Beedle the Bard_ ' and I'm going to read you my favorite story from this... what say love?" It had been a very long time since Sirius had had a chance to read any of these tales but was glad to have the opportunity to do so for Rose.

"What is the story called?" All that Rose could see was the index which had 5 separate tales and lots of pictures as well as runes, even if she didn’t know what those were yet.

"Ah yes, I'm glad you asked that." Flipping the pages to the second story of the book, Sirius began to read, "The Fountain of Fair Fortune... are you ready?" He clearly remembered his Runes for once he started reading, it was almost as if the story was translated in simple English.

Rose nodded her head and settled in to a more comfortable position, resting her back against his chest so that she could see the pictures inside.

_"High on a hill in an enchanted garden, enclosed by tall walls and protected by strong magic, flowed the Fountain of Fair Fortune. Once a year, between the hours of sunrise and sunset on the longest day, a single unfortunate was given the chance to fight their way to the Fountain, bathe in its waters and receive Fair Fortune for evermore."_

There was something soothing about the way he narrated these tales, but Rose did not want to simply fall asleep and ruin this nice quiet time that she had with Sirius. Instead, she was constantly turning her head to glance up at him every time he used a different voice and emphasis when reading out the character dialogues; it took some effort on her part to not giggle at how cute he sounded. And even when he finished reading the first tale, Rose insisted that he continue, moving on to the next story, “ _The Wizard and the Hopping Pot_.” It was only when he had reached the third tale,“ _Babbity Rabbity and the Cackling Stump_ ” almost an hour later, did Sirius sense that Rose had indeed fallen into a deep sleep, curled up on his chest.

“That’s all for tonight.” He whispered to Rose as he closed the book and carefully set it down on the table, making sure that he didn’t wake her up.

The big and ancient grandfather clock that thankfully never chimed loudly anymore told him that it was past 9 o’clock; but even though the two of them probably had missed dinner and no one had come looking, Sirius knew that the others were giving him and Rose some space and alone time together. And so, he chose to stay there in the library for a little while longer until he was sure that taking her back to his room wouldn’t disturb her.

“Goodnight Rose.” Sirius kissed her forehead as he soon found himself drifting off as well, hugging his arms around her gently... and for the first time in many nights, he had a dreamless, peaceful sleep.


	8. Chapter 7

The next few days that passed were seemingly uneventful, unless one counted Harry’s hearing which turned out to be a big event once he and Mr. Weasley returned… cleared of all charges! Rose had been very happy to hear the good news; and even if she didn’t quite understand why Fred and George along with Ginny kept chanting _‘He got off, he got off..._ ’ it certainly did make her laugh. That happened almost a week ago, and since then, it was not lost on the little girl that although Sirius had initially appeared happy for Harry as well… he now seemed to be spending most of his time with Buckbeak. Not that he wasn’t taking care of her at all, no. Rose knew that Sirius was speaking to her more than anyone else and he had practically moved her belongings to his room which they now shared together; she just didn’t know what exactly was bothering him… until she accidentally stumbled upon Harry, Ron and Hermione having a talk amongst themselves on the third floor as they were cleaning.

Rose had just finished her share of work, helping Tonks and Ginny with some clothes troubles and was on her way to see Sirius when she heard voices from a nearby bedroom. It wasn’t her intention to listen in on the conversation but the tone of Hermione’s voice and the mention of Sirius’s name did the trick.

“Don’t you go feeling guilty Harry! You belong at Hogwarts and Sirius knows it.” Hermione sounded a bit stern as she spoke, “Personally, I think he’s being selfish.”

“That’s a bit harsh, Hermione… you wouldn’t want to be stuck inside this house without company.” Ron said in reply, countering her statement and Rose couldn’t help but linger by the doorway as she listened.

“He’ll have company!” said Hermione a little too loudly, “It’s headquarters to the Order of the Phoenix, isn’t it? And he has Rose to think of now. He just got his hopes up that Harry would be coming to live here with him.” At the mention of her name along with Harry’s, Rose finally understood everything about Sirius’s moods and was about to leave before someone noticed her, but when Harry spoke up just then, she stopped to hear what he had to say.

“I don’t think that’s true. He wouldn’t give me a straight answer this time round when I asked him if I could.” Harry’s voice was much more softer but Rose was able to hear him clearly.

“He just didn’t want to get his own hopes up even more.” Hermione started to say, “And he probably felt a bit guilty himself, because I think a part of him was really hoping you’d be expelled. Then you’d both be outcasts together.” Based on Hermione’s words, the only thing that Rose could think of was that Hermione seemed to have answers to everything about this.

“Come off it!” Harry and Ron said together at the same time and Rose jumped a little; hearing how both the boys spoke startled her momentarily and yet, she remained rooted to the spot, curiosity getting the best of her without even realizing it.

“Suit yourselves. But sometimes I think Ron’s mum is right, and Sirius gets confused about whether you’re you or your father, Harry.” Hermione said at last, after a brief pause.

“So you think he’s touched in the head?” Harry asked her, still seemingly angry, making Rose wonder what that meant.

“No, I just think he’s been very lonely for a long time.” Was all Hermione would say on the matter before falling silent again.

It was at the exact moment did Rose hear footsteps on the staircase, heading her way; the noise prompted her to quickly hurry on to where she had intended to go all this time… to see Sirius… and yet, once again, she found herself hesitating for a second. She didn’t have an opportunity to really let the words sink in, but from what she had gathered, Sirius was lonely, he did not want Harry to go back to the school but would not say anything about it to anyone?

_CRACK!_

“Hello Rose!” Fred, who had just apparated only a few feet away with George, called out to her just then.

“How are you this fine day?” George asked, before Rose got a chance to say something.

“I’m okay. How are you?” She asked the twins in return.

Seeing the two of them suddenly gave her an idea; if what she had heard the other night at dinner from Lupin was true, then maybe it was possible that Rose knew how to help Sirius.

“Splendid!”

“Brilliant!”

“Couldn’t be better I say.” This was most likely George who spoke now; Rose still wasn’t exactly sure how to tell the Twins apart.

“Is there anything we can do for you?” The second twin, Fred most likely, asked her as he caught the look on her face.

“I need chocolate.” She said to them simply, remembering Ron saying that they always had chocolates on them wherever they went.

“Ah, well you’ve certainly come to the right place if you’re looking for chocolate.” Rummaging around in his robes, one of the twins searched for his stash, but came up empty handed; it was his brother who had a handful of almost everything hidden carefully.

“Now then Rose, do you know what kind of chocolate are you looking for?” There were little pockets inside the robes and each of them was stuffed with candy. “We’ve got all kinds from Honeydukes - Acid Pops, Bertie Botts Jelly Beans, Chocolate Frogs, a pack of Drooble’s, Fizzing Whizbees, Ice Mice?” He named all of the items he had, pointing to where they were stored, “How about some Licorice Wands? Sugar Quills, Toffee, Treacle Fudge!” And that was that.

“Just chocolate.” Rose, who had been trying not to stare and laugh in amazement at how organized everything was, repeated her request.

“She means plain ol’ chocolate you git!” Smacking the other’s head just a little, Fred caught on to what it was that Rose needed.

“Oi, watch it! Who’re you calling a git eh?” Rubbing his head, George feigned being hurt before turning back to Rose as he pulled out a big colorful wrapping of chocolate and handed it to her. “Sorry about that Rose… here you are, one bar of Honeydukes Best Chocolate, you’ll be feeling happy in no time with that!” He added emphatically.

“Really?” Unable to help herself from smiling brightly when she heard that, Rose took a moment to tell the twins that this was appreciated. “Thank you!”

“It was our pleasure. We’ll see you around!” Both Fred and George gracefully bowed down as they spoke at the same time and waved goodbye.

With another _crack_ , the twins had disapparated away as quickly as they had arrived. Rose was a little surprised, but also used to seeing both Fred and George constantly doing this every chance they got and it always brought a smile to her face. However, without forgetting what the plan was, she hurried on ahead. In a few minutes time, Rose was standing outside Buckbeak’s room as she so often found herself lately; Sirius had to be there for she hadn’t seen him anywhere else in the whole house, this was the one place where he could have his privacy. And as she quietly entered, Rose was met with a lovely surprise.

“Ah, there you are love!” Sirius said, noticing her instantly, “Just in time too don’t you think?” He was standing by the entrance with his arms crossed, watching the Hippogriff from a safe distance.

Staying by the door and behind Sirius, Rose peeked around him and noticed Buckbeak who was standing up tall and majestic, with his wings spread out wide. The bedroom had been magically altered just enough so that there would be plenty of space for the Hippogriff to be able to move around a little whenever need be; this was the first time that both Rose and Sirius had seen Buckbeak at his fullest height together. He didn’t do this very often, owing to the fact that he was also staying hidden for his safety, but once in a month, it did him some good.

“He’s so big.” Rose whispered, not realizing when she had reached out to grab Sirius’s jacket as she watched Buckbeak in awe.

“Yes he is.” Nodding in agreement, Sirius didn’t need to look back at Rose as he took her hand in his; the Hippogriff had already finished eating for the day and would soon settle down into a deep slumber. “We should let him sleep.” He said just then.

For a moment, Rose wondered if that meant they were going to leave and head downstairs to Sirius’s room… she hadn’t quite gotten used to referring to it as _her_ room yet; but she was surprised when he tugged her hand to draw her closer into the room. Buckbeak was just about finished stretching his wings and on turning his head to look in their direction, Rose tried her best not to get too scared. The idea was for Sirius and her to take turns in bowing down in front of the Hippogriff as they had done before… even though he was used to them, Buckbeak bowed his head as well… and after that, it was time for a long nap while Rose followed Sirius to the other end of the room where she sat down on the windowsill with her legs tucked in. She had a few minutes to watch him now; he had fallen silent which she didn’t mind at all, because it also gave her the opportunity to think about what she’d heard earlier.

As Rose understood it, Sirius was not completely happy about Harry going back to Hogwarts whenever the time came. And though she also knew that he wouldn’t be _alone_ in the house since she lived there now, there remained one fact which wasn’t hard for her to understand - Sirius hadn’t known her for as long as he’d known Harry. So, the least she could do, was try and make him feel a little less sad; which is why Rose had carefully hidden her newly acquired chocolate bar inside the jacket she was wearing.

“Are you okay love?” Sirius suddenly asked her, before she could get a chance to speak up first.

He had managed to sense that Rose was in deep thought about something; he picked up on her being very soft-spoken within the first few days, but because of spending so much time when it was just them, Sirius felt as if he slowly… started to become more attuned towards her.

“Yes, I’m fine.” Rose didn’t know whether it was better to first ask Sirius about his moods or just simply offer the chocolate to him without saying anything.

“Rose…” There was that change in his voice which she noticed when he called her by name. “You know that you can tell me anything right?” He said, turning away from the window.

“I know. I am okay.” She replied again, and decided on what she wanted to do. “I… umm… I got this… for you.” Reaching inside the pocket, Rose carefully took the bar of chocolate out and handed it over to him.

“Honeydukes Best Chocolate.” Sirius almost instinctively knew why, when he saw what it was. “Thank you, love.” He gave her a half-smile, which wasn’t much, but to her, it was a start.

“Chocolate makes you happy.” Rose stated, repeating the Twins’ words to Sirius and hoped this would really work.

“Is that so?” Once more, Sirius realized that if he didn’t have Rose by his side almost everyday, he wouldn’t be able to have a reason to try and smile a little more. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to try and see for ourselves won’t we?”

“Oh yes!” Her eyes lit up when she saw that Sirius was starting to open the chocolate already; if he ate some now then she would get to see for herself if he did feel happy.

Within moments, the two of them were busy munching on a piece of chocolate respectively and even though Rose was enjoying herself thoroughly, since she couldn’t remember the last time she’d eaten something so tasty, her eyes were fixed on the man sitting across from her; from what she could tell, he didn’t seem any _different_ once he had finished his share… but… Sirius did catch her staring at him and when she smiled innocently without saying a word, that was when Rose knew she was successful in her mission for he not only smiled back in return, it looked more like a big grin. Something he hadn’t done in days.

“Thank you Rose.” Sirius finally said; after spending most of the past week sulking, he truly was feeling better now and it was all because of her simple gesture.

“For what?” Tilting her head to one side, Rose hadn’t expected him to speak with such a soft tone.

“For making me smile again.” He admitted without hesitation, “I am very bad at trying to remember it myself, but when you brought me the chocolate because you wanted me to be happy, that is when I realized…” A pause was followed by a sigh before Sirius continued, “I need to be happy for me and for you.”

“I am happy… when you are happy.” It took her a few moments to find the right words to say, but Rose did mean what she finally said to him.

Their brief time of peaceful silence didn’t last very long… mere moments after, there was a knock on the door as it opened to reveal Lupin standing at the threshold, looking very concerned about something; there was a slight change in his manner that Sirius observed, not unlike how he had seen his best friend that night when he’d first met Rose, though this time, Lupin had a grim look on his face.

“Sirius, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a minute.” Walking across the room, past Buckbeak, Lupin didn’t wait to get an answer as he pulled up a chair from the table and sat down in front of Sirius and Rose.

“Alright. How can I help Remus?” Sirius noticed that there were no papers of any kind in Lupin’s hands and yet, it seemed that he knew what the topic of this conversation was going to be about.

There was a momentary pause when Lupin realized that Rose remained where she sat, glancing up at him but not saying anything yet. And seeing her then, this little girl who constantly seemed to be smiling and laughing whenever he saw her, as well as being able to make Sirius smile… Lupin faltered, as if unsure of wanting to say what it was; but it wasn’t uncertainty, it was a feeling of his heavy heart at being the one to deliver the new information he had just learned of.

“Well, it’s… perhaps we could talk about this, in private?” Lupin said slowly; he didn’t _want_ to send Rose away, but he wasn’t sure what would happen if she stayed either.

“What is _this_ exactly Moony?” His attention focused on Rose now, Sirius saw that she was still quiet but constantly looking back and forth at the two men.

“It has to do with the… investigation of what happened… with Thomas and Evelyn.” He was wringing his hands as he spoke and at the mention of her parents, Rose snapped her head up to stare at Lupin, “I have some information.”

“Whatever it is, you can say it here. Rose isn’t going anywhere.” Sirius said to Lupin as soon as he’d felt Rose’s hand reaching out to grab his; he knew she was scared, but after everything that they’d been through in these last ten days, she deserved to hear the news.

Nodding his head as he prepared to speak, Lupin did catch on to Sirius gently squeezing her hand as they exchanged a quick look; Rose did look worried, but this sign of having a small physical touch seemed to help her stay calm.

“What of my momma and daddy?” She asked, finally finding her voice, soft though it was… Rose wanted to know.

“Moody has taken up the responsibility of this case, with Dumbledore’s permission, even though he didn’t need it.” Lupin started to say, knowing Rose wouldn’t understand much at first, “He was trying to learn about Thomas and Evelyn’s Secret Keeper. To see if… the Witch or Wizard was the one who… may have given up their location.” He paused, already feeling the tension in the air around them.

This was an extremely delicate topic for both friends to be discussing. They each had a painful experience with what it meant to be a Secret Keeper; he had been determined not to let the situation affect him as much, but Lupin knew that even after all these years… the despair which Sirius felt had never truly dissipated; Still, right now, the focus had to be on the McKinnon’s and Rose.  

“And did Mad-Eye find the… Secret Keeper?” Sirius asked after a beat.

He was caught up in the moment that he hadn’t realized his hands were trembling; not a lot, but because one hand was holding onto Rose, she felt it and placed her free hand on top of his.

“Yes. It was Lockhart.” Meeting his friend’s gaze, Lupin answered almost immediately, knowing what this meant.

“ _Gilderoy_ was their Secret Keeper?” This was surprising news to Sirius. From what he had learned about Evelyn and her family, he never expected to hear something like this.

“That’s what Mad-Eye confirmed when he went to St. Mungo’s.” Lupin said, before elaborating, “I don’t know how he did so, but it seems that after Rose was born, Evelyn reached out to her cousin once to ask him this favor and Gilderoy accepted. The Fidelius Charm was performed as well as the Tongue-Tying Curse which prevented him from revealing any information about Evelyn and her family. And because we know that he’s… permanently incapacitated, the secret has stayed with him even now.”

“Uncle Gil?” Rose suddenly spoke up, as if remembering a long lost memory.

“Rose? Do you… do you know your Uncle Gilderoy?” Sirius asked her, wondering if there was more to the story that she knew.

The little girl shook her head before answering, “No. I… I know about him. Momma used to tell me stories of Uncle Gil. I never saw him.” She said before asking a question of her own. “Momma said that he is sick now… is he okay?”

“Yes, yes. He’s fine, nothing to worry about.” Lupin reassured her before going on with his story. “There was another lead that Mad-Eye came across Sirius, one which had more questions than answers, but he isn’t giving up just yet.”

“What lead is this now?” Sensing the tone in Lupin’s voice, Sirius wondered what other surprises were left to be brought out into the open.

“Mad-Eye believes that… it may have been… Barty Crouch Jr. who found Thomas and Evelyn.” This was the difficult part to explain.

“How is that even possible?” Hearing that name, of all the people who could have posed a danger to any of them, Barty Crouch Jr. was the last person that Sirius would have thought of.  

“Well… after what happened to him last year, Mad-Eye has been retracing Barty Crouch’s steps, trying to figure out where he went, the things he did while posing as Alastor Moody.” Lupin explained, “The timeline is a little tricky since we know that for almost a whole year, Barty was at Hogwarts before he being turned over to the Dementors two months ago.”

“Exactly, so he couldn’t have been responsible for what happened to Tommy and Evelyn.” Sirius said, thinking out loud; none of these things were making sense.

“Not directly, no.”

“Are you suggesting…?”

“That’s what we’re not sure about. It could be that just before he was caught, Barty may have passed on the information to the other… Death Eaters.” At this point, Lupin knew only what he had been told and everything else was simply conjecture.

“There must be something that Mad-Eye knows for sure. Why does he suspect Barty Crouch in the first place?” Sirius asked the question that he’d thought of as soon as he heard the name.

“From what Minerva told me,” Lupin said, revealing his source for the first time since this conversation began, “I know that someone claiming to be Alastor Moody met Thomas and Evelyn just before he started his term at Hogwarts last year… and since the Mad-Eye we know didn’t have any memory of this meeting, it had to have been sometime immediately after Barty ambushed him.”

“There is someone else we can ask about this.” A sudden worrying thought came to Sirius as he processed all of the information and realized one very important thing that neither he nor Lupin had brought up so far.

In that moment, the two of them turned around to look at Rose, almost at the same time; for her part, Rose didn’t understand what was going on until Sirius asked her a question.

“Rose, do you remember meeting Mad-Eye last year? Did he come to your house?” Sirius hoped that her answer would alleviate his fears, because if it had been Barty Crouch Jr. then he may have known the truth about Rose.

“The… old man with… one eye?” Rose did remember seeing the Wizard whom everyone referred to as Mad-Eye Moody, it was hard to forget someone who had a spinning, magical eye.

“Yes. He would have been there some time after your 3rd birthday… did you see them then?” Time was a tricky concept for children, Sirius had learned as much, but he knew when Rose’s birthday was which gave him a timeline of sorts.

“No. I don’t… no, I only saw him when I came here.” It took her a moment before she answered.

“Are you sure?” Lupin couldn’t help but ask, they needed to know that Rose’s existence was still kept secret from the rest of the world.

“I did not see him, but I did listen to his voice.” Rose said, as she tried to remember what had happened that night. “My Daddy was there, in my room and he said to me to be quiet… like a mouse… and to stay there till he came back.” She was able to recall this memory because now, looking back on it, the whole thing seemed to be very unusual. “Nobody came to the house. Only him… I listened to his voice, talking to Momma.” That’s all she knew.

“So he doesn’t know.” Sirius said, sounding relieved, “If Barty Crouch never met Rose while disguised as Moody, he couldn’t have known about her.”

“That’s what Mad-Eye wants to confirm without a doubt.” It was one last piece of news that Lupin had for Sirius.

“What do you mean?” Frowning at that, Sirius wondered if he understood what those words meant.

“He’s trying to find a way to get permission to see Barty in Azkaban. To make sure that he doesn’t know about Rose.” Lupin knew how it sounded, Barty Crouch Jr. was possibly dead by this time; after the Dementor’s Kiss had been performed, his body was taken back to the prison, he was no more than a mere shell of a man now.

“There’s one thing I still don’t understand.” Sirius started to say, “They were at _home_. With Rose. And if Gilderoy didn’t reveal the location to Mad-Eye then how did Barty find them? And why were Tommy and Evelyn outside of their house on the day of the attack?”

“Your guess is as good as mine Sirius. I don’t know if we’ll ever find out all the details, but Mad-Eye’s not going to rest until he learns the truth.”

And then there was silence once again, the mood around all three of them suddenly changed to an unknown sense of foreboding. It was possible that Barty Crouch Jr. had revealed only Thomas and Evelyn’s location to the Death Eaters who had attacked them and no one else knew about Rose; save for Dumbledore, Gilderoy Lockhart and now the Order. Even so, Sirius was more determined to make sure no one else would learn of a surviving McKinnon.

“Sirius…” Rose broke the silence just then, staring at him and thinking of so many things that she had heard but didn’t quite fully understand.

He didn’t give her a chance to say anything else, the fear that was building in his heart hadn’t gone away; without a word, Sirius pulled her close to him as he wrapped his arms around her in a hug. It surprised Rose a little but she hugged him back and decided nothing else was important as long as she knew he was there for her.

"I promise to keep you safe, love. No matter what happens." Sirius said at last in a calm tone; this was something he had to do - not because she was Marlene’s niece or because Thomas and Evelyn had left her in his care. Nor was it because Dumbledore might have expected him to, or even McGonagall - the one and only reason that mattered was because Sirius wanted to do everything he could to protect Rose.


	9. Chapter 8

The library in Grimmauld Place was perhaps the most peaceful room for Rose to be without ever wanting to leave. She did enjoy her time spent with Buckbeak as well as the comfort of sharing a room with Sirius, because the house did get occasionally lonely, but something about how being in the library made her feel was what kept her going back at least once every day. Sirius was more than happy to utilize all those free hours with Rose in a productive manner; once Harry had left for Hogwarts and everyone else had also returned to their respective homes, there was a need for Sirius to set a routine lest he forgot how important it was to focus on a new day everyday. Together, he and Rose had formed a schedule which worked well in their favor - they would wake up at the same time every morning, get ready for the day, go down to breakfast, tend to Buckbeak before continuing their task of cleaning up the house, eat lunch, finish some more chores and by afternoon they would move to the library for several hours, check up on Buckbeak again, have dinner and sleep as soon as the clock struck 10.

At first, Rose had thought that once Harry was back at school, it would mean that Sirius would be sad and have bad dreams, but she was pleasantly surprised to see otherwise; there still were some nights when he did wake up in a sweat or moments when he would drift away into thoughts of the past or suddenly remember something painful which reflected in his eyes, but Rose was always there to make sure that he had her support. And Sirius was helping her too - not just by keeping a light on every night and reading her stories or letting her sleep on his chest, the last one being more of a mutual help to each other - he was also teaching Rose a lot of important and basic things during their time together in the library.

“Done!” Rose exclaimed happily one afternoon, as she sat up from her position on the carpeted floor which was scattered with parchments and quills everywhere.

“That was fast, love.” Sirius commented as he glanced up from his work, “Are you sure?” He asked, wanting to know that she had managed to complete her task already.

“Yes. I did it all.” She said to him, walking over to where he worked, holding a parchment in her hands.

“Alright, let us take a look.” Moving his chair to face her, Sirius took the parchment from Rose and studied it carefully.

While he was momentarily distracted, Rose did her best not to let the nagging curiosity in her mind win as she focused on Sirius himself rather than trying to sneak a peek at his work. It was a mystery… well more of a surprise… for her… but even though it had been _days_ since she first saw him take up this task, Rose wanted to know exactly what it was that he was doing.

“Well love, I do believe you’re right. And you did get everything written correctly too.” He finally said with a smile forming across his face.

“Really?” Beaming at his words, Rose came over to stand by his side and for a quick second, she noticed that there was a parchment covering the surprise which she’d expected.

“Yes, see here.” Sirius indicated to her work which had the names of 5 people written out -

_R.O.N_

_R.O.S.E_

_D.O.R.A_

_R.E.M.U.S_

_S.I.R.I.U.S_  

“All of your spellings are correct love! Good job.” He said, patting her head proudly.

It had fallen to him to take on the responsibility of teaching Rose everything a child at her age would need to learn; from the alphabet to colors from telling time to days of the week. Ever since September had begun, Sirius started schooling her. The library was the perfect place to do so, not only were there books and more books to learn from, but it also gave him the opportunity to rediscover an old passion of his. And with that came a change in him, one that seemed well overdue.

“Thank you!” Rose said as she gave him a quick hug before running back to sit down in the midst of all those parchments and quills, getting ready to start the next of her spelling work.

Sirius let out his bark-like laughter before resuming what he was doing. For several minutes, Rose scribbled away more names underneath the first five as she took her time to make sure she remembered what he had taught her. And yet, she was distracted by him, by his secrecy and by having to wait so long for this surprise of hers. She took a moment halfway through her third name and looked up to observe his new look quietly but carefully; his beard was still unshaven, the maroon jacket he usually wore was draped over the chair, black shirt sleeves were rolled up and his hair was tied up in a bun. None of this was the reason behind her curiosity, no… what had left Rose surprised more than anything were the splotches of color dotting his arms _and_ the fact that there was a paintbrush holding his hair in place while he used a different one for work. It was not lost on her that Sirius had started painting, but _what_ he was painting, she couldn’t tell.

“Sirius…” Suddenly, Rose remembered something that both she and Sirius seemed to have forgotten, something just as important as her spelling practice and his mysterious painting.

“Yes love?” Pausing once again, Sirius gave her his undivided attention as always.

“We forgot the story.” Was all she needed to say for Sirius to realize exactly what Rose meant.

“Oh, yes. We did didn’t we?” He said, setting aside his paintbrush for now; this was another aspect of their routine which they’d been following for the last ten days. “I did tell you about the wizard’s chess match already didn’t I?”

Rose thought about that for a moment, and then she nodded when it came back to her. Just a day or two ago, Sirius had indeed talked to her about a game called Wizard’s chess and she had been quite fascinated by the story. As per her request to learn all about Hogwarts and the life one lived in a beautiful Castle with different magical subjects and other adventures, Sirius would tell Rose a story everyday about his time there; the happy memories which he hadn’t remembered existed even after all these years had passed by. His shenanigans with James, pranks with Moony, late night talks with Lily in the Gryffindor Common Room, double duo matches of wizard’s chess - James and Remus versus him and Lily, the ‘incident’ in Year Three which was harmless of course or he wouldn’t have told a child about it, how he first met Rose’s aunt Marlene, but first and foremost, the day he and James both signed up to be on the Quidditch Team… that memory was the strongest, most vivid one of all… from the tryouts to being selected as Beater and Chaser respectively as well as their first match together.

“You said, _‘I will tell you about Padfoot_ ’ next time.” Rose piped up, knowing that this was the one which had stayed with her because this name was new and unknown to her, but it certainly sounded like an interesting story.

“Of course; the story about the Marauders - Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs.” Sirius began to say and then a second later, he fell silent.

Rose, who had been speaking to Sirius while still writing with her head bent down, didn’t realize what had happened until she heard a very unusual noise; at first she thought it sounded like a creaking, but when the loud _SNAP!_ reached her ears, she was startled. The first instinct she had was to look to Sirius and see if he was okay before finding out what the source of this sound was… but when Rose found herself staring at his face, she realized that something had happened, because the paintbrush that was in his hands now lay broken on the floor.

“Sirius?” Her voice was a soft whisper as she quickly got to her feet once more, going back to him and without a second’s thought, Rose touched his hand, snapping his attention to her.

The first thing that she noticed were his eyes… they seemed different. Over the past few weeks, those grey eyes had revealed many emotions to her, but for the first time, she was surprised; it hadn’t taken her more than a few seconds to recognize what Sirius’s eyes showed, and what she saw in them now was… anger. And though Rose may not have known why this was happening without warning, none of that mattered… Sirius in pain meant she needed to help… the more she observed him, the more she saw how affected he was by something he had just said - his hands were curled up in fists, his breathing heavy, and he didn’t seem to remember his surroundings. Still, as he met her eyes, Rose could see his attention focusing on her. He blinked rapidly and slowly started to relax his nerves, all the while feeling that tiny little hand holding his with just enough pressure to remind him she was here by his side.

“ _Rose_.” He finally said, her name sounding like a sigh, but Sirius knew that she had pulled him back from those dark places his mind had turned to the moment he’d spoken another name. “I’m sorry love.” His shoulders slumped ever so slightly and he sighed, covering his face with both hands.

“Are you okay?” Was all she asked him, tilting her head as she stood up on her toes to pull his hands away from his face, making him look at her.

“I will be.” Sirius managed to say and he instinctively reached to pull her up onto his lap and hugged her.

“We don’t have to talk about the story.” Rose could see that he wasn’t smiling and thought perhaps it had to do because of the name he had spoken of… the Marauders.

“No, it’s fine love, really.” His words sounded sincere as he went on, “Thank you, Rose. I’m okay now and I can tell you the story; there are _three_ people to talk about… Moony, Padfoot and Prongs.” He wasn’t going to let his reaction affect this tale, not if he could do something about it.

If Rose realized the change in his words, going from four to three people and omitting one name completely, she didn’t say anything about it to Sirius. What she did do however, before he began to tell her this story, was simply lean back a little, knowing his arms were safely holding her as she gently removed the paintbrush from his hair, letting it fall down loose and handed it to him without a word. And in that moment… having forgotten where his spare paintbrush had disappeared to, Sirius let out a chuckle. He took it from her hands and set it aside on his easel, deciding on another course of action; there was a sketchbook lying at the foot of his chair, from within he grabbed a Muggle quill called a pencil which worked wonders when he needed something different to draw.

“Right, so where were we?” Sirius glanced down at Rose, his left hand was still holding her by the waist and with his right, he was free to create something new as he spoke; it would be another thing to keep him distracted and calm.

“Moony, Padfoot… and… Prongs.” She said, turning just a little so that she could look up at him and still be able to see what this new painting was going to be.

“Remus, myself and James. We used special names because it was cool and also because we had to keep a secret; when you choose to learn how to become an animal, the most important thing to remember is that you must inform the Ministry and register.” If he was going to tell her about the Marauders, Sirius knew he had to be truthful.

“You did not?” Rose asked him, her eyes transfixed on the parchment now, seeing how fast his fingers moved and how he was still able to talk at the same time.

“No, neither James nor I did…” Sirius said with a laugh, remembering how that decision had come about one night in their Fifth Year once the transformations were complete. “Remus on the other hand, well… he was the reason why we decided to become animals in the first place. He’s a werewolf after all.”

“I did not know that.” Unsure of exactly how she was supposed to react, Rose paused and waited to see if Sirius would say something about it.

“Now you do; it’s been tough on him all these years, but when we found out about his condition, the only thing that made sense was to use this idea of changing into an animal so we could spend those few days on the full moon every month by his side.” He explained to her, “The way to change yourself into an animal takes a very long time, three years in fact, but we did it and ever since that day, I know that doing so was worth it.”

There was a brief moment, where Sirius felt his hand starting to tremble as he thought about the meaning behind his words, but he pushed it aside and focused on continuing his sketch; the idea was simple enough and he already had made progress in these few minutes.

“What animal was Harry’s daddy?” Rose asked. She already knew that Sirius was a dog and now learned of Lupin being a wolf, which left only James.

“A stag. It’s like a big deer, but with antlers?” Sirius said, but realized it was very likely he would have to show Rose a picture. “Anyway, the funniest thing that happened in school while we were still studying to become an Animagus - that is the right term - was the one month where James and I had to keep a Mandrake leaf on our tongue without swallowing it? I think… I don’t remember now, but Moony definitely had a hard time trying to keep us both out of trouble at the same time. Each of our professors reacted differently; Minerva knew from the beginning but we made sure that she would never be implicated as our… mentor, if something were to happen, then there was Professor Binns, he’s a ghost so that was a no-brainer, the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was a bit tricky and we also had Professor Slughorn to deal with, our Potions teacher… that was something else.” There was a wistful hint of a smile playing on his lips as he spoke.

“Moony… like the moon?” Having heard this name many times now, Rose thought about what the meaning was behind it, knowing that was the special name given to Lupin.

“Yeah, because of the full moon which turns him.” His sketch was halfway complete already, most of it had been hurried, including the words written below, but he kept the pace steady, “Prongs is the name we gave James because of his antlers, and I was called Padfoot because… well… dogs have padded feet.” He explained with a grin.

“I like Padfoot.” Rose said not a second later with a big smile. “What did you do?” She was curious to know more, this sounded like a fairytale in its own way; friends turning into animals in order to help another friend.

“Well… we created the Marauder’s Map… Harry has it now, but I can always ask him to show it to you when he comes to visit next.” Sirius told her, “It has all the secrets of Hogwarts, there are places to hide, you can see where everyone else is, pathways to places outside the Castle; that map is our legacy.”

“Wow.” One word, that was all Rose could say and at first, Sirius thought it had to do with him telling her about the map, but when he glanced to her, she seemed focused on the sketch.

“It is finished isn’t it?” He hadn’t even realized when exactly the drawing was complete but observing it now, Rose’s exclamation of wonder made sense, seeing as everything looked finished indeed.

“What is it?” She asked him as she stared at it in wonder, her eyes wide and curious; she could see animals and a letter and a big word written, something which was almost familiar and yet Rose wasn’t able to figure out where she may have seen this.

“This love, is the school crest.” Sirius said, as he began to describe the drawing in detail, knowing that Rose did recognize it now. “The big ‘H’ in the middle stands for Hogwarts, there are four animals to represent each of the four Houses - a lion for Gryffindor here on the left, a serpent for Slytherin next to it.” He pointed to the animal he had sketched on the bottom left, “This is the Hufflepuff badger and an eagle for Ravenclaw. And below is the school motto - _‘Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus’_ right here.”

“Draco… what?” Rose wrinkled her nose when she heard that sentence, wondering what sort of language that was.

“It’s Latin which is translated as ‘Never tickle a sleeping dragon’ in English.” By now, Sirius had set aside his pencil too and sighed, he’d been working on his original drawing for a few hours judging by the twilight sky outside.

“There’s a dragon in the school?” She asked, sitting up a little straighter on Sirius’s knee; if there was one magical creature she knew about, it was dragons.

“No, no… this is just a funny statement that the school likes to make. We don’t have dragons at Hogwarts. It’s one of the safest places in our world, but you already know that don’t you love?” He said to her.

“Yes.” Nodding her head, Rose turned around to face him properly now. “This is very pretty Sirius.”

She remembered asking about this painting hobby the first day that he’d started, watching closely as Sirius set everything up that he would need; his answer had been straightforward, art was a passion of his… or it used to be, back at Hogwarts… he told Rose about the time he last painted something was at the age of 18. And being able to do it once more, after all these long years, felt good.

“Why thank you love, it’s yours if you want it.” Sirius smiled as he made the suggestion to her.

“Really?” Rose had not expected Sirius to say that and felt happy on hearing his words; she knew that there was another painting he was making for her, but she couldn’t say ‘no’ to him.

“Yes really, I have a lot of sketches right here.” Reaching down to grab his sketchbook meant Rose had to wrap her hands around his neck to stay on his lap, it didn’t take Sirius more than a quick second.

“May I see them?” It was something which Rose wouldn’t have normally asked but seeing Sirius’s mood made her do so.

“Have you finished your spelling for today?” Sirius asked a question in return, not as a way to distract her from answering, he did feel a sense of nervousness; there was something he hadn’t mentioned to Rose yet. A tiny fact that _no one_ had ever seen these sketches, not all of them.

“I will get it!” Rose exclaimed happily as she jumped down from Sirius’s lap and ran over to the pile of parchments, picked up hers and brought it to him.

“Two in a row of correct spellings… this is very good work love.” He said to her after reading the next 5 names in her list -

_F.R.E.D_

_H.A.R.R.Y_

_M.I.N.N.I.E_

_M.O.L.L.Y_

_G.I.N.N.Y_  

“Thank you.” She was a little impatient now but waited quietly, until Sirius stood up and took her hand as they walked towards the couch.

“Right, well… here you are.” He gave Rose the sketchbook as she sat down, but held it closed with his hands for a minute. “First, let me show you what your surprise is?” Sirius knew he was stalling her, temporarily.

“Okay.” Nodding and trying her best not to bounce in her seat, Rose watched excitedly as Sirius went to his easel and removed the parchment of the Hogwarts Crest sketch which revealed the painting below.

When she saw what it was, this surprise of hers, Rose’s breath was taken away instantly… she had not known what to expect… perhaps a painting of herself or something simple… but this, this was beautiful and all the other happy emotions which she didn’t know the words to. Sirius had painted Hogwarts for her; but not just the Castle, he had worked on the details of everything into this painting - the Great Lake with the green trees, white clouds, grey rocks, a few black colored birds, and the castle with all its towers standing tall and majestic under a bright blue sky. It looked exactly as it did when she had stayed there.

“Wow… this is more pretty… I love this.” Rose finally found the words as she met Sirius’s gaze and hugged him tight. “Thank you, Sirius!” She didn’t know what else to say but he understood her perfectly and sat down by her side.

“You’re very welcome love, I’m happy that you liked it.” He said, and decided it was time; without wasting another minute, he opened the sketchbook for Rose to show her everything he had ever drawn since he was 15.

If there was another word apart from ‘wow’ which could sum up Rose’s reaction to seeing his works, Sirius figured it would be ‘oh!’ because judging from the look of wonder on her face, there was little else she could think of. The sketches were mostly of different people, friends and family alike; he spoke only to tell her who the respective drawing was of and then waited, for she took _minutes_ to study each and every single one of them with her complete attention riveted to the page. She saw it all - a sketch of James leaning against the bark of a tree with a golden Snitch, one of Lily with a book in hand, Lupin sitting in the Gryffindor Common Room, two of his friends Frank and Alice, a revelation when Sirius pointed out his younger brother Regulus, some scenery pictures of the Castle, Hagrid’s Hut, the Lake, there were even drawings of Minerva McGonagall, Dumbledore and Hagrid; but the one picture which caught Rose’s attention surprised her a little… she didn’t need to know who this was when she reached that page, but Sirius chose to say the name for her to be certain.

“That would be a picture of your aunt. Marlene.” Sirius’s voice was a soft whisper now. When she looked at him, she noticed the sad look in his eyes that he got when talking about James and Lily.  

Rose had recognized her simply because she remembered how her father used to always say that she looked very much like Marlene. And now she knew why; they had the same color eyes, lips and face shape. She was a beautiful woman, someone special to Sirius based on how much detail he had given to _her_ and less to the background. Before Rose could say something, the clock began to chime and Kreacher showed up, announcing that it was time for dinner… both Sirius and Rose silently agreed that they were ready and walked hand in hand together downstairs once a wave of his wand had cleared everything pristinely. This had been a productive, happy day and would continue to be so in the few weeks to come… until… Halloween.

 


	10. Chapter 9

_Silence. That's the first thing Sirius hears as soon as he steps inside what remained of Godric's Hollow; a loud and deafening silence. Cold is the feeling he experiences as his eyes wander over the destruction. Emptiness is something he thinks of as his feet drag themselves across the hallway to the staircase. Heartbreak is more than just a word when he sees…_

_"James!" Sirius cries out, falling to his knees; for a moment his heart stops, "No, no no no! James?" It feels like someone is tearing him apart from the inside out when he touches James's cheek and knows… he is too late. "No, please… no." This can't be happening, his heart is hammering loudly and the world is spinning… Sirius doesn't know what to do… what to think… he can't breathe, his throat is burning, his chest is hurting, his hands are shaking… James is gone._

_He's kneeling on the steps of the place he has called 'home' for as long as he can remember, cradling his best friend and squeezing his eyes shut as the tears begin to form. He does not know how much time has passed, all he knows is that he cannot and will not leave James here like this. There is a noise, in the midst of the silence; Sirius suddenly hears something from a distance… the sound of a baby crying… and he remembers that he is not alone anymore._

_"Harry." His godson is still here in the house, which means… "Lily!" Sirius cries out in the darkness. He needs to know where they are. He needs to see for himself._

_Before he moves however, Sirius spares a moment to close those hazel brown eyes and briefly kisses James's forehead. Making haste now, he runs upstairs, as fast as his tremblings legs can take him and when he reaches the nursery, his heart sinks again._

_"Oh, Lily…" He whispers softly when he sees her._

_She hadn't run, she hadn't taken Harry to safety, she hadn't left James alone. Sirius knew she wouldn't have, and once more he falls to the floor, only for a minute to brush away a lock of red hair from her face and kiss her forehead, closing her eyes._

_The cries are louder now, Harry is right there in his crib. As soon as Sirius stands up to see the little boy with tears in his eyes, he catches a glimpse of the scar; there is nothing else to think of but keeping him safe… but before he can lift the baby in his arms… Sirius suddenly feels everything going black all around him and someone is holding both of his hands, calling his name._

"Sirius? Sirius!" It was a girl's voice, someone he recognized and yet a name he can't quite place.

His eyes fluttered open and close almost immediately; it was far too bright for him… he wanted to… no... he  _needed_  to go back to the place where everything was dark, where there were no lights to pull him out of the shadows, away from James and Lily, he didn't want to leave them, he  _couldn't_  leave them behind. Still, this girl was persistent as she tugged his hands and Sirius was forced to face reality once again.

"Rose." He remembered now, remembered who she was and sighed deeply as he rubbed his forehead, trying to make the images go away.

"Sirius…" Rose said his name again, looking at him with big eyes, a little confused; she sensed something had changed, but she was not sure what it was just then.

"What is it?" His voice seemed different all of a sudden, and Rose didn't know how to place it, but if she knew about annoyance, that was probably what Sirius sounded like.

"Are you okay?" She asked him, standing there only a few feet away wondering what she can do to help.

"I'm fine. Do you need anything?" Sirius said, finally glancing up to see her staring at him in that way she always did whenever she was about to hug him or offer him chocolate to lift his spirits. It's the last thing he wanted in that moment; after another sleepless night and this… memory, he just needed to be alone.

"No, but…" Rose began to say something else, or perhaps ask him another pointless question, and so he interrupted her.

"But what Rose? I already told you I'm fine, and if you don't need me for anything then why don't you go and play with Buckbeak or something." He didn't need this right now; seeing Rose in front of him looking worried when she doesn't even  _know_  why he's the way he always is.

And when that thought enters his mind, Sirius had another second thought - how was it possible that even after this child had gone through loss herself and not just any loss, but the loss of her parents, there was still a smile on her face? There was also the fact that she had taken on the job, the responsibility, of doing everything in her power as a four year old to make  _him_  smile. Even when he didn't want to, when he didn't feel like it, when all he wants is to just be… alone.

"You are sad… was it a bad dream?" Despite herself, Rose can't help but try to help Sirius, not willing to just leave him the way he seemed now, looking tired and with dark circles under his eyes.

"A bad  _dream_?" Sirius let out a hollow laugh when he heard her say those words. "It was my worst nightmare haunting me as it has for the last fifteen years of my life! The most painful moment I've ever experienced, the night when I lost the only family I ever had who loved me more than my own flesh and blood. The last time I was ever happy. So no, Rose… it was  _not_  a bad dream." He closed his eyes again and took a deep breath, the images flashing like a blur in that second.

"I can help." Rose spoke softly, tilting her head to one side, not sure she understood everything he had just said but realizing the meaning behind his words.

"I don't need your help." He snapped automatically without thinking; the words are out of his mouth before he even realizes it and as soon as Rose heard him say that, she took a step back, clearly shocked and hurt by the icy tone of his voice.

Stunned by Sirius's behavior, this side of him that she hadn't seen before until this very moment, Rose didn't know what else to say. And so she simply nodded, knowing his eyes were focused on her and turned around to walk, not run, out of the study, leaving him to stare in disbelief as he was suddenly struck with the error of what he'd just said. Of all the people that he might ever get angry with, he  _knew_  that Rose would be the last person he would want to hurt… but he had… again; this time it felt worse than before and as soon as he comprehended everything, Sirius did stand up, intending to run after her and apologize… and yet… there was a moment of hesitation. It lasted a mere second, but it was enough for him to let Rose be for now.

"I need another drink." Muttering to himself, Sirius headed for the table where he'd left a bottle of mead and poured another glass before gulping it down and feeling the alcohol start to numb him once more.

That was when he glanced at everything else scattered there, and saw something that he had forgotten about - a few photo albums spread out across, some of them were open with people moving in and out of sight. One of those many albums were filled with pictures from a time when he knew he had been happy. The day that James and Lily got married; of course he had this entire collection here with him, that isn't surprising to Sirius… what was surprising to him is the fact that he seemed to be okay as a hand reached out to turn the pages, looking back at his younger self, not yet twenty years old and still full of life, happiness, laughter. He paused at a memorable picture, one of him with the bride and groom and Remus, just the four of them together at the wedding reception, laughing about something or the other James had probably said jokingly.

_"Ladies and Gentlemen! My fellow Witches and Wizards, it is my honor to welcome you all to the wedding reception of my two best mates, James and Lily, now known as Mr. and Mrs. Potter! I, Sirius Black, also known as the best man, will be your host for the night…"_

The memory ended abruptly as a crashing noise broke Sirius's concentration, and at first he thought that someone had fallen over the umbrella stand outside, but on feeling a stabbing pain in his hand and hearing no sound of his mother's yells, he glanced down to see that his glass has fallen to the floor as a result of him unknowingly breaking it while gripping it tightly; there was a cut on his palm which had already started to bleed and as he noticed this, he forgot to pick up the pieces, sensing that his nightmare was about to return.

A knock on the study door interrupted his thoughts, but Sirius didn't turn around to face Rose… he may have been ready to apologize but he was still not ready to face her.

"I thought I told you Rose, I don't want to talk right now." Sirius said as he pressed his wrist, trying to stop staring at the blood.

"Did something happen with you and Rose?" The voice that spoke up wasn't Rose's, but rather Tonks' who was standing by the doorway with her arms crossed, staring at her cousin with a look on her face he hadn't seen before.

"Dora! What… what are you doing here?" Spinning around at the sound of her voice, Sirius was surprised to see her there; he hadn't expecting anyone to come to the house today.

"Why don't you tell me what's going on with you first?" Tonks said to him, crossing over to where he stood and grabbed his hand, "What happened Sirius? Why are you bleeding and where's Rose?" She obviously was worried about him.

Still smarting from the outburst of anger he'd displayed towards Rose when he had snapped at her, Sirius didn't want to take that risk with Tonks and lash out unintentionally. He needed to be left alone, for their sakes more than his; and yet, Tonks wasn't about to just let Sirius push her away. Without waiting, she began to wrap his hand up.

"It's nothing, no need for you to worry." He replied at last, watching Tonks make quick work of his injury in moments.

" _Sirius_ …" That is all Tonks managed to say before he cut her off angrily, unable to stop himself.

"I don't need a babysitter Dora, I'm perfectly fine." Sirius's voice didn't sound loud but Tonks could hear the change in his tone.

"If you must know, I came here to babysit Rose." Tonks knew perfectly well why Sirius was acting like this which was why she let her last words remain unsaid,  _"And not you."_

"Well… she's probably in the library or with Buckbeak. Try her room if you can't find her." Sighing for a moment, Sirius used his uninjured hand to pinch his nose, hoping to block out the memories which were threatening to resurface again.

_Blood. That's the thing about magic and spells, they leave no physical signs of evidence behind; certainly not one of the Unforgivable Curses… except for Harry's scar… there was no blood anywhere in Godric's Hollow that night. It's a small mercy to know that James and Lily were not injured, even if doesn't help ease the pain._

"You don't know where she is do you?" Tonks' voice was soft now as her words pulled Sirius back to reality; she may have not known him for too long but if there was one thing Tonks understood about her cousin, it was his stubbornness, a trait that definitely ran in the family.

"I… I may have… snapped at her." Sirius finally admitted out loud, turning his gaze away from Tonks. He was not proud of what he'd done, "I didn't mean to… it just… I shouldn't have gotten mad."

"So apologize to her and explain everything, I know she'll understand." Touching his shoulder as a way of making him turn back to look at her, Tonks tried to reassure him, "This is a hard day for you and she deserves to know…"

" _What_? What does she deserve to know?" It was like a firework going off unexpectedly, as Sirius snapped again, "Tell me, do you think I should tell Rose about the time James and Lily were  _murdered_  by Voldemort? Or maybe I should tell her that I was framed for it and sent to Azkaban for twelve years? And what about the fact that I'm still a wanted fugitive who escaped and has been on the run for the last two years now? She's a  _child_  Dora, four years old… with no parents and no family of her own… she doesn't need more darkness in her life." Breathing heavily, he slowly sank into a chair and stared at his cousin who had listened to him without saying a word.

"You're right." Tonks said at last, something that Sirius hadn't expected to hear her say, "I know that Rose is still just a child, Sirius and she doesn't need to know about these things, not in detail, maybe not all of it… what I do know is that if you tell her something… you won't be spreading any darkness in her life, but maybe you might find some light in  _your_  life." She sat down next to him and met his gaze, "We both know how much Rose has changed you in these few months that she's been here she makes you smile, makes you laugh, you're even painting again. You need each other, and I think you know that."

Once all was said and done, Tonks knew it was time to leave Sirius to his thoughts; there was no need for her to say anything else. With a gentle reassuring squeeze on his knee, she gave him a small smile and went in search of Rose. It didn't take the young witch a long time to find the girl, as soon as she had headed towards the hallway, intending to check all the rooms if she had to, there was Rose, sitting on the steps. Tonks could see her looking a little sad, with both hands on her cheeks as she stared at the wall across.

"Hello Rose." Smiling brightly in the hopes that she would be surprised, Tonks promptly sat down beside the little girl and was instantly tackled by a hug.

"Dora!" Rose's features did brighten once she saw Tonks, it had been a while since their last meeting and Rose definitely was glad to have someone there with her now.

"Ooof! Someone's very happy to see me." Tonks said with a laugh as she hugged Rose back with equal fervor, "How are you Rose?"

"I'm okay." When she heard his question, Rose calmed down a little, the memory of what had happened with Sirius was still on her mind. "Sirius is sad." She added, knowing that telling Tonks was the right thing to do.

"I know, I just saw him." It was not Tonks' place to say anything to Rose about Sirius, but that didn't mean she couldn't cheer the girl up a little. "He's not having a good day, and I know that he got upset with you, but maybe if there was something that we could do for Sirius to make him feel better, that would be a good thing, wouldn't it?" She had absolutely no idea of how to go about doing so but Tonks figured it was worth a shot.

"Oh yes!" Rose exclaimed happily on hearing that suggestion, she may have been experiencing a weird feeling in her heart, but the thought of Tonks wanting to help Sirius as well was all she needed. "I know what to do."

There was a plan, a secret, something that Rose had been thinking about for quite some time now and she finally had a chance to share it with someone else. Someone like Tonks who would most likely be able to assist her in this… adventure of sorts. And so with her mind made up, Rose quickly explained her idea, whispering it in Tonks' ears even though there was no one around.

"Wow." Was the first reaction that Tonks had when she finished listening, "This is a beautiful idea Rose! I will definitely help you." She recalled telling Sirius only minutes ago that Rose was someone who could bring light back into his life and now, Tonks could see just how special she had proven to be.

"Let's go then." Jumping up to her feet, Rose pulled Tonks' hands and together, the two of them made their way upstairs in order to begin work on this new plan.

Meanwhile, back in the study, Sirius who had heard everything Tonks had said to him remained seated where he was, eyes focused on nothing in particular thinking about too many things at one time… he could still see the look on Rose's face after hearing his voice raised at her, he could not block out the nightmare completely either, but there was more… he also remembered the aftermath of what had happened when he had left Godric's Hollow and all of those memories were now playing on his mind… and he was  _not_  about to let that happen.

Quickly as he could, Sirius left the room in order to make his way towards the kitchen, hoping to find something stronger than plain old mead; the bright rays of sunlight streaming in through the windows seemed to be taunting him as he walked past the dining room, it seemed to be early afternoon, and for the first time, Sirius actually hoped that the day could have been dull and gloomy and possibly even rainy… but things never went how he wanted them to go… which meant he just had to brace himself and try to make it to the end of this day. However, just as he reached the main entrance, there was another surprise visitor standing in the corridor.

"Remus?" For a second, Sirius wondered if  _everyone_  was going to show up here all day long, but then he remembered something that Lupin had said to him the last time they'd spoken.

"Sirius." Lupin gave his a friend a nod as he took off his black jacket, seemingly a little somber, which was normal perhaps given the importance of the day.

"I thought that… weren't you supposed to…" Sirius started to say once Lupin had entered the house properly.

"Go to Godric's Hollow?" Finishing the other man's sentence, Lupin answered, "I've just come from there."

"Oh." Clearly he hadn't thought of that possibility, "I see." Sirius did feel glad to have Lupin around, he was the only other person who really knew what this day would be like.

"Did I miss something?" Lupin asked as he gestured to the bandaged hand which Sirius clearly had not even remembered.

"Not really, just a small cut. Broken glass. My fault, but Tonks took it upon herself to make sure I don't do anything stupid again." Shrugging as he answered, Sirius explained what had happened to him.

"Tonks is here? I thought she was going to be spending the day at home." Trying not to sound… shocked, Lupin hoped that his question sounded a little casual or curious.

"She wanted to spend time with Rose." Sirius said and began making his way towards the kitchen as was his plan.

"That's nice." Lupin did not need to know anything more to realize that something was troubling Sirius.

"Drink?" Taking out another glass from the cupboard, Sirius made the offer to his friend, knowing that Lupin had followed him without saying a word.

"Sure, I'll have one." The key, Lupin knew, to getting his friend to open up was time… and space; in his own time, Sirius would talk about it. Hopefully. Today of all the days was a difficult one, for both of them, but more so on Sirius and Lupin understood that.

With the drinks poured and a full bottle in hand ready for refilling at any time, both friends returned to the study; it was not too bright, given that the curtains had been drawn and Sirius sensed some sort of comfort there. Once they were seated in the armchairs by the unlit fireplace, a strange but peaceful silence fell between the two men… there was so much to say, so much they could say, so much they  _needed_  to say… but before that, this temporary respite was welcomed. It lasted for several long minutes during which Sirius and Lupin simply drank a glass of oak-matured mead respectively and when the time came for one of them to break the quiet around them, the result was surprisingly… amusing.

"What happened with Rose?"

"How was it going there?"

Both of them ended up speaking at the same time, asking their questions to the other and just for a second, Sirius felt the corners of his mouth tugging upwards… even if only a little… before waving his hand to Lupin.

"You first." He said to his friend, knowing that he would have to deal with this sooner rather than later, but Sirius was curious to ask how Lupin knew something had occurred between them. "What gave it away?"

"Apart from the fact that you mentioned Rose only once, indirectly in answer to my question about Tonks? I saw your face when you said her name; the last time you looked like that was the time Rose ran away from the house… and if she had done so again, you wouldn't be here right now… but something happened, am I right?" Lupin answered calmly, he had always been good at observing people, especially his own friends.

"Right." Sirius didn't know what else he could say after hearing such a detailed and accurate explanation, this was Remus Lupin after all; if he didn't know everything then no one did. "We might have… fought. Sort of. Not exactly… I may have yelled, or snapped at her. Said I didn't need her help." He said at last, running one hand through his hair as he spoke, that last bit was something he hadn't mentioned to Tonks.

"Ah, well that certainly explains it then." Leaning back in his armchair, Lupin could see how something like this might bother Sirius.

"Yeah. Tonks is with her now so…" That was a sign from Sirius indicating he didn't want to talk about this anymore and sure enough, he did change topics immediately, "How was it at… Godric's Hollow?"

"Good." Lupin knew better than to pursue the topic about Rose, not at the present moment at least and so he answered Sirius's question, "It was busy in the town square… everyone getting ready for Halloween. The memorial is still there, people leave flowers sometimes."

"Must be nice." Sirius said in reply to Lupin's comments, "Being able to go there whenever you wish."

"You haven't gone back?" Looking on this question later was when Lupin would realize things had escalated.

Sirius did not answer him immediately, the thought of going to Godric's Hollow after all these years seemed to be nothing more than a dream; truthfully however, Sirius knew why he had never returned and why he never could.

"No I haven't gone back there." He finally said, choosing not to dwell on these thoughts for too long. "I can't." This was spoken in a soft whisper, but Lupin still heard him.

"You  _can't_  go back to Godric's Hollow?" Lupin asked, "Or you  _won't_? Which one is it Sirius?" There was something about the way Sirius said those words which made Lupin feel like he was keeping something from him.

"I can't." Sirius repeated, without breaking eye contact as he spoke. "I'm locked up in my own house, how could I possibly go anywhere?" He stated the obvious.

"What about before this? After you… escaped… there was a chance wasn't there? Or last year?" Lupin wanted to know why  _he_  was the only one who had always gone to Godric's Hollow every single year for the last fourteen years.

"I couldn't." There was no way he could be talking about this right now, Sirius could already feel the thoughts starting to overwhelm him.

"Why not?" If anything, Lupin was persistent; he needed to know what Sirius was holding back.

 _"Because I was there!_ " Sirius was on his feet before he knew what was happening, his voice raised louder than it had ever been, "I was there that night! I was the one who found James and Lily… after… I saw everything… I was there." Of all the things he could have said, Sirius didn't even realize when this is what he had gone with, "Where were  _you_  Remus? Where were you on the night that your best friends were murdered?" All of the anger and pain and sadness and guilt were mixed together as they had been building up inside him for all this time.

"You know damn well where I was Sirius." Lupin was stunned when he heard those words, but he didn't back down, "Dumbledore had sent me away on a mission for the Order. I came as soon as I heard… I didn't know… I didn't know where you were… and by the time I reached back, they had already arrested you." And that was that; with everything out in the open at last, they both sat down.

The silence was different than it had been initially, how quickly things changed so drastically when emotions came into play; there was tension, palpable tension in the air between the two friends and yet there was also a sense of… them having gotten past a big obstacle. And unlike last time, Sirius was the only one who spoke first.

"We were going to leave." His voice was soft now, a little calmer but there was a faraway look in his eyes that could be seen.

"What?" Lupin didn't know what he expected to hear from Sirius, but certainly not that.

"The four of us… we were going to leave… go somewhere else, away from Godric's Hollow, away from everything." As he spoke up, elaborating on what he meant, Sirius finally met Lupin's gaze with a sad smile on his face.

"Where would you have gone?" Hearing Sirius confirm his thoughts, Lupin wondered how much else there was from that night he didn't know about.

"I didn't know, I don't think any of us knew. Lily agreed to it almost immediately, because if it meant keeping Harry safe… James, he… he was the stubborn one. He didn't want to run; said he would make a stand if it came down to that." Sirius sighed for a moment before continuing, "We had a fight the evening before, James and I, we agreed to disagree on what was best for the family… and I left, telling Lily that I'd come back the next night to talk some sense into James."

Sirius paused as he took a deep, shuddering breath; the memory of that argument coming back to him. As always, Lily had intervened to play mediator and helped them settle the discussion peacefully; if she hadn't… he would have left them on a sour note… but thanks to her, Sirius's last words to James were something he never regretted.

_"I love you, brother." Sirius says to James, standing at the doorway as he hugs his best friend and bids him goodnight._

"I would have gone to the end of the world to keep them all safe." He whispered more to himself than Lupin; forgetting for a second that his friend was sitting there. "I was supposed to be their Secret Keeper!" There it was, Sirius's reason behind everything he was feeling. A tiny, split second of an outburst on his part.

"I know." Lupin said, but he could tell that Sirius hadn't heard him, lost in his train of thoughts as he continued to speak.

"I knew there was something wrong that night, I had a bad feeling about… about  _him_ … and I went to his hiding place and he was gone." Sirius was caught in the memory of that night, not knowing he was talking aloud. "Whatever the plan was, I thought I could make it on time… get them out of the house before… but I was too late. I was too late. They were gone… James and Lily. I was meant to keep them safe."

Lupin, who had been listening to his friend all this time, without knowing what was there for him to say could feel the tears on his cheeks. And to his surprise, he noticed something in that moment he hadn't before… it wasn't the guilt Sirius had just confessed to; it was something much more shocking than that.

"I have to go talk to Rose." All of a sudden, as if just remembering what had happened with Rose, Sirius stood up from his chair, determined to face this now.

"Are you sure?" Lupin asked as he too stood, watching Sirius carefully and wondering if he had been mistaken.

"Yeah… I need to apologize, before it's too late." Sirius knew that this was what he had to do, making things right with Rose was only one step in the right direction.

He didn't know everything about where this was going to take him, but the more he thought about it, the more he knew James and Lily would have expected this much from him and he did owe Rose an explanation after his apology.

"Okay then." He wouldn't need to be there when they spoke to each other, but Lupin figured it wouldn't be a problem for him to go with Sirius to find out exactly where Rose was.

Fortunately for the two men, by the time they headed outside, Tonks accidentally bumped into Lupin for she hadn't known he or Sirius were leaving the study at the very same moment she had come there to find them. And luckily, Lupin had good reflexes to catch Tonks by the waist before she fell as he instinctively reached out to her. Neither one of them noticed Rose wasn't there by her side and they temporarily forgot Sirius stood not five feet away from the pair… until he cleared his throat.

"Dora, are you alright?" Sirius figured that Lupin probably didn't remember his own name in that moment.

"Huh? Oh… yes, yes I'm fine." Tonks was the first one to realize that she was still holding Lupin's shoulders and immediately stepped away, standing up properly now and turning a bright shade of red.

"Good. Have you seen Rose? She didn't come down with you?" He cut straight to the point, knowing that despite everything he had gone through this afternoon, there was a chance he could start making veiled references to what only  _he_  seemed to be noticing?

"She's upstairs, in the guest room where Hermione and Ginny were staying… we spent some time in the library together and then I came looking for you." Turning to face Sirius completely, Tonks was still acutely aware of the fact that Lupin stood just beside her.

"Is she… is she okay now?" Sirius had to ask Tonks, if he could gauge how her mood was before going up to see her, maybe that would help… or maybe it wouldn't… maybe he just wanted to know if she was okay.

"I know that she will be when you talk to her." Tonks said to him mysteriously, revealing no signs of what she meant by that.

"You're not going to give me anything else are you?" If he had to guess, Sirius would have realized that this was his cousin's subtle way of how she was reacting to what had happened between him and Rose; he also knew that he probably deserved this.

"No. I'm not." Now there was a hint of a smile from her, the mood was lighter and Tonks hoped it would stay this way.

"Alright, well… umm… the two of you are welcome to stay for dinner. If you want." Sirius made the offer to both Tonks and Lupin as he started to make his way upstairs, it was polite manners on the outside, but he also knew it would mean a lot to Rose if they had some company that night.

"Talk to Rose, we'll take care of dinner." Lupin finally spoke up, accepting Sirius's offer a little too quickly, before Tonks even had a chance to say something. It was only after he glanced back at her did he notice she had pursed her mouth shut and may have been biting her lower lip.

Sirius chose not to say anything to that but simply left Tonks and Lupin to it and headed for the guest room which had been Rose's room on the first night she had stayed in the house. He stopped outside the bedroom for a second, but instead of pausing to think, Sirius simply took a deep breath and knocked gently on the door before opening it slowly. Stepping inside, he didn't even need to glance around to find her… as soon as he had entered, he saw Rose sitting on the windowsill with her legs pulled up to her chest and her head resting to one side, away from him. She had not heard him knock nor had she sensed his presence; it gave Sirius a moment to gather his thoughts as he tried to choose his words carefully.

Just as he was about to take a step forward and call out to her, Sirius felt that hesitation again. Seeing Rose there, looking so small and yet so strong in her own way made his heart feel something he hadn't felt in a long time… and he was scared… not of these feelings… but of not being able to keep his promise from never hurting her. He knew that he didn't deserve Rose, someone with so much kindness and happiness and… she didn't deserve someone like him either, someone who only could remember what all these emotions were because of past memories, memories that were forever tinged with sadness, cold and dark, empty and dreadful, pain and anger, someone who was still haunted by nightmares and plagued with sleepless nights, Rose needed someone… who was not broken. And yet, as he stood there, watching her, the memory came back to him, the one which had made him jump out of his chair in the study.

_"We don't have to be related by blood to be family Sirius, you're one of us now and nothing will ever change that. We love you, just the way you are, so don't ever change." Lily says handing three month old Harry to him with a smile on her face as she goes into the kitchen and he knows she isn't just telling him this, she really means what she said. It is only when Harry starts to wail and howl loudly does Sirius realize that Lily's tricked him into changing the baby's diapers again._

Remembering those happy days brought a smile to his face and Sirius knew what he had to do; perhaps Rose had fallen asleep, and if she was, then he would take her back to their room and find another opportunity later, after dinner, to talk to her. Walking across to where she sat, he learned that she was wide awake, for as soon as he reached the windowsill and touched her head, Rose turned around immediately.

"Sirius?" Her voice was shaky and Sirius saw why the moment he knelt down in front of her; there were tears in her eyes.

"Rose? What is it love?" Sirius had not thought that he would find her crying and couldn't imagine why Tonks wouldn't have told him about this. "Are you alright?" He asked again, taking both of her hands in his and made her turn around to face him.

"I… I was thinking about my… my momma and daddy." Rose said in between sniffles, "I didn't mean to cry… Dora… Dora told me… you are sad because of Harry's momma and daddy… today… we were in the library… and I started to miss them." She explained herself slowly.

"Oh Rose." Seeing her like this tugged at Sirius's heart, he really shouldn't have yelled at her earlier, "It's okay to cry, you can always cry if you're missing your parents." He reached out a hand to her cheeks as he wiped away her tears before pulling her into his arms for a hug. "I'm sorry love, I am so sorry. I never meant to get mad at you earlier, and everything I said, I didn't mean it at all."

"I know." Head buried in the crook of his neck, Rose sounded a little soft-spoken but Sirius heard her clearly and moved back only enough for him to look into her eyes.

"Will you forgive me?" He asked her.

"Yes I do." Rose didn't need to say the words, she wanted to say that she was never angry at him but there was a part of her which knew that Sirius wanted to hear the words. And maybe Tonks had mentioned something along those lines to her before.

"What is it Rose?" Sirius could sense that there was something more she wanted to say to him, and so he reached out to take her hand again and squeezed it gently.

"I wanted to say…" She paused, looking at him with her big brown eyes, unsure of how to go on, "I… I love you, Sirius." The words stumbled out of their own accord, suddenly, unexpectedly, randomly, for no apparent reason now, but that's how it happened.

Sirius heard the words loud and clear, knowing somewhere in the back of his mind that the usual response to something like this was to repeat the words… but if he had been able to stun Rose into silence earlier, she certainly was capable of doing the same to him. He could feel his lips parting open as if to say something, to acknowledge that he had heard her, and yet what he  _did_  manage to say was probably not what Rose wanted to hear from him.

"I was wrong." Sirius started off abruptly, knowing Rose was watching him, "I said that I didn't need your help, but I was wrong…" He was picking at the threads until he stopped and looked at her when he continued, this was something he had to say face to face, "I do need your help Rose; I need to see your smile every day, I need to hear your laughter, I need your hugs, I need your chocolates, I need your support when I'm having a bad day… but more than any of that… I need  _you_."

Everything stilled for a moment once more after he stopped talking, falling silent as he stared into her eyes; he had bared his heart to her, it wasn't the words he had hoped to use… it was funny, him being able to call Rose by the name of 'love' but he couldn't tell her… he did know how to feel that emotion as well. And when she simply sat down herself to hug him without saying anything, Sirius couldn't help but smile… for the first time properly since that day had started; and thought to himself, maybe one day, someday he would find the courage to say the words back… that he did love her too.


	11. Chapter 10

16th November. It was supposed to be a day like any other - ordinary, mundane, boring and routine; but ever since Rose had come into Sirius’s life, he realized that if there ever came an important day, she would do her best to make it special. There was also the fact of his cousin to be taken into consideration, because together, Rose _and_ Tonks were quite a determined pair. And if they wanted to make sure he celebrated his birthday then that was what would happen. Yes, today was his 36th birthday and as his protests over a ‘party’ went ignored, Sirius had no choice but to sit back and let the women work, mostly because that was an order directly from Rose herself.

_“It is your birthday Sirius, you need to rest for the party.”_ Rose had said to him when he’d given in and let her organize a small gathering here at the house that evening; but also basically refusing him to help either.

This left Sirius with the entire afternoon free, once Tonks had also reiterated Rose’s words to him on her arrival, he figured it was best to stay out of their way. Since Lupin was running late as well, the only other thing for him to do seemed to be more painting, and Sirius had the perfect subject in mind. Once he had grabbed a tall glass of Pumpkin Juice from the kitchen, earning several loud yells from Rose and Tonks who scrambled to hide their preparations, he apologized to them and headed to Buckbeak’s room; his pet Hippogriff was a challenge for him and ever since he had lessened his drinking, Sirius discovered it definitely helped with his drawing. For the next several hours, his mind was at ease while focused completely on sketching and down below, the entire ground floor was soon converted into a simple but elegantly styled party area.

“Well, I think that’s that!” Tonks exclaimed as she dusted her hands, taking a good look around the dining room which had been the last place for her to decorate, after the hallway, the study and the library, “What do you think Rose?” She glanced at her loyal helper who definitely deserved credit for all the work she’d done.

“It’s very lovely.” Rose said as she turned in a full circle to admire their handiwork, “It’s perfect and I think Sirius will like it.” She knew that he wasn’t very excited to have a party being held for him, but she also knew that too many years had gone by since his last celebration and thought it would be nice for all the Order members to meet up and have a good time together.

“I think he will.” Nodding in agreement, Tonks suddenly let out a gasp as she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. “Oh no, no no no!” She stared at her mousy brown hair and realization hit in that exact moment.

“Dora? What is wrong?” Something must have happened in the last minute for Tonks to look so worried but Rose couldn’t think of any reasons behind it.

“We forgot the cake!” Tonks whispered, covering her mouth with both hands and hanging her head, “I cannot believe that I didn’t remember.” It was true, between all the cooking and decorating and cleaning, neither she nor Rose had found time to bake a cake for Sirius.

“Oh no.” Rose’s face fell too, but was there no way to fix this in time? “Is it too late now?” She asked Tonks, hoping the older woman would have something positive.

“There’s an hour left before all the guests start arriving and even with magic on our side, I’m not sure if that’s enough time.” This was her cousin’s birthday cake after all, Tonks didn’t just want to magic it into something rushed, but what else could she do?

“And we have to get ready.” Rose said, looking down at her clothes and saw it wouldn’t do.

“Not to mention we have to make sure the birthday boy is ready for his own party too.” Tonks said with a sigh, evidently there was more left for them to finish than they had anticipated.

Standing there in the middle of the hallway, neither Rose nor Tonks noticed when the main door opened to admit an early guest. They were both thinking of at least trying to get started on the cake and not mention it to anyone until the last minute possible, since Sirius wouldn’t even cut it after dinner which would give them more time; but there was someone else who could help.

“Good evening Rose, Tonks.” Lupin’s voice suddenly spoke up as he greeted them both.

“Remus!” Rose exclaimed happily as she hugged him tight on seeing that he was here already. “What are you doing here now?” She asked.

“Well, I came a little early to see how preparations were going…” He started to tell Rose when he noticed the look on Tonks’ face, “Is everything alright?” Lupin hadn’t seen her looking so crestfallen until now and wondered what could have happened, but he had already made his mind up to do whatever it was to help her and Rose.

“We forgot to make a cake for Sirius.” Knowing that Tonks was upset with herself, Rose answered the question, “And there’s not enough time now.” She added, feeling equally sad; this was supposed to be a day when Sirius could be happy, but without a cake she didn’t know what would happen next.

“Why isn’t there enough time?” He checked the time and saw how close they would be cutting it if they started, but Lupin wasn’t backing down, “Is everything else ready Tonks?” Reaching out to touch her arm, he saw her turn to stare at him.

“Yes… yes everything else is ready for the party; we just have to change and get Sirius down on time, but…” Tonks began and then paused, long enough to guess what Lupin was thinking, “You’re not going to make a cake are you?” She asked him.

“Of course I am. And I’ll have Rose to help me.” Grinning as he left his coat and gift-wrapped present for Sirius safely on one side, Lupin rolled up his shirtsleeves and offered one hand to his newly appointed baking assistant.

“We are making a cake?” Rose questioned, as she took Lupin’s hand in hers, “What about the time?”

“We’ll get it done.” Lupin reassured her before turning to Tonks, “You’re the hostess for this evening, go and get changed, take care of Sirius and be here when the others arrive. I promise the cake will be ready on time and no one will know otherwise.” He said with a smile on his face, this was something he could do for Sirius and for Tonks as well.

“Thank you Remus!” Unable to stop herself, in that moment of relief, Tonks sprung a kiss on his cheek, leaving him a little flustered as she ran upstairs before he could say anything else.

Rose was the one who had noticed this exchange between them and even after Tonks had left, she could see how Lupin continued to stare in wonder, one hand on his cheek, the other still holding her and only when she tugged it did he remember she was still here and they had work to do. Chuckling softly to himself, she saw that he didn’t speak but walked with her towards the kitchen and began their preparations. Lupin got his wand out and within minutes had gotten all the ingredients needed for a cake ready, but when he looked around for Rose and found her sitting on the chair by the table, he was surprised.

“What are you doing all the way over there Rose?” Walking over to her, he knelt down and realized that she seemed a little shy; it was true that he hadn’t spent a lot of time with her, when it was just the two of them, but perhaps this opportunity could change things.

“I don’t know what to do.” Rose admitted softly, “Dora told me to put the flowers and the ribbons but I did not touch the food.” In all honesty, she had expected to sit quietly and watch Lupin work.

“Oh… I see… well that is something I would’ve done with the dinner too, but this is Sirius’s birthday cake. I could use your help.” Lupin knew what it was that he needed Rose to do.

“Okay!” Smiling up at him, Rose slid from her chair and went to where Lupin had gathered everything.

“May I?” He asked her, setting his wand aside for the moment, Lupin held his arms out and when Rose nodded, he lifted her up and sat her down atop the marble where she could see all the different bowls and spoons and packages of flour, cocoa powder, eggs, sugar and icing lay.

“What now?” Rose was curious to know how she could be of help to Lupin.

“Now, we get started before time runs out.” Lupin said to her, “I’ll need your help the most at the end when it’s time for the icing, but right now, you could talk to me while I speed things up; that really would help.” He had seen the clock and realized every second that passed by was crucial.

Baking a cake wasn’t as easy as waving a wand around and dumping all the ingredients together, sticking it in the oven and fast-forwarding the process to mere minutes; not to mention that Lupin hadn’t really done this in a while. He knew that measuring was key and instincts, both needed to work well together and so he began, trusting Rose to keep him on task while talking… to him, it was never a distraction but rather a way of focusing. Still, even someone as clever as he didn’t quite expect the first words out of Rose’s mouth.

“You love Dora.” She said, going for the first thing that came to her mind; she was a little caught up in seeing how magic was working, everything moving in the middle of the air on their own, being carefully measured and poured into one big dish which would be transferred into a baking pan.

“Sorry?” Lupin was busy cracking the eggs over a bowl but had heard Rose’s _statement_ , not question, loud and clearly.

“She kissed you.” Rose didn’t repeat her initial assessment of what she thought but went on talking, “I was there.” She added, her gaze transfixed on the movements more than anything; it all seemed to be in a single file.

“Well yes… but… but that doesn’t mean anything of course.” He replied at last, knowing that Rose was sitting not five feet to his right even now, “Tonks has kissed Sirius too.” Of course he didn’t mention the fact that perhaps _that_ had been because…

“You look at her like my daddy used to look at my momma.” The chocolate was being added now and Rose’s eyes were wide open, “Sirius does not look at Dora the same.” Rose had always been very observant, more so during the last several weeks. She didn’t know when there was a certain moment which told her that Lupin liked Tonks, but she could see it now after the kiss.

“I… it’s… it’s complicated Rose.” Lupin said, “Grown up people have a lot of things in their lives to consider and there’s factors like age and status to think about and the other person’s feelings and many, _many_ more problems. Love is not simple.” He sighed and watched as his wand poured the batter in.

“What problems?” Rose hadn’t understood much of what Lupin had told her but the word ‘problems’ made sense to her.

“Some things which aren’t easy for someone so young to understand.” He gave her a smile and went to the oven at last, “Maybe one day when you’re a little older.” There was plenty of time for the cake to be baked.

“Things like… you are… a wolf…?” Her words were drawn out carefully as she stared into his eyes, watching the reaction.

“How do you know about that?” Lupin asked her, walking closer to where she sat, the answer coming to him almost immediately. “Sirius. He told you.” There was no one else who would have.

Rose didn’t say anything but slowly nodded her head, just once in reply; something about the way Lupin had suddenly changed made her think that maybe she wasn’t supposed to have said what she had. Now that he was in front of her, he asked one simple question.

“Are you scared?” He wasn’t _trying_ to scare her, but now that she knew the truth, he had to make sure she understood just how serious this condition of his was.

“No.” Rose didn’t need time to think of an answer; she had never felt anything but safe around Lupin in all the time she’d known him.

“You should be. I’m a werewolf.” Lupin said, “It is not a pleasant sight to see and it is dangerous.” There was a part of him which wondered if he seemed to be playing out a scenario where someone else would be involved.

“Not now.” She pointed out, knowing that a wolf was a big furry animal and Lupin looked human just then.

“True, and I stay away when I turn every full moon.” He told her; there was nothing reckless in his behavior, he knew how to protect others from himself when he changed.

“I’m not scared.” Rose said to him even more adamantly now.

“I could hurt the people I love.” Lupin had thought of every possible argument he could come up with.

“You won’t.” This time, as if to prove her point, Rose stood up on the counter and placed both her hands on Lupin’s cheeks, holding his gaze there.

“You don’t know that.” He said softly, thinking that maybe he was inadvertently trying to push her away too.

“I do. I know you. You are good and nice and you won’t ever hurt me and you won’t hurt Dora.” Rose spoke in a whisper but still smiled after she had finished telling Lupin the same thing one more time.

Hearing the conviction in her voice, someone who was only a child and yet still had so much faith in him, after having met only a few months ago, it made Lupin waver… ever so slightly… he began to feel as if there was… hope. How was it that Rose had managed to make him think like this?

“Thank you Rose.” Lupin smiled at last and hugged her, this was a special girl and he could see why Sirius had changed; Rose was a positive influence on him.

“You’re welcome… Moony.” There was a cheeky grin on her face as she used his Marauders nickname.

“Ha. You know about that too, of course you do.” Laughing at that, Lupin kissed the top of her forehead, she had a gift of being able to make _anyone_ smile and it definitely was more magical than anything else he had ever seen in his life.

“Yes I do.” Rose nodded her head, she and Lupin heard the oven alarm going off in that very moment signaling the cake was ready.

“The cake! We have to still put the finishing touches, the icing and the writing.” Lupin had prepared the chocolate icing in a bowl which sat on Rose’s lap now; it was almost time for the party to begin.

“Oh! Look!” Pointing to the doorway, Rose saw that Tonks and Sirius were making their way downstairs. She took the opportunity to quickly take one lick of chocolate from a spoon when Lupin turned around to see where she had seen them.

Surely enough, there they were. Hand in hand, Tonks was dragging Sirius down the staircase and Lupin could hear her laughter echoing through to the kitchen; the two of them seemingly having a jolly good time given how they appeared to be, even from a distance… he could see… no, there was no point in trying to think about that now. 

“We should get the cake ready now, Rose; you still have to go and change.” He moved back to where Rose was and gave her his full attention. Tonks was keeping Sirius out of the kitchen by showing him around, looking at the decorations.

“I will finish the icing first.” Rose said as she picked up the bowl and spoon.

“Alright, let’s do this.” Lupin retrieved the cake from inside the oven, this time he used mittens and his own hands, not wanting to leave something so important to a wand.

It took Lupin and Rose only a few minutes to get the cake covered in icing, but once he started to write the message on top, he sent her outside. Tonks would help her get changed into party clothes and there was a couple of seconds for him to finish this off before Sirius joined him. The cake was to be kept in the fridge until dessert time and that meant Sirius couldn’t see it beforehand. Once he had completed his task, Lupin left the kitchen and met his friend halfway, steering him clear of that area; they relocated to the study for a glass of Elderflower Wine.

“Are you going to tell me what you were doing in the kitchen Moony?” Sirius asked his best friend; it wasn’t lost on him that together, Lupin, Tonks and Rose had planned something for his birthday.

“Not really no.” Answering with a grin, Lupin chose to keep his cake adventures with Rose a secret, “I was just lending a helping hand to the ladies.” He said as a way of replying to the question without revealing any details.

Just then, the main doors opened of their own accord to admit everyone else who had shown up at the same time - Molly and Arthur along with Kingsley, each of them bearing birthday gifts! Not a few seconds later, Tonks showed up with Rose as they came downstairs and within seconds, there was a flurry of activity as birthday wishes were bestowed upon Sirius and greetings exchanged among the guests. It was also not lost on the hostess of the evening that they were one guest short.

“Where’s Mad-Eye?” Tonks said to Kingsley and Arthur, wondering where the Auror was.

“He is delayed.” Kingsley answered her, “I do know that he will be here though; Alastor made sure I reassured you that he _will_ be here Tonks.” He added with a smile. If there was anyone who could get Mad-Eye to attend a gathering like this, it was Tonks.  

“Leave it to Mad-Eye to be busy with work even on a day like this!” She tried not to sound too upset but she had wanted everyone to be here for Sirius’s birthday party, “Who knows what he’s even up to.” In that moment of emotion, Tonks didn’t even realize when her hair changed from lavender to flaming red.

“I’m sure it’s something important that couldn’t be put off until later.” Arthur said, “But he’ll be here soon.” He placed a hand on the young witch’s shoulder and calmed her down, as her hair color reverted again.

“You didn’t hear it from me, but I have it on good authority that Mad-Eye may be on his way back from Azkaban as we speak.” Lowering his voice to a whisper, Kingsley stood close to Sirius and Lupin, who heard him but chose not to react; this was a delicate situation which needed to be discussed more privately.

Luckily Molly was busy talking to Rose, learning about how she and Tonks had arranged this whole evening together, and with Tonks talking to Arthur, which meant that no one else heard this conversation.

“Well let’s not just stand here all night long!” Tonks exclaimed as she started to usher everyone inside the house, “The party has officially begun.” And this was the moment for her to bring Sirius into the spotlight. “C’mon birthday boy! This is your night.”

“Whatever you say cousin.” Sirius said to her, knowing there was no point in trying to shy away from the attention, as long as he had Rose by his side maybe things would be pleasant and even enjoyable.

Beaming brightly, Tonks led him and the other guests into the dining room which was the main party area; she and Rose had decorated it very elegantly - there were tiny fairy lights strung across the walls casting a glow all around, very few red and gold balloons signifying the Gryffindor House colors, black silk ribbons tied on the chairs, fresh flowers placed in vases, the dining table was set with silver from the Black family collection and all of the food had been laid out with little help from Kreacher who had presumably retreated away to the basement as he always did. Tonks seated Sirius at the head of the table, Rose on his right side with Molly and Arthur seated beside her, Lupin was on his left side with Kingsley and an empty chair for Mad-Eye which left her to sit directly across from him. Dinner was a merry affair; once the drinks were passed around, and juice for Rose, Sirius eventually loosened up and spent the evening recounting memories of his school days as well as cracking jokes with Lupin’s help, laughing and smiling the most he had in a very long time. It turned out that this birthday celebration was definitely a good idea. Mad-Eye _did_ eventually show up just before dessert and to the surprise of everyone, he even hugged Sirius for a brief second.

“Happy Birthday, boy.” His voice was still gruff as usual but he seemed to be in good spirits himself for he had brought a present too.

“Thanks Mad-Eye.” Sirius said as he clapped the older man on the shoulder, making sure that Moody had a drink when he sat down to eat and resumed their storytelling.

Once the food and drinks had been consumed, there remained only two important things for the night; cutting the cake and opening all of the gifts. To Sirius’s immense delight, when Lupin disappeared to the kitchen for a second, returning with the Birthday cake, he was surprised to see the design - a dog face complete with floppy ears and a wagging tongue. And on learning that Rose had helped, with the idea and the icing, Sirius pulled her in for a hug and asked for her to help him blow out all the candles. The first bite was her honor and within a quarter of an hour, they all retired to the den for Sirius to go through each and every gift he’d received that night; Molly and Arthur presented him with a joint special gift of vinyl records, specifically of Muggle music which Sirius appreciated, Kingsley had an antique silver pocket watch to replace the one Sirius had lost, Mad-Eye being Mad-Eye gave him a foe glass, Tonks’ gift was an unlimited supply of sweets and chocolates from Honeydukes, a very thoughtful gesture… but it was Lupin’s present which happened to be the first of his surprises. A small wooden box which revealed…

“Is this… the real thing?” Sirius was wide eyed as he lifted a golden snitch in his hands, turning it around carefully, having recognized it instantly.

“It is.” Lupin said to him, watching as his friend noticed the most important detail of all.

“ _J.P._ I’d forgotten that he had signed this silly old thing.” He whispered; this wasn’t just any snitch, it was the exact same one which James had nicked for himself after Gryffindor had won their first House Cup and played with it all the time; at some point he had scratched his initials on the surface permanently.

“Thought you might like that.” Was all Lupin would say, he had found it a little while ago and had been waiting for the right opportunity to give it to Sirius.

“Thank you Moony.” Embracing him, Sirius felt as if a part of James was with him now and would be there all along.

Soon number 12 Grimmauld Place was silent once again; after this rare evening of celebrations, things had gone back to the usual way of life. The lights were dimmed, the curtains closed and the guests had said goodbye as they left for the night. As for Rose, she found that despite enjoying herself, meeting almost everyone and even seeing a constant smile on Sirius's face, she was oddly relaxed at the quietness all around the house... she would dare to also admit that it was... peaceful. And as she headed upstairs towards Buckbeak’s room, Rose hoped that the rest of this night would continue to be special in its own way.

"Hello?" Pushing the room door open, Rose stepped in, looking around and seeing Buckbeak was still awake.

She didn't see Sirius anywhere at first, he had gone upstairs to leave his presents, but the Hippogriff seemed to know just exactly what Rose was thinking of because a second later, she noticed him raise his head and turn slightly in the direction of the window. After that, Buckbeak settled down to sleep.

“Thank you Beaky!” Rose grinned as she walked past him and patted his wing softly; behind where he slept as the balcony and sure enough, when she peeked her head outside, Sirius was sitting there.

The balcony was a small area of space that the french doors opened out to, with a single old chair placed there in the middle for someone to sit and watch how the world moved on below, or perhaps stare at the sky up above. Rose was barefoot as she wordlessly stepped on the cold granite floor, shivering a little and tiptoed over to where Sirius had relocated to after the party had finished. It certainly didn’t surprise her to realize that he wanted some alone time after everything was said and done. They weren’t entirely alone of course; apart from Buckbeak who decided to turn in for the night, Sirius and Rose had a new gift to keep them company - James’s old snitch was currently zooming around the balcony, bumping into the walls every now and then, but still kept flying.

“Hello, love.” He didn’t even have to turn around for him to realize that Rose stood only a few feet behind.

“How did you know it was me?” She asked him, stopping by the armrest of the chair and looked up at Sirius, more in awe that he had sensed her than anything else.

“Do you know of anyone else who lives here besides you and me?” Sirius countered with a question of his own, there was a shadow of a smile on his face but he did seem happy to see Rose. After all, it was just the two of them now; as it always was going to be.

“No. But… I didn’t know you could see me.” Rose admitted as she sighed, the surprise didn’t turn out the way she had planned, but not all of it was ruined.

“I didn’t see you.” He started to say, pausing to lift Rose up in his arms and set her down on his lap, “I did however, _hear_ you come in.”

It was a simple explanation and Rose felt impressed to know that she had been able to sneak out here without being seen; it meant that the next time, she would have to only work on not being heard. Grinning to herself, Rose remembered why she had come to see Sirius in the first place.

“I have… something for you…” She started to say, finally bringing the small bag up from her hands which she was carrying.

“Oh? What is it?” His curiosity was raised now, Sirius did remember Rose whispering an apology to him earlier when they were all gathered downstairs, about her not having anything for his birthday gift. And yet, this bag seemed to indicate otherwise.

“A present.” Rose knew how it sounded; in all honesty, she had been preparing for this moment ever since she’d found what she planned to give him on his birthday. Everything was ready - the gift, the paper wrapping, the card… only, at the last minute, Rose ended up hiding it in her room. Until now.

“May I see what my present is?” Sirius asked, holding a hand out for the bag.

“I… I did not buy it.” She turned around to look at Sirius when she spoke, her brown eyes wide open and seemingly… worried? “I did not make it too.” Was the second thing she confessed. “Only the card.”

In response to her admission, Sirius broke into a smile; this was one of the things about Rose that he had come to admire over time - her sincere honesty about everything. A quality which may have begun to rub off on him too.

“That’s quite alright love, I’m sure I’ll love your gift, no matter what.” And it was certainly true, he hadn’t expected gifts from anyone but as of a few hours ago, Sirius now had plenty of things.

“Okay.” Nodding her head, she relented at last and passed the gift over to Sirius who smiled and took it from her hands. His second surprise of the night.

For a few seconds, the two of them didn’t say anything; Rose simply watched as Sirius carefully opened the bag, removed the gift as well as the birthday card. He grinned when he saw that she had drawn a likeness of the two of them with Buckbeak with _‘Happy Birthday Sirius, Love Rose!’_ written inside and after thanking her for this, he moved on to his present and started to unwrap it. Rose waited with bated breaths, sitting on his knee, hoping that he would like the object in question.

“Dora helped me… to find this.” Rose said as an explanation once Sirius had reached the last layer of wrapping paper.

“Really? Well let’s see what this is, shall we?” Sirius already knew what kind of a gift it was, he just didn’t know the exact details.

As soon as he removed that last piece of paper and turned it over in his hands, Sirius was quiet for a minute. The gift was a book… but not just any book, it was ‘ _The Golden Book of Fairytales_ ’ and if memory served, this was the exact copy which had been gifted to him on his 16th birthday… by Lily Evans. After pestering him for months and months, Sirius had given up and agreed to let her buy him something Muggle related which he promised to use; this book was the result. And he had kept his promise to her, in spite of all the jokes that James had cracked, he did read the book from beginning to end, page by page, story by story, and the happy hugs that Lily had given him afterwards were something that Sirius still remembered vividly.

Rose could see him going through all kinds of emotions in that moment, she didn’t understand all of them but 'happy' and 'sad' were two things she did see. The look on Sirius's face made her wonder if giving him this book was the right thing to have done?

“You don't like it.” She suddenly blurted out, bringing him out of his reverie.

“Why would you say that love?” Sirius was confused at her words; glancing in Rose’s direction, he saw that she seemed disheartened.

"Because..." Rose began as she reached a hand to his cheek and wiped away an unshed tear, “You look sad now.”

“Oh. No, no… not at all, I’m not sad.” He understood what she meant now, “I am so happy that you found this book for me. I thought that I would never see it again; this is something very special to my heart and I will cherish it forever.” Sirius said to her.

Hearing his words brightened Rose’s mood as she smiled and threw her arms around him for an impulsive spur-of-the-moment hug.

“Thank you Rose.” His voice was a soft whisper, he kissed her on the cheek and leaned back in his chair. It had taken twenty years, he didn’t know exactly when he had lost the book, but now he had found it again; something for him to remember Lily by.

For the rest of that night, Sirius showed Rose all of the stars which were clearly visible to their eyes in the sky above them; he named all of the constellations, telling her that most of his family members had the same names - Orion, Andromeda, Cygnus, Cassiopeia. She was nestled comfortably in his arms, her back against his chest and even though there were moments when Sirius thought she may be drifting off to sleep, Rose didn’t want to turn in just yet.

“Is there a rose star?” Rose asked him, covering her mouth after yawning again; she had lost count after the first ten times, her eyes were closing, but she was curious to know if she too was named after a star.

“No, I don’t think so.” Sirius began to say, “I do know that there is a rose galaxy located far away in the Andromeda constellation; and if you ask me, that is better than having just a star to your name. You could fit hundreds of thousands stars inside a single galaxy which makes it special. Just like you love.”

“That is nice.” She sighed deeply, and closed her eyes, “Happy Birthday Sirius.” It was something she managed to say before sleeping at last.

“Thank you for the best birthday ever.” Kissing her forehead, Sirius carefully picked Rose up in his arms and carried her to their room; he made sure that she was tucked in properly before settling in by her side, leaving a tiny light on for the two of them. “Goodnight love.” He whispered, wrapping an arm around her waist and fell into a nightmare free sleep.


	12. Chapter 11

"Do grown up people cry when they are sad?" It was an innocent question that Rose suddenly asked as she glanced at both Lupin and Tonks who were sitting with her by the fireplace.

"Ah... that is a good question Rose." Lupin said after his initial surprise passed, not completely sure why she had brought it up now.

The whole of Grimmauld Place was bustling for the first time since that summer; it was holiday season once more now that Christmas had arrived. And though things had been a little somber given the atmosphere after Arthur's attack at the Ministry, tonight was Christmas, which gave everyone a chance to celebrate; together, they had managed to transform the house complete with decorations all around - the chandeliers were covered in garlands of holly, gold and silver streamers, magical snow glittered in heaps over the carpets, a great big Christmas tree, obtained by Mundungus was decorated with live fairies, red and green stockings hung above the fireplace and even the stuffed elf heads on the hall wall wore Father Christmas hats and beards! After a delicious feast that Molly had prepared for them all, they'd retired to the study for dessert. Rose had spent most of the evening with Sirius who seemed to be filled with the Christmas spirit, for she witnessed firsthand a rare moment of him singing carols that afternoon, something which sounded like, ‘ _God Rest Ye Merry Hippogriffs_ ’ to her.

“Why do you ask?” Tonks spoke up, exchanging a look with Lupin and maybe for a moment they did know where this question had come from.

“Sirius.” Rose said simply as she kept her gaze fixed on him, finally voicing her thoughts out loud after _months_ of pondering.

Across the room, Sirius was talking to Harry, Ron and Hermione about something; they and the others had gone to visit Arthur at St. Mungo’s that afternoon again. Rose remembered how the Weasley’s had all shown up a few nights ago after Harry had told them about the attack. It was frightening to say the least since everyone had been so tense, she even moved to sleep with Ginny until Hermione had arrived. But all throughout, her focus never wavered from Sirius. He was better now… but still… seemed a little sad.

“What about Sirius?” Following the little girl’s gaze, Lupin realized that she too may have picked up on something he had noticed several weeks ago.

“He doesn’t cry.” She answered him and turned to focus her attention on both the adults sitting in front of her, “I don’t know when he did cry. Do you know Moony?” Rose asked in return, hoping that maybe he would have an answer for her.

Now that the house was full again and Harry had returned, Sirius was in good spirits; she could see only faint twinges of sadness reflected in those grey eyes, but never once had she actually seen him _cry_. There was a moment when Rose thought she saw tears on his cheeks, just that morning, but it had been more a result of Sirius laughing so much until his sides hurt… not in a mocking way of course… Harry’s gift to him, a combination of a late birthday present and a Christmas present, which turned out to be a black leather biker jacket. Something which Sirius told her was very thoughtful of his Godson as it reminded him of his days at Hogwarts; and even though he probably couldn’t pull off the look anymore, he still wore the jacket all day long.

“Well now that you mention it, I don’t think I do know.” Lupin said truthfully; his mind returned to the day of Halloween and how _he_ had teared up, but not Sirius. The more he thought about it, he realized there was a good chance in these last two or three years since he’d been reunited with his best friend, Sirius had not cried even once. “No, he hasn’t cried at all.”

“Not once?” Tonks was surprised to hear that as she finally began to understand the importance of this and why Rose seemed worried.

“I saw one tear… at night after his party, when I gave him Lily’s book.” Rose shook her head and began to tell her side of things to the two of them, “Many months back, when Sirius read me a letter from my daddy, I did cry… and he told me… it was ten days later.” In her heart, she knew that the shock of losing her parents had kept her from crying, but where it had taken her _days_ to finally cry and start to feel better, Sirius had lost James and Lily very many years ago.

“Oh Rose…” Reaching out to squeeze her hand, Tonks turned to look at her cousin and saw a smile on his face, a smile that this girl had brought to his face. “What can we do Remus?” She asked the man sitting by her side, his hands folded as he thought about this… surely there was something… anything… to do.

“He’s not in shock anymore, that much we know.” Lupin began to say as he tried to rationalize what the facts were, “He _has_ accepted what happened to James and Lily… but he hasn’t mourned them. Not properly. And if he doesn’t cry, then I don’t think he’ll truly be able to heal.” It was the only thing which made sense.

Sitting there, with her gaze focused on Sirius and this new information that she had just learned, Rose wondered what was there for her to do; surely with Lupin and Tonks, the three of them would be able to figure out something.

“We make him cry.” Rose said just then; it was the obvious answer really.

“That… might actually work.” Lupin replied almost immediately as he looked over at his friend who was deep in discussion with Harry… luckily no one else was close by to hear what Rose had said.

“Ye… wait. What?” Tonks exclaimed softly when she processed the words, “You want to _make_ Sirius cry?” She repeated, eyes widening at the thought.

“Yes.” Nodding her head, Rose turned to Lupin once more.

“It makes sense if you think about it.” He explained to Tonks, even though the idea of doing something like this wasn’t his first thought.

“ _When_ do we do this? Now? It’s… today’s Christmas!” As she thought about it a little, Tonks realized maybe this was the only way.

“We might not get another chance like this.” Lupin said, and then addressed Rose, “If this works then that’s good, but if not…” He trailed off.

“And how are we going to do it?” Tonks couldn’t imagine doing something on purpose to make Sirius cry and yet, it did sound… logical. A bit crazy, but logical.

“Lily.” Rose didn’t need to think of that answer; ever since she had seen Sirius almost crying that night of his party, because of Lily, it was possibly the one thing which would help them… help him.

The three of them realized how this idea of theirs sounded out loud. It was Christmas night and with _everyone_ gathered there, perhaps… no… the sooner they attempted this the better it would be… and since they were all in agreement over what needed to be done, the only thing missing now was Sirius himself. Fortunately for Rose, Lupin and Tonks, almost as if the universe _wanted_ them to go ahead with the plan, the subject of their discussion promptly sat down beside Rose merely a few minutes after they’d fallen silent.

“There you are love, I was wondering where you’d gone off to.” Sirius pulled Rose onto his lap and kissed the top of her head, “Have you two been keeping her company?” He asked Lupin and Tonks who were trying not to look suspicious or give away the fact that they’d been just talking about him.

“Just telling her some stories.” Tonks said the first thing that came to her mind in reply, she looked to Lupin for help in backing her up.

“I like stories.” Rose added as she twisted around so that she was face to face with Sirius, “I want more stories.” She figured this was the best way to get him to talk about Lily.

“What kind of stories do you want to hear?” Sirius was more than happy to tell Rose as many stories as she wanted; surely he could think of several more which he hadn’t still mentioned before.

“I already told her about our adventures on the Hogwarts Express every year.” Lupin pointed out, although he didn’t mention that this was a conversation from the week before when he had stopped by to visit them.

“Well that’s seven stories done.” Sirius said, remembering those memories easily; those were good times and definitely something fun for Rose to hear about.

“Tell me about Lily.” It was direct and sudden, but coming from Rose, it sounded like nothing more than an innocent and curious request on her behalf.

“What about her?” He looked at the girl on his lap for a second before glancing up to see Lupin and Tonks watching him with… worried expressions? Sirius knew that he never really talked about Lily a lot.

“How did you meet her?” Rose asked simply, hoping that he would answer the question; there were times when he didn’t talk about James as much either… but she had heard all the Quidditch tales, Marauders pranks, and not enough Lily.

“Ah, well I suppose that’s a story I could tell you now.” Sirius said at last, and turned to Lupin for a moment before speaking again, “Have you told Rose about how you and Lily met?” He figured that if this was something he’d share with Rose, then his best friend couldn’t be left behind.

“No. I haven’t told her yet,” Lupin knew that Sirius wanted him and Tonks to stay, which is what they both did. “Mine isn’t as interesting as yours though… you were the first one to meet Lily before any of us, remember?” He also could tell when his friend was putting off telling a story, but if the plan had to work then Sirius needed to open up.

“That is true.” Though he wasn’t sure what exactly Lupin was up to, Sirius figured that it was a simple story to tell Rose and so he began, “I met Lily in our first year itself, before Lupin and James even… it was just after our Christmas holidays, the first time I came back home after joining Hogwarts and things were as good as they could have been.” Sirius paused as he thought about how much he should tell Rose about his life in this very same place they were living in now and decided Lily was more important, “I had ended up in the Astronomy Tower the night before classes started again, not really sure why; I think I just wanted some time alone and even though I had a great big cloak on, it was _freezing_ up there as it always was during winter… and somehow, Lily found me.”

“What happened next?” Rose was intrigued to hear more, she loved how there was a big story behind this meeting and her eyes were focused on his face as he spoke.

“Well, being the clever witch that she always was, Lily conjured up Bluebell flames for us to stay warm and she sat down beside me, introduced herself and we started talking.” Sirius went on with his tale, “I found another best friend that night; she was patient and a good listener and even though our families were different, we did find some common ground. Both of us had younger siblings, but while Regulus and I were still close, Lily and her sister grew apart after she joined Hogwarts… I learned how to listen too, and that was enough.” He had a small smile on his face now as he remembered that night.

“You loved her.” Lupin said at last; everyone else was still busy doing their own things, but the four of them were riveted in this conversation.

Sirius met his friend’s gaze and simply nodded in response; Rose could see the sadness in his eyes but there were no tears visible. “You loved her too.” He didn’t ask, but stated the facts as they were.

“Yeah, I did.” There was a smile on Lupin’s face as he remembered meeting Lily a few weeks later, all of them just eleven years old and still innocent, “She was our best friend, our sister, our mother. Everyone loved her.” He didn’t realize when Tonks had reached out to hold his hand but he was glad for it.

“What about my aunt Marlene?” Rose asked Sirius, wondering where she figured into this story.

“She was Lily’s best friend,” Sirius started to say, “They were as close as James and I; but I didn’t really _notice_ her until maybe our third year… after that… well, we started dating officially at the end of our fifth year. I may have impressed her with my flying motorbike.” Another pause, but this time Rose had already noticed the change, his eyes were starting to water.

“Sirius?” Tonks was also well aware of the fact that she could see the tears in his eyes and spoke up, but he didn’t seem to hear her.

“We were engaged.” His voice was a soft whisper, his attention was focused on Rose, lost in the memory of Marlene once again, now that he had started, he didn’t seem to want to stop. “I had asked her to marry me… just before…” He let the words remain unspoken, “I never imagined settling down, especially not at 22, but after seeing how happy James and Lily were… I thought… I _knew_ that Marlene and I had a chance to make it last, I loved her… but all we got was one perfect day; she was my fiancee for 24 hours… and then she was gone.”

And in that moment, Rose saw a single tear fall at last; it may have been the plan to _make_ him cry, but now she realized this was not a good idea. Without turning from her place on his lap to see Lupin and Tonks, Rose wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged Sirius tightly.

“Who needs some more eggnog?” Sirius said, clearing his throat as he stood up almost immediately, wiping away that one tear from his cheek as he sat Rose down on the sofa, “I think we could all use a refill.” He didn’t wait for an answer but grabbed the three glasses and headed for the kitchen.

“I can’t believe we just did that.” Tonks whispered once Sirius was out of the room, “It didn’t even work did it?” She said, voicing everyone’s thoughts aloud.

“No, not completely.” Lupin said as he glanced at the doorway, “I think perhaps it would be best if we leave this issue aside for the moment, let Sirius find his way when the time is right.” He knew that this method probably wouldn’t have worked out, but at least they each had tried.

“What are you three up to whispering here in the corner?” A loud and familiar voice suddenly interrupted their discussion and they all looked up to see Mad-Eye standing there, holding his hip flask and staring at them.

“Ah, Mad-Eye… good of you to join us at last.” Sirius said as he rejoined the group, “Did Kingsley leave already?” He glanced around the study and saw that only Fred and George were still awake.

“He did.” Moody said to Sirius, “I need to talk to you about something, you and Lupin.” His tone was gruff and even though he didn’t look at Tonks, the young auror understood that it was private.

“Rose and I were just on our way, I’ll make sure she goes to sleep soon Sirius.” Tonks said as she jumped up from her chair and took Rose’s hand, “It’s almost midnight young lady, let’s get you into bed.”

“Okay.” Rose knew better than to say that she wasn’t tired at all and didn’t want to go to sleep.

She waved goodbye to the three men and made her way outside the study with Tonks, but before they reached the stairs, Rose tugged on her hand and when Tonks had knelt down, she whispered something in her ear.

“Oh?” Neither one of them realized that Sirius and Lupin could still see that they were standing by the doorway, Tonks was busy listening to what Rose had to say, “Yes… I know about that… no, well I can’t be sure.”

Rose stopped to think about something else and when her eyes fell on the men, another idea came to her and she continued her secret conversation with Tonks.

“Of course! Why didn’t I think of that. Yes, yes I can do that, leave it to me.” Tonks had visibly brightened up now and smiled as they both left the room at last.

“What was that about?” Sirius asked Lupin who shrugged his shoulders, completely clueless about what he had just seen.

“I really don’t know.” Lupin said truthfully, before turning to Mad-Eye who simply grunted before coming directly to the topic of discussion.

“We need to talk about the McKinnon’s.” There had not been an opportunity for him to speak freely to Sirius and Lupin ever since that night on Sirius’s birthday party.

The main reason for this was because the Minister for Magic, Cornelius Fudge had sent him on several ‘missions’ for a dark-wizard catcher in these last several weeks, keeping Mad-Eye from being able to visit Grimmauld Place. And in the midst of everything, after Arthur’s attack, this was the only opportunity that they would have to talk about the issue at hand.

“What news do you have?” Knowing that Sirius probably wanted to hear everything immediately and so Lupin asked the question.

“I’ll keep it short; you two already know that I went to Azkaban last month. I found Barty Crouch Jr. or what was left of him anyway.” Moody paused for a second to see if either man would say something but they didn’t interrupt him. “The man’s not even alive anymore, they buried him after I left… but I got what I needed from his memories; somehow they were still intact and from there I found another lead which took me to Lockhart.”

“Lockhart? Why?” Sirius said at last, sounding surprised and confused, “What does he have to do with anything?” He asked Mad-Eye, wondering where this was going.

“He was the reason why Evelyn McKinnon left her house that day five months ago with her husband.” It was time to explain all that he had learned, “Barty was able to make the connection that Lockhart was Evelyn’s cousin and pass along the information to his friends before getting caught… and using the news of Lockhart dying at St. Mungo’s with the wish to see his family one last time, the Death Eaters lured Thomas and Evelyn away from safety, out into the open and attacked them when no one expected any danger.” Moody’s expression was grim as he finished.

“He was used as bait?” Lupin couldn’t believe what he was hearing, “How… how did they get to Lockhart? We just saw him at St. Mungo’s and his condition hasn’t changed.”

“I know that, boy!” His voice was a little raised by thankfully there was no one else in the room now. “I went to see Lockhart for myself after Arthur was attacked; Dumbledore ordered me to find out what I could from his memories. There was no sign that he came into contact with any Death Eaters in the last six months.”

“They didn’t need him.” Sirius spoke up, his hands folded under his chin, “As long as they had some proof that Lockhart was dying, something they could have conjured up, it would be enough to draw Evelyn out.” There was still one point Mad-Eye had not mentioned. “You haven’t said anything about Rose; is she in danger? Do they know about her?”

“No. The girl is safe; I checked all my sources, no one knows about her, no one is coming after her, not even Voldemort.” Moody added as an afterthought, “He’s too busy worrying about the weapon to bother over one last McKinnon.” He let Harry’s name stay unspoken but knew that Sirius and Lupin were thinking the same thing.

“That’s good. We know that everything is still the way it is meant to be, Harry is here for a few more days and after he returns to Hogwarts, Dumbledore will keep an eye on him.” Lupin realized that Sirius had to be worried about Harry and Rose, who were both his responsibility.

“Harry can take care of himself.” It was not lost on Sirius that his Godson had a knack of danger finding _him_ as Harry often mentioned, but with his friends and the protection Hogwarts offered, he could breathe a little easily now.

“What will you tell the girl?” Moody asked Sirius as he took a sip from his hip-flask.

“Everything. One day, when she’s older and can understand all of this.” Sirius didn’t need to specify that it included _his_ past as well. “She deserves to know.” He couldn’t keep the truth from her for long, but at only 4, Rose was still too young to hear all the details.

“Do you know _who_ was responsible for what happened to Thomas and Evelyn?” Lupin had been thinking about this for a while now.

“Amycus Carrow and Antonin Dolohov. Unconfirmed.” Of course it was a lie, everything could be confirmed and official, but given the state of the Ministry and Fudge’s behavior… things were different. They all had to stay under the radar as always, that was what being part of the Order meant. Mad-Eye reiterated that with one word to both Sirius and Lupin.

“What does it matter?” Sirius suddenly got to his feet, “They’re ghosts, hiding in the shadows, untouchable.” He didn’t want to be here discussing these pointless things on Christmas night, he wanted to be somewhere else.

“Where are you going?” Lupin asked him, he had a good idea of what was on Sirius’s mind now.

“To see Rose.” Was all the other man said before he bade them both goodnight, muttered a ‘Merry Christmas’ under his breath and left the room.

Sirius was in for a surprise however; as soon as he reached his and Rose’s bedroom a few minutes later, he saw that not only was she awake and standing outside in the corridor, but that Tonks was still with her. When they both noticed him there, Rose ran over to hug him while his cousin raised her hands in defense.

“I tried to get her in bed but she wouldn’t let me tuck her in,” Tonks explained, “I had to listen to Rose say _‘I want Sirius!’_ at least ten times before I gave up and brought her out here to wait for you.” There was a grin on her face as she spoke and Sirius got the feeling that there was more to the story.

“Is that true love?” He decided to ask Rose herself about this and knelt down to meet her eye to eye.

“Yes. I want you to tuck me in, I don’t like sleeping alone.” Rose said, nodding her head; Tonks had managed to change her into night clothes but that was it.

“See! I even tried to bribe her with a fairy tale or two but that didn’t work either.” Tonks even reminded Rose that she was staying over tonight, which didn’t help either and she couldn’t figure out what had happened in the last half hour.

“Maybe what she needs is a little midnight snack, am I right love?” Sirius said as soon as he heard a growling noise coming from Rose’s stomach.

“Maybe?” Blushing immediately as she hugged herself by the waist, Rose tried not to look too guilty as she admitted the truth.

Sirius couldn’t help but chuckle when he heard her say that, and lifted her in his arms, “C’mon then, let’s go find something to eat.” He hadn’t forgotten his cousin of course, “Dora, would you like to join us?”

However, before Tonks could answer, they were all met with an unexpected surprise as Lupin suddenly showed up on the landing.

“You forgot that I’m staying here tonight didn’t you Padfoot?” Lupin addressed his friend, arms crossed over his chest.

“It might have… slipped my mind yeah.” Sirius said and felt Rose’s warm breath in his ear as she whispered something to him.

“I figured as much.” Since he couldn’t see Rose’s face, Lupin couldn’t tell that she had spoken to Sirius and Tonks was standing away from them too.

“Well, I was just about to take Rose downstairs for a bite to eat…” Trying to hide the grin on his face, Sirius spoke casually, “And I had promised to walk Dora to her room, she’s a little exhausted.” He could see his cousin’s eyes widening in surprise as she tried to say something but Sirius went on talking to Lupin, “Do you mind, Moony?”

“Oh. No, not at all.” Lupin said as he turned around to face Tonks who had been standing behind him without saying anything. “May I walk you to your room?” He asked her, offering his hand.

“Yes, thank you.” Tonks finally said and hoped the lights were dark enough to hide the redness in her cheeks. “I’ll see you tomorrow Sirius, Rose. Goodnight.” A part of her was glad to have heard that Lupin had agreed to stay here tonight, but mostly she was just hoping not to trip over her feet.

“Goodnight!” Sirius and Rose said together as they watched Lupin walking with Tonks towards her bedroom.

Once it was just the two of them alone in the corridor, both of them did their best not to burst out laughing as they headed downstairs towards the kitchen; it had been Rose’s idea of course to give Lupin and Tonks a little more time alone and Sirius had executed the idea perfectly.

“Shame we didn’t have any mistletoe.” Thinking out loud, Sirius didn’t bother to hide his smile which made Rose wonder what he was talking about.

“What’s that?” She asked him, not having heard the word ‘mistletoe’ before.

“Let’s just say that it’s a special kind of magic, a plant which works wonders on Christmas.” Sirius explained, “Although now that I think about it, maybe if we _had_ used mistletoe then maybe Moony and Dora would have… not been too happy…” He said, talking more to himself in that moment, “I think we should leave them to figure their feelings out on their own don’t you think?”

“Yes. Good idea.” Rose wasn’t exactly sure what he was talking about but she knew that if it was about Lupin and Tonks, the same suggestion they had agreed on in regards to Sirius’s sadness was the best idea.

“So what will it be?” Sirius asked her when they had reached the kitchen and sat Rose down on the counter. “How hungry are you?”

“Not hungry, thirsty.” Rose said to him, “May I have some hot chocolate please?” She made her request and still held her stomach, dinner had been a few hours ago and even though she had eaten a little bit of almost everything, the hunger seemed to have returned.

“Yes you may have some hot chocolate, with cookies. You need some food in your tummy love.” Sirius told her as he removed two mugs for them and began to get their midnight snack ready. “We can share some of the cookies Molly baked this afternoon yeah?”

“Okay!” Hearing the words ‘cookies’ brought a big smile to Rose’s face, she could never say no to that.

“Alright, here we go.” Barely a few minutes had passed in comfortable silence between them as he laid the table for two. “Hot chocolate and a plate of chocolate chip cookies for you and for me.” Sirius said as he held out a hand for Rose, helping her off the counter.

“Thank you Sirius.” She said and took her seat at the table beside him, breathing in the fresh scent of cookies and hot cocoa; it was the perfect midnight snack on a winter’s night like this.

“You’re very welcome love.” Ruffling her hair, Sirius grinned and broke a cookie in half to share with Rose; there were only three left and if they each ate half then there would be equal pieces for them.

“I like Christmas.” Rose smiled in between bites and blowing to cool the smoke from her mug before taking a tiny sip.

“You know what? I like Christmas too.” Sirius smiled at her and raised their mugs together in cheers.

 


	13. Chapter 12

The next several weeks went by in a flurry of activity that Rose didn’t realize when February had already arrived, along with her next surprise for Sirius. It had taken some time for everything to be arranged, but when the day finally came, she was happy on realizing that coincidentally it was Valentine’s Day… or as she liked to call it, Love Day.

“How exactly did you manage to pull this off love?” Sirius asked Rose as he stood with her in the basement, admiring his gift in a wonderstruck awe.

“I asked Dora, she asked Moony and he asked Hagrid.” Rose explained, watching him and smiling brightly; this gift definitely was truly special and she was glad that after weeks of planning, somehow Hagrid had managed to get it here.

“Well that explains a lot.” He said, never once breaking eye contact, “I _cannot_ believe you thought of this.” Clearly, Rose was still very good at giving him surprises every now and then, surprises which were meaningful, close to his heart, things which were once lost had been returned.

She didn’t have to say anything in reply to that because just seeing his happiness was all she needed. After the Christmas party, things at Grimmauld Place had remained cheerful, Arthur had returned a little while after the New Year and even once Harry had left for Hogwarts again, Rose made sure she did her best to keep Sirius’s spirits up… something that he seemed to have thought of for her as well… having realized that this was her first proper holiday without her family, Sirius took it upon himself to do more fun things with Rose; they started building blanket forts, drawing lessons side by side, having pillow fights at night, and now this was something else they could work on together.

“Thank you, Rose.” Sirius turned around to face her at last, and held out a hand to show her just what this gift meant to him.

“You’re welcome!” Rose took his hand and walked down the steps into the basement where the gift stood.

It was his old motorbike, black in color with the sidecar still intact and possibly with the ability to fly even after all these years. Sirius could clearly remember the last time he had seen this bike, the night he gave it to Hagrid to transport Harry away from Godric’s Hollow, but to have it here now, he couldn’t believe that Rose had brought it back to him.

“Well… let’s see if this thing still works shall we?” All examinations aside, Sirius decided to get started.

The bike’s condition was fairly decent considering that Hagrid had kept it in storage for the last fourteen years, a little cleaning and repainting, some polishing and re-shining, that was all they needed to do really. And to check if it could fly as well. Rose was ready for whatever Sirius asked of her; this was definitely more fun than spending all afternoon in the kitchen…

“Oh no!” She gasped out loud in surprise when she remembered something very important that they had forgotten.

“What is it love?” Sirius asked her, having just removed his jacket and rolled up his sleeves.

“The cookies!” Rose exclaimed; she and Sirius had woken up early that morning with the plan to bake cookies in honor of it being Valentine’s Day. And chocolates too. Those were finished first and had been left to cool, but their cookies were still in the oven?

“Ah…” His eyes widened in surprise as he realized that there was a chance the cookies were in danger of being burned; the two of them had left the kitchen a half hour ago when Hagrid himself came to deliver the motorbike, leaving the cookies behind.

As quickly as possible, they left everything on the floor and began to head for the kitchen when both Sirius and Rose bumped into Tonks who stood at the top of the staircase.

“If you’re off to the kitchen to save the cookies then don’t worry, I took care of it.” Tonks said to them happily, “I just got here and heard the timer; they’re safe, not burned.” She explained hurriedly.

“Oh, thank you Dora!” Beaming brightly, Rose hugged the older woman and felt very relieved now.

“No problem Rose… am I interrupting something?” Glancing between the two, Tonks noticed that the two of them were already covered in dust.

“You should know since you’re the one who arranged for my bike to be brought back.” Sirius pointed out with a grin, “Thanks for that by the way.” He said to her.

“Well that was all Rose really, I just helped her.” Tonks smiled her cousin feeling glad to see that he was happy.

“We were just cleaning it and checking to see if it still can fly.” Sirius explained as he rested a hand on Rose’s head and brushed away some… wood shavings she seemed to have picked up on her shoulders.

“That sounds like a good idea.” She knew that it wasn’t possible for the bike to be used outdoors but now that Sirius had it with him, at least being able to work on it was still something.

“Will you help us?” Rose suddenly piped up as she turned to Tonks.

“I’ve never really been good with bikes.” Laughing a little at that thought, Tonks explained her reason for showing up there all of a sudden, “I just came over to see what you two were up to today.”

“Not much, it is Valentine’s Day though.” Sirius stated the obvious and met her fierce glare.

“So?” Tonks stood where she was and wondered where Sirius was going to take this conversation next; there was a feeling in her heart, but it wasn’t dread… was it… hopeful?

“So… don’t you have any _plans_ cousin?” He prodded her a little, wondering if there was something she would tell him.

“No, I don’t.” She crossed her arms over her chest and did nothing to hide the change in her tone.

“What about any secret admirers? Or co-workers?” There was a hint of that cheeky smirk on his face as he spoke.

All the while, Rose simply stood there quietly glancing between the two adults, watching as they talked to each other in a very confusing way; she didn’t yet understand what the idea of subtle and indirect conversations as this meant, but she knew when to stay silent and let this play out between Sirius and Tonks.

“Honestly Sirius, if you’re going to start talking about my love life then I should probably go back to the kitchen and make sure you haven’t left anything else to burn.” Tonks tried not to sound rude, but she really wasn’t in the mood for being teased.

“Well… the homemade chocolates do need to be checked on.” Sirius decided to mention that in the moment, hoping to alleviate the tension he could feel in the air.

“Okay then.” Turning around on her heel, Tonks was about to leave when Sirius caught her by the wrist.

“Wait wait wait…” He said, tugging her hand gently to make her face him again, “Dora, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have teased you like that.” It wasn’t very nice of him to have done that and Sirius realized he needed to apologize to Tonks.

“It’s fine.” She shrugged, but gave him a half-smile. Tonks didn’t know exactly how much Sirius _knew_ about her dislike for this particular holiday, but she wasn’t about to cry over it either.

“No, it isn’t. I have something for you.” Sirius spoke softly, in a more kinder tone now to show that he meant what he was telling her.

“What is it?” Tonks was curious, it wasn’t her birthday today, but if Sirius had something for her, she couldn’t really refuse him.

“Rose, would you mind…?” Meeting the little girl’s gaze, Sirius gestured to her and watched as Rose realized what he was asking of her.

“Oh, _yes_!” Rose nodded her head when she understood; Sirius had left a small gift for Tonks down in the basement and she hurried back down the stairs to retrieve it for him.

It didn’t take long for her to return and when she did, Tonks barely had a second to notice what Rose brought up with her before Sirius presented his gift. A small bouquet of roses, one of each color - white, yellow, pink and red!

“Here you are Dora. Happy Valentine’s Day.” Sirius even bowed dramatically as he stood on level with Tonks at the top of the staircase, a real smile on his face.

“These are beautiful Sirius, thank you.” Tonks didn't know what to say, she appreciated the gesture and breathed the sweet scent.

“So… am I forgiven?” He asked her, exchanging a quick glance with Rose who smiled at him in reassurance.

“Yes you are dear cousin." Giving him a tiny kiss on his cheek, Tonks spoke to them both, "Why don’t you two finish up working on the bike, I’ll be here getting lunch ready for us.”

“Will do. C’mon my trusted helper, let’s get back to it.” Sirius accepted her offer for Tonks was always welcome to join him and Rose at any given time of the day.

“Okay!” Rose's excitement had returned immediately, she couldn't wait to work on the bike a little more.

True to his word, Sirius did ask Rose to help him while the two of them quickly descended to the basement and resumed their task of fixing up the motorbike; he had sat her atop the main seat and for the next quarter of an hour, she passed him the rags, the water, the wand that was needed to make it look as good as new. The sidecar which was separated to be cleaned on its own was re-attached now and there was nothing else left. Sirius seemed to be satisfied that they had done everything possible as he stood up and wiped his hands which were greasy and black and sweaty too.

“You missed a spot.” Rose pointed out, and got to her feet.

“ _Whoa_! What do you think you’re doing love?” Sirius’s immediate reaction was to hold her waist since she was trying to balance on top of the bike.

“Helping you.” She said and using a clean cloth, rubbed off a grease mark on his forehead.

“Thank you.” He grinned and kissed her cheek. “So what do you think? Shall we see if she can fly?” This was the moment that he had been waiting for all along.

“Yes please.” Rose had been extremely curious about witnessing her first ever flying vehicle upfront; she hadn’t seen _anything_ that could fly up until now.

“Alright, here we go then.” Sirius walked over to the bike, but before he could do anything, Rose had climbed down from the seat. “Where are you off to now?” He asked her.

“I have to stand down.” She said, looking at him a little confused.

“Says who?” He stood there but didn’t wait for her to reply before he asked another question, “Don’t you want to sit with me when I start it up?”

“Yes I do, but…” This was the last thing Rose had expected to hear from Sirius; he was offering her a chance to sit on the bike when he flew it?

“But what love?” Kneeling down and taking both hands in his, Sirius met Rose’s gaze and gave her a smile.

“Is it safe?” She asked, knowing the basic rules of staying away from adult’s possessions.

“Yes of course it’s safe. You’ll be perfectly fine. I promise.” Sirius said, “I won’t let anything happen to you; and besides, we’re just going to lift off a few feet and that’s it really… nothing to worry about.” He explained, hoping to reassure her.

Taking a moment to gather herself, Rose turned around to look at the bike now that she was up close; it was big and open and had only two wheels unlike a car which was more of a box with windows and doors to keep everyone inside. But when she faced Sirius again and saw him patiently watching her, Rose realized something important - she trusted him completely. If he said it was safe then that was all she needed to hear. There was also the fact that they weren’t going to be leaving the basement either so the thought of being worried seemed a bit silly.

“I’m ready.” Her voice was soft but without any fear and Rose took Sirius’s hand in hers as he lifted her back onto the bike.

“Let’s do this then.” He sat down behind her, knowing that it would be easier for him if she was in front on the seat.

After doing a quick check of all the gears and flexing the handles, Sirius put Rose’s hands on his arms for her to hold before turning the bike on. There was a loud sputtering noise followed by an instantaneous roaring of the engine which was almost deafening for Rose clamped her ears shut and winced without screaming; it lasted but a second once Sirius flicked his wand and silenced the noise.

“Sorry about that. I forgot how beastly this thing got when it woke up.” Sirius touched Rose’s shoulder and saw her tilt her head upwards to look at him.

“It’s okay. I’m fine.” She rubbed her ears before giving him the all clear to go ahead and try it again; thankfully Tonks hadn’t come rushing down to see what had happened.

“Attempt number 2.” This time, Sirius made sure everything was quietened when he started the engine once more.

The bike purred to life now and felt familiar to him as he checked all the buttons, but not pushing any, this was not the time or place for experimenting; everything seemed normal and working smoothly and in a manner of seconds, Sirius had maneuvered it to start hovering not more than five feet from the floor, keeping it steady. This lasted for about thirty seconds, during which, he sensed Rose relax within no time and she even raised her hands to her sides and laughed at finally being able to experience something special. Before she knew it, Sirius landed the bike, a little trickier than he’d expected; flying a motorbike while not moving forward or even backward was one of those things he hadn’t done in a long time but he managed it successfully without any bumps.

“Wow.” Rose didn’t even wait for the bike to properly touch the basement floor as she spun around to jump into Sirius’s arms. “Can we do that again? I loved it!” She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so… exhilarated; it was more than happiness, it was exciting and thrilling and wonderful.

“Ha, well we can do it whenever you want love… I’m glad you enjoyed that… but we do have to go upstairs for lunch now.” Sirius kissed her on the head, “Maybe later.” He promised her.

“Okay! Good.” The flying had lasted for a little time but Rose couldn’t stop feeling like she wanted to bounce and bounce.

“You certainly seem very relaxed now, if I didn’t know better I’d say that you have a good chance at learning how to ride a broomstick one day.” Sirius mused out loud, as the two of them stepped off the bike and made their way upstairs.

“Really?” Rose was excited by that prospect too. After all the stories she had heard about Sirius’s days of playing Quidditch and even from Harry, Ron and the Twins, she hadn’t really thought about doing so herself… until now.

“Maybe for your birthday… we’ll see.” That was all Sirius could say to Rose on the matter; talking about birthday gifts at this point could prove to be difficult if he accidentally let slip something about a surprise or two that he may have already set in motion for her.

“That is not far away.” She pointed out, but also knew in that moment she probably couldn’t count the exact number of days until her birthday without a calendar or something.

“No, no it isn’t. Less than two months now.” Sirius said with a grin.

“What’s two months from now?” Tonks’ voice floated out through the kitchen doors as they entered.

“My birthday!” Rose announced happily, she had started counting a few days on her finger just to see how far she got, but the smell of freshly baked cookies which Tonks had left out on the table distracted her. “The cookies are safe.” She ran over to sit down in her usual chair but didn’t touch the dish yet; lunch came first and then dessert would be served.

“Yes they are.” Smiling at Rose’s happiness, Tonks sat down beside her, “I may have… burned a little of our lunch though.” She added and hoped she wasn’t already blushing.

“Leave that to me Dora.” Sirius let out a soft chuckle as he walked over to where the food lay and began to see what could be salvaged.

While he was busy with their lunch, Rose took it upon herself to talk in as much detail as she could about Sirius’s flying motorbike to Tonks; the first thing she started with was the last part with them testing its flight skills. And at the mention of getting a broomstick for her birthday, Tonks merely exchanged a quick look with Sirius who was bringing the plates to the table, but Rose was too busy to notice anything and went on with her tale. However, just when the three of them sat down to eat, there came another guest as the doorbell began to ring all of a sudden.

“Oh no.” Tonks barely had the chance to whisper a soft groan before the screams of Mrs. Black began.

“I’ll deal with her, you get the door.” This didn’t happen very often, but Sirius figured it was his turn.

The two of them parted ways in the hall, Sirius going over to silence his mother’s portrait while Tonks answered the door. Rose who stayed behind, wondered if this was her chance to sneak a peek at the cookies to see how they had turned out, decided her curiosity about their unexpected arrival was more and so she tiptoed outside the kitchen towards the entrance. Tonks had opened the main door and saw something unexpected… Lupin was standing there at the threshold with a… bouquet of pink roses in his hands and a smile on his face which turned to surprise when he saw Tonks.

“Remus, hey.” She said to him as she stared at the dozen flowers and wondered if…

“Tonks! I didn’t expect to see you here.” Lupin gave her a smile as he stepped into the house, not knowing that his words disproved her sudden thoughts.

“Oh… yes, well… I had the day off and wanted to spend some time here.” Tonks replied as she moved aside to let him enter; the realization that these flowers were for someone else already struck her and though she felt an odd twinge inside, she ignored the feeling, trying to push it away.

“That’s nice…” He started to say and then noticed Tonks’ gaze on the flowers and in that moment understood what she must have thought when he said… “Oh, umm… these are for Rose. I thought she’d like them.” Inwardly, he felt ridiculous for not mentioning that from the beginning, considering there was a slight awkwardness in the corridor around them now.

“Hello?” Rose suddenly poked her head from behind the wall where she had waited, only for a few seconds before she heard her name.

“Hello Rose.” Lupin smiled when he saw her and held out the bouquet, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

“For me?” She walked to where Lupin and Tonks stood, and took the flowers in her hands, “Thank you Moony! Happy Love Day!” Reaching up to hug him, Rose kissed his cheek.

“Love Day, that’s a nice name.” He hadn’t heard this until now but did like the sound of it.

“Ah Moony, it is good to see you. This is a lovely surprise.” Sirius said as he reached the hallway having finished silencing his mother’s screams.

The two friends shook hands and when Sirius noticed that Tonks was unusually quiet, he took one glance at Rose, the flowers, and Lupin, getting the gist of what had just occurred. It was time for him to give them a moment together; which meant he had to steer Rose back into the kitchen for lunch after extending the offer to Lupin to join them.

“I’ll be right in.” First, he had to remove his jacket and while he did so, he sensed that Tonks was about to leave; his impulsive nature which was practically non-existent suddenly took over as he caught hold of her hand. “Tonks… I was hoping I could speak with you for a second.” He said softly.

“Oh! Yes, of course.” She didn’t know what to say to him, but now she could clearly feel her heart hammering against her chest as they stood only a few feet apart.

“I… I had something for you.” Lupin reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out something small, handing it over to Tonks without another word; it was a bunch of lilac flowers.

“Lilacs. They’re my favorite, thank you Remus.” Tonks hoped her eyes weren’t wide in surprise as she took the flowers… there were many questions on her mind… but she didn’t or couldn’t put words to them just yet.

“You’re welcome. I heard that they were your favorite, so…” Rubbing the back of his neck with one hand, Lupin didn’t know what else to say to her; it _was_ Valentine’s Day but he had just given her flowers that _weren’t_ roses and he didn’t know if she had thought the roses were for her or not.

“Well, we should probably join Sirius and Rose for lunch.” She broke the silence between them, “They’ve made cookies and chocolates too.” At least they could talk about something simple.

“Sirius sure has changed hasn’t he?” Lupin commented on hearing that his best friend was busy baking whenever the occasion arose.

“Yes and it’s all thanks to Rose. She’s changed him for the better.” Tonks felt comfortable once more.

“She’s changed all of us in some ways.” His voice was a soft whisper when he spoke, but Tonks did hear him clear enough to wonder what Lupin meant by that.

Unfortunately, there wasn’t any time for either one to continue this conversation as they had entered the kitchen; over the next hour, the four of them were caught up in tales of Valentine’s Day celebrations at Hogwarts, more of Sirius’s own experiences than anything… but he also chose to tell Rose and Tonks all about James and Lily, how it took every possible attempt for James to win Lily’s heart. A little while later, the topic of discussion soon turned to Harry. Sirius mentioned that his godson had plans for the day at Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop in Hogsmeade with a Ravenclaw girl, Cho Chang; something he knew about because Harry had asked _him_ for advice in the last letter they’d exchanged. And as they exchanged stories, they soon found themselves _finally_ enjoying the heart shaped cookies with pink sugar frosting and milk chocolates for dessert which turned out to be quite delicious. Some time in the late afternoon, the talk eventually reached… love.

“What is love?” Rose asked Sirius as she settled down on his lap; they had moved to the study for drinks.

“Ah. That is a good question Rose.” Sirius pondered about it for a few moments, wondering what he could tell her, “Love can be many things, love between friends and family, love that is pure and true, love is kindness, happiness, unconditional… it’s… well it’s a feeling that can’t always be explained with words.” He said with a chuckle.

“I think that… love is layered, it’s a mystery to be uncovered.” Tonks answered next, smiling at the thought behind those words.

“Love is unexpected.” Lupin suddenly said as he spoke up, draining the last of his drink without looking at anyone in particular.

“I think love is magic.” It was a simple answer; something that Rose had been thinking about for quite some time now.

“Love is magic, that sounds perfect to me.” The idea seemed to ring true as Sirius leaned back against the sofa and closed his eyes for a moment, thinking about what Rose had said; for the first time in a long time, he had actually celebrated Valentine’s Day with his close friends and it had been… pleasant. Perhaps _this_ is what love really was.


	14. Chapter 13

Seven weeks later came another milestone event that was cause for celebration - Rose's fifth birthday had arrived at last. Coincidentally at the very same time, it was also Easter weekend and that was all Sirius needed to know for him to host a 2-in-1 party; something which Rose didn't know about in too much detail, but on the morning of her birthday, when she awoke from her preferred sleeping spot on Sirius's chest without disturbing him, she discovered what would turn out to be just _one_ of the many surprises for her… albeit this was probably the most important of them all. Lying at the foot of her bed were presents!

"Wow!" Rose exclaimed softly as she clambered down carefully and quietly, making sure that Sirius didn't wake up, staring in awe at the multiple gifts all wrapped up in colorful, shining, sparkling paper.

Now, being a very responsible child for her age, Rose knew that it would be _very_ wrong if she just ripped them open so early in the morning before the party even began… but… there was no reason for her not to examine the gifts. It was also not lost on her that there was more than just the one gift she had expected from Sirius.

"One. Two. Three. Four. Five." Counting each one of them, Rose couldn't help but wonder if these were _all_ Sirius's gifts to her?

Her curiosity would certainly get the best of her and while she did have some amount of self-control, Rose still ogled the gifts in front of her, one finger on a cheek as she thought about what lay within; two gifts were medium sized thin boxes, a third was considerably smaller than everything else, the fourth was bigger in size but still square shaped… but the fifth… that was the most intriguing shape. And if Rose had not seen something like this in one of Sirius's drawings, she probably wouldn't have been able to guess what it was almost immediately.

"No way!" Rose breathed in a soft whisper when she realized what this fifth gift was; her hands moved of their own accord to touch the object and surely enough, it felt like now would be the appropriate time for happy screaming. Soft screaming.

What she hadn't anticipated in that minute of course, was the fact that her immense feelings of happiness and excitement would be channeled into something different; something which unknowingly caused Sirius to wake up. He had spent the previous night making sure everything was ready for the party and nothing was forgotten; all the invites had been sent to their friends, the decorations were complete, her birthday cake prepared, the theme organized, birthday clothes set aside, and eventually he fell asleep a little later than usual… but in these early hours of the morning, with Rose already awake and ecstatic over her gifts, Sirius didn't expect to feel something tickling his nose even before his eyes opened.

"Rose?" Sirius called out to her in a low voice as he blinked once, twice, thrice… seeing… a white feather floating in the air above his face?

Sitting upright, with a wondrous look on his face, Sirius took in the surroundings and figured out what had happened in a matter of seconds. The entire bed was covered in floating feathers; their pillow fight from the night before had left the feathers behind, and for some reason at eight o'clock in the morning, Rose had caused them all to fly with her magic. By now, her attention was no longer focused on the gifts as she took in the sight and realized Sirius was awake as well.

"I don't know what happened." She said, her eyes wide in surprise, the feathers continued to hover.

"Not to worry love, it's just a bit of your magic." He smiled, "Close your eyes and think that the feathers are not floating anymore." It was something he had taught Rose to do whenever her magic acted up.

"Okay." This had happened a few times over the last eight months and by now, Rose learned that her magic didn't always have to be scary.

Closing her eyes and thinking about the feathers, she could tell that it had worked when she opened them a moment later and saw they were all laying on the bed, perfectly still; except for one stray feather which had found its way to rest atop Sirius's head. Seeing that, Rose didn't even think before she burst out giggling.

"Wha…?" Sirius was confused when he saw Rose laughing all of a sudden until he noticed her pointing in his direction and reached a hand to his hair, "Oh. Very funny Rose." He pulled the feather out and set it aside.

"It is funny!" Rose didn't stop even then, but was now trying to keep her mouth closed with a big grin.

"Really? Why don't I show you what _funny_ means." The twinkle in his eyes went unnoticed by Rose as Sirius bent down to grab her by the waist and started to tickle her!

That definitely did the trick, Sirius had learned only a few short days ago about Rose being extremely ticklish and in the early hours of the morning, it may have gotten her a bit more hyper, for several seconds until she calmed down.

"Not funny." She grumbled into Sirius's shirt, trying to catch her breath as she buried her head on his shoulder.

"It's your birthday love, c'mon… give us a smile." Sirius knew when Rose was being playful and figured she probably had something in mind.

" _No_." Shaking her head, Rose refused to budge; there was no smile on her face but she wasn't upset, she just didn't really enjoy being tickled when it made her so jumpy.

"What can I do to make it up to you?" Every once in a while, Sirius would play along with her until he could tell that Rose would be okay. It being her birthday meant that whatever she asked of him may be special?

Rose whispered something into Sirius's ear and leaned back, waiting to see what his reaction was; it didn't have any connection to what the situation this morning had conjured up with her magic and the tickling, but Sirius figured that Rose's request was something he could agree too without a second's thought. Which is what he did.

"Go ahead love." Sirius said to her with a smile on his face; he was wide awake now and decided Rose might even surprise him.

"Thank you!" Rose hugged Sirius before getting to work, this also gave her a chance to mention the gifts.

Standing up on the bed and holding Sirius's hand, Rose walked around until she was behind him and grabbed what she needed from their bedside table. There was a comb in one hand and a hair tie in the other; she had chosen to make his hair for him.

"So tell me birthday girl, did you already see the gifts or not?" Something about having Rose comb his hair first thing in the morning was relaxing to Sirius as he brought up the topic himself.

"Yes. But I did not open them." She answered him and then asked the one question that had been on her mind since she possibly recognized what the oddly shaped gift was. "Sirius… is that…?" Rose barely managed to say before he replied back.

"It sure is love." He didn't need to hear the whole question to know what exactly she was talking about.

"But I thought…" Rose was surprised; she hadn't expected Sirius to actually have pulled it off.

"Never you mind all that now, the gifts can be opened later tonight after we cut your cake." Sirius brushed the talk aside, not wanting to ruin the surprise for her completely, "So… are you done?" He could tell that she was trying something different with his hair, he just wasn't sure what that was… yet.

"Yes!" Beaming at her attempt, Rose came back to face Sirius, watching him turn to the mirror and examine the 'new' look.

Sirius noted that it wasn't a ponytail, nor had Rose tried to tie it up in a bun; instead she had taken half of his hair and tied that into a small ponytail while leaving the other half open and combed straight. Given the fact of him being unshaven that week, he wondered if he should leave the scruff the way it was since Rose seemed to have not mentioned anything so far.

"Do you like it?" Rose couldn't tell what Sirius thought of her idea, she didn't even know where she came up with it, her hands just worked on their own accord.

"Of course I like it, something new is always good!" Sirius kissed her cheek and decided it was time the two of them got ready for the day, "Right, well we have lots to do before the party begins, but first things first, breakfast." He said, lifting Rose in his arms and headed for the kitchen.

Over the next couple of hours, working side by side together, as they always did, both Sirius and Rose were able to finish up any last minute details of the party which needed to be dealt with; by noon, everything was done and only the guests had to arrive. By now, Rose had learned of the surprise her birthday theme entailed - Sirius had organized an Easter Egg hunt in the house! It wouldn't begin until after lunch though… in the meantime… there remained one thing left for them to do.

"May I?" Sirius asked as he walked up to Rose, they were downstairs in the hall waiting when she had realized that _her_ hair wasn't made at all; being unable to decide on what to do with her hair, Rose left it open but kept fidgeting.

"Okay." Rose sighed and sat down on the sofa, hoping that Sirius had a better idea. The dress she wore felt good, her shoes were comfortable but her hair was a mess!

"This is a little something that I learned from Lily when we were back at school; she _always_ made it a point to tie my hair at every chance she got and the first time I was able to do the same for her, she taught me a few things." They had a little time to spare, no one had shown up yet and Sirius could tell that Rose was worried; it was one of the reasons why he thought a French braid would be perfect.

"Oh wow." Rose's voice sounded soft and amazed when she looked at herself in the mirror, twirling around to see her shoulder length hair had been transformed into something beautiful. "Thank you Sirius, it's so pretty!" She couldn't believe that they hadn't tried this hairstyle before, but today was the best day to try new things.

"You're very welcome love." Sirius had to remember not to kiss Rose's head in case he messed her hair up.

Just then, they both heard knocks from the main door and exchanged a smile, the guests were here which meant that the party could officially begin. Surely enough, one by one, everyone from the Order arrived within minutes of each other - Tonks was the first, followed by Molly and Arthur, Kingsley, Mad-Eye and lastly, Lupin. Each of them came bearing colorful gifts for Rose who kept them all on the table where Sirius's gifts were… at the time of lunch… she counted that the number had gone up from five to ten, but didn't yet know there was plenty more to come. As soon as the Easter Egg hunt was underway, Rose spared no chances of teaming up with just one person and decided to take everyone's help as she tackled every single room with one adult accompanying her at all times; it wasn't a competition for _who_ could find the most number of eggs, but rather how _long_ it took for Rose to find them. After that, Sirius had told her there would be more games to play, but throughout the entire afternoon, Grimmauld Place was filled with music and laughter and applause whenever Rose emerged from her searches with a basket of Easter Eggs.

"Who else is left, Rose?" Tonks asked her when they had sat down for a few minutes to catch their breath and have some juice and cookies; the two of them proved to be a very good team working together to find all the Easter eggs which were hidden upstairs in Buckbeak's room.

"Moony!" Rose exclaimed happily, according to Sirius, everyone who had helped her so far finished at almost the same time which meant before evening, she would be done.

"You called?" Lupin said as he walked over and sat down next to Rose, "It's my turn isn't it?" He asked her.

"Yes it is." Nodding her head emphatically, Rose didn't waste another second and grabbed his hand, running off to the next part of the house; Sirius had given each adult a parchment with several clues to the location of the eggs and Lupin knew the hardest one had been left for last - the library. "Let's go!" She said, very much excited to be at the end of the hunt, knowing that there was a big prize once it finished.

Lupin didn't need to be told twice and let Rose lead the way, neither one realizing that mere minutes later, there would be another arrival at the party; someone unexpected who was greeted by Sirius at the front door.

"Minerva! This is a pleasant surprise." Sirius hadn't known that she could take time off from Hogwarts, even though the week long holidays were going on, to show up for Rose's birthday.

"Hello Sirius, I spoke to our _Headmistress_ and figured there was no harm in taking the day away from… everything." McGonagall said to him, without elaborating on the details, but Sirius could tell that the older witch seemed to be refraining from commenting on how things were at Hogwarts ever since Dumbledore had been replaced by Dolores Umbridge.

"That's good, I'm glad you could make it. Rose will be happy to see you again." Stepping aside to let her in, Sirius noticed that McGonagall had come bearing gifts… a lot of them.

"These are from Harry and the others; I thought it would be easier to bring everything personally instead of Owl Post." All in all, including her own gift for Rose, McGonagall had six gifts!

"Good point." Sirius knew that Harry, Ron and Hermione were busy preparing for their O.W.L.s which were only a few short weeks away, and the fact that Umbridge would be examining parcels that went in and out of the school.

"Where is the birthday girl?" McGonagall asked Sirius after she met everyone else, noticing that Rose wasn't around.

"Ah, she's actually finishing up the Easter Egg hunt with Remus right now." Going over to grab a glass of pumpkin juice for McGonagall, Sirius explained that he had planned the activity for all of the guests who were helping Rose as they worked in pairs.

Hearing that, it seemed to be the perfect opportunity to take Sirius away for a moment since the others were busy in conversation amongst themselves. McGonagall didn't have much time before she had to return to Hogwarts; but what she had to tell him was important, and this would very well be the only chance she would get to speak to him privately.

"Sirius, might I have a word?" McGonagall took his elbow and led him to one corner where no one would disturb them; fortunately, the others hadn't noticed anything yet.

"Of course Minerva, is everything okay?" Sirius didn't say a word when she suddenly turned secretive; he wondered if there was something about Harry that he needed to know of.

"Yes. I simply wished to discuss the matter with which you asked for my assistance in conveying your wishes to Albus not too long ago." This was a delicate situation but a necessary one, "I have some news regarding the progress of the request." She said to him and saw that he realized what she was referring to.

"Right, yes… that." He tried not to let his emotions betray the thoughts which were starting to flood his mind in that moment. "Is it bad news?" Sirius hadn't told anyone about this except for McGonagall and Dumbledore.

"Not quite." McGonagall knew there was no easy way to say this, "As you are still in a difficult situation, the terms of this request cannot be fulfilled currently…" A pause to note his reaction before continuing, "I do have it on Albus' word that once things change and your name is cleared, then there will be no other obstacles to deal with." She couldn't imagine what he was thinking, but laid a hand on his arm as a show of support.

"Well… I suppose things could be worse." Rubbing the back of his neck, Sirius glanced around to see the other members of the Order before facing McGonagall, "At least it's not been rejected." He was doing his best not to feel disheartened, the request he'd made could eventually be made a reality… one day.

"I trust Albus will do his best to help." Was all that McGonagall could say to try and reassure Sirius, for as soon as she spoke, Rose came running down the stairs with Lupin.

"Miss Minnie!" She couldn't believe that McGonagall was actually here on her birthday; the two hadn't met for quite some time, but seeing her now, Rose was elated.

"Happy Birthday Rose." McGonagall smiled as the little girl hugged her. "I heard that you were hunting for Easter Eggs?"

"I found them all! Moony helped lots in the library." Rose showed McGonagall and Sirius the last basket in her hands.

"I just reached the higher places really." Lupin said as he shook hands with McGonagall, "Can I get you something to eat Minerva?" He asked her.

"No, thank you Remus. I can't stay long… the Headmistress insisted that all professor's must stay at Hogwarts over Easter, but I had to come and see Rose." She did however ask for some water.

"Are these all for me, Miss Minnie?" It wasn't lost on Rose that there were multiple gifts which hadn't been part of her pile until now.

"Yes; these are all birthday presents from Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, Miss. Granger, Ms. Weasley, Hagrid and myself." McGonagall showed them all to Rose who clearly had not thought there would be a chance for any of them to get her gifts since they were at school.

"Oh, thank you Miss Minnie!" Rose's eyes were twinkling as she tried to control her happiness, there was no need for any uncontrolled magic related incidents again.

"I hope you have a lovely day my dear." And with that, it was time for her to leave for Hogwarts.

Sirius walked McGonagall to the door once she had said her goodbyes to the other guests and with a word to him about not giving up hope, she apparated back to the school. The rest of the evening went by smoothly as was to be expected; there were games to play, dancing, not a lot of singing, but plenty of food and drink to go around for everyone. By sunset, Rose decided to ask Sirius if they were going to cut the cake before or _after_ dinner, which she couldn't wait for since it would mean waiting even longer to open all of her gifts… and there was only so much patience a 5 year old possessed.

"We can cut the cake now, love." Sirius chuckled, knowing this was as good a time as any for Rose to have cake.

"Yay!" Rose sighed in a happy relief, she didn't even know what her birthday cake _looked_ like, but not for long; she watched as Sirius went to the kitchen with Lupin while everyone gathered around the table.

However, before the two men could return to the dining room with Rose's cake, there came another unexpected arrival of not one but _two_ late guests! With a loud crack to announce that they had apparated inside the house, Fred and George found themselves directly in front of their parents who were surprised to say the least.

"Boys, what are you two doing here?" Molly spoke up first; to her knowledge, the twins were supposed to be at Hogwarts.

"Hello mum, dad! Fancy seeing you here." Fred said as he came up to shake hands with Rose, "Happy Birthday Rose! Sorry we're a bit late." He truly did look apologetic, but there was a hint of something else hidden behind his sad smile.

"Yeah, sorry about that, we were trying to make sure that your gift was ready on time." George, who Rose noticed was holding a… covered cage… came forward and shook hands, "Happy Birthday Rose!" He said and passed the cage to her.

"Thank you." The wonder in her eyes was mixed with confusion, but Rose felt glad to know that they had managed to find a way to be here for the party. She was also a little surprised to be holding something mysterious in her hands which didn't seem very heavy; but she did not get a chance to open it up just yet.

"Fred, George, why are you not at school?" Clearly, Molly had noticed that her sons had carefully avoided answering her question but she wasn't going to let this pass so easily.

"Ah, well you see mum… we had to be here to personally deliver Rose's birthday gift to her." This was George's reply, short and to the point without getting into any details.

"And we missed you and dad of course." Fred added in as an afterthought, hoping that it would help, although knowing his mother, it probably wouldn't.

"And _what_ is this gift exactly?" Molly had noticed the cage as soon as they had arrived and wanted to know what was inside; for Rose to have a pet at such a young age seemed like a good idea, but she couldn't be sure what Fred and George had brought with them.

"Funny you should ask…" The timing of Fred's answer coincided with the cage suddenly starting to rattle, which surprised Rose a little enough to step behind and bumped into Sirius who had returned with Lupin and the cake.

"What is in here?" Sirius asked, lifting the cage off Rose's hands, he could tell that had missed something important.

"Take a look, it's perfectly safe." George gestured to the older man, with a sincere smile.

It was Rose who took the leap of faith, figuratively of course, as she stood on her toes and without wasting any more time, removed the covering on the cage and gasped in surprise. Inside, there was a tiny, pink colored… thing… which looked tiny in size and shaped like a ball, with fur? Sirius still held onto it and seemed equally taken aback at the sight.

"What is that?" Tonks said, coming closer to see what this creature was; she had never seen anything like it before and knew that no one else had either.

"That looks very much like a Puffskein." Lupin replied, "A miniature one, but the color is different and they seem tame." He was fascinated by the reveal of this creature.

"Yep! They're called Pygmy Puffs." Fred said to them all, sounding proud. "And this is the first one of its kind."

"And how exactly did you boys come into possession of a… a… Pygmy Puff?" This time, it was Arthur who spoke up; he hadn't said anything while Molly questioned the twins on their unexpected arrival to Grimmauld Place, but now he needed to say something.

"Well… we have a special license to… ahem… breed them." George explained, realizing that there were a lot of Order members present who worked at the Ministry. "It is perfectly legal." He reiterated and exchanged a quick look with Fred.

"I like it!" Rose chimed in as she stared at the tiny Puff, it had two fairly big eyes which looked back at her but no longer was it moving about and rattling the cage.

" _She_ is the very first Pygmy Puff and she's all yours Rose." Fred couldn't tell if the atmosphere in the room would get any better; no other adult had commented on this yet, but seeing as it was Rose's birthday, perhaps he and his brother would have to deal with the situation a little later.

"Thank you." She looked up at Sirius who hadn't said a word, but when he nodded, Rose understood.

"So… what will you name her?" Tonks asked Rose, "She's a very cute and fluffy little thing isn't she?" It was not lost on her either that there was a certain sense of tension in the air, but perhaps she could help lighten the mood.

"Fluffy!" Rose's ears had perked up when she heard Tonks speaking and knew in that second it was the right name. "Fluffy Puff." She said with a big smile on her face.

"That's a good name." Turning to Lupin who still had the cake, Tonks knew it was time to focus on the party once more, "And here's your cake Rose!"

"Ah, yes… here we are." Lupin finally came forward to set the cake down on the table.

Rose, who had temporarily forgotten about her excitement over the birthday cake because of her new pet, soon discovered that this day was full of surprises; when she laid eyes on it and saw the beautiful design, she almost didn't want to ruin the cake by cutting it up! Sirius had baked her a special cake since he had said that turning five was a big deal - a red rose cake with green leaves on either side and one single candle shaped as the number 5 sat atop a silver stand, the words " _Happy Birthday Rose!_ " were written in pink icing just below the leaves in the center. Simple but pretty, just the way Rose had expected.

"Go on love, make a wish and blow out the candle." Sirius stood by her side as he picked up the knife and held it in his hand, helping Rose to cut the cake when she did blow on the candle after closing her eyes and making a wish.

Everyone gathered there clapped and broke into the birthday song as someone seemed to have magically burst a balloon which was filled with confetti. Amidst all the cheer, Rose laughed and smiled her biggest smile ever as she turned around on her chair to feed a bit of cake to Sirius first, followed by Tonks and Lupin. Once this part of celebrations was completed, about a quarter of an hour later, the gifts were ready to be opened. Since she had already received her gift from Fred and George, Rose thought to see what Harry and the others had sent across through McGonagall; sitting down on the floor of the study with Sirius, she reached for the pile of gifts from Hogwarts.

"This one's from Harry." Sirius said to her and passed a small slender box which reminded Rose of a similar looking gift in Sirius's pile of five.

Rose took the box in her hands and carefully began to tear the wrapping paper; she knew this was only the second of… _seventeen_ gifts, but she didn't want to rush through them all just yet. There was a card inside which she gave to Sirius to read.

"He says, ' _Happy Birthday Rose, I found this in Hogsmeade and I thought you might like it. Harry._ ' What is it?" Reading the message from his Godson, Sirius seemed curious since he hadn't heard about this gift in any of the letters Harry had sent him.

"It's… pretty!" Rose had opened the box to reveal a gold colored bracelet with tiny little charms.

Sirius could see that there was a rose, a teddy bear, a doll, an ice skate and a crown charm; but as his hands were full, Lupin did the honors of wearing the bracelet for Rose who seemed to be completely mesmerized by it.

"Looks like Harry's learning how to charm a girl." Sirius joked, causing everyone to laugh at his choice of words before he handed Rose the rest of her gifts.

She learned that Hermione had gifted her a book, but not just any book, this was Rose's very own copy of ' _Hogwarts: A History by Bathilda Bagshot_ ' which Sirius promised he would read to her at bedtime every night. Ron's gift turned out to be a Gobstones set, Ginny had bought a pretty looking doll and Hagrid had sent over a box of treacle fudge! But it was McGonagall's gift that surprised Rose; Wizard's Chess with the pieces made from marble and a note which said something about training to be as clever as her mother Evelyn had been at the game.

"Wow." Rose breathed in wonder when she turned to Molly and Arthur's gift; a pink and purple color bicycle which she could learn to ride all by herself. "Thank you!" She said, going over to hug them both.

"You're very welcome Rose." Molly kissed her cheek, "Happy Birthday."

"Who's next love?" Sirius called out, glancing at the bunch of unopened gifts, apart from his, there were still four more left.

"You're last!" In all honesty, Rose didn't know what to open next, but she did know that she was saving the best for the very end.

Eventually, she went with Mad-Eye's gift first and was amazed to see that he had gotten her a miniature sized telescope which worked just as well as a normal one would. After that, Rose opened Kingsley's gift which was a delight! He had found a stuffed toy of a Hippogriff which resembled Buckbeak and so she decided to name him _Beaky_. Now came the last two gifts, Tonks' and Lupin's; but Rose was so torn between choosing either of them that she asked Sirius to open one while she opened the other at the exact same time. When Rose saw that Lupin's gift turned out to be another stuffed toy, this time a wolf, she laughed and hugged him tight, thanking him over and over again, declaring that he would be called _Moony_!

"Oh." Rose had picked Tonks' gift which was very delicate according to the witch and after spending a few careful minutes, she saw at last that the gift was…

"It's a music box." Tonks said to her, reaching out to wind up the tiny little knob on one side and within seconds the room was filled with a soft instrumental tune.

"I know this song." The memory of hearing this very same song came to Rose as she listened to the music playing; it was the most wonderful feeling even if she couldn't remember the name. "My daddy used to sing it for me." She said softly, watching as the ballerina twirled around in the center of the box.

Soon, it was time for Rose to open the last of her gifts, five of them which were all from Sirius; he seemed to know which one she would go for first, but before that, perhaps it would be better to open the lesser important gift. And so, he handed her one of the square boxes which she quickly tore through and let out a tiny happy scream on seeing there was a _third_ stuffed animal for her… this time, it was a Unicorn and after debating on the name for several minutes, Rose decided on _Evie_. The next gift that Sirius gave her started to build up the excitement when she saw that it was a sleeveless black top with her name written in gold and the number 07 below.

"It's your Quidditch jersey." Sirius said, presenting her with the oddly shaped gift at last. "This should match with it don't you think love?" He knew that this one had been spoiled for Rose already but he could still see her bouncing with joy.

"Yes, yes, yes!" Rose didn't need to be told twice as she finally saw the broomstick revealed in all its glory, "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you Sirius!" She flung her arms around him in a tight hug.

"Ah, but wait… there's still two gifts left to go… and I think you will love these even more." He had been waiting until the last moment to pass over the last gifts to Rose and watched as she opened the smaller one first.

Inside the box which looked almost identical to the one which Harry had used for the charm bracelet, Rose saw something that she couldn't believe. Her heart seemed to stop for a second before starting again and beating faster as she gently lifted the piece of jewelry in her hands, showing it to everyone in the room; a silver chain with a heart shaped locket and the letter ' _E_ ' inscribed.

"This was my mommy's." Rose whispered, she had never seen her mother go a day without it, until that fateful day last July when Evelyn had forgotten to wear the necklace and left it behind at home. After, Rose didn't even remember where it was and thought the locket was lost forever… until now.

"I know." Sirius said in a soft voice, "I asked Mad-Eye to help me find it for you." He reached over and opened the locket to reveal that there was a picture of Rose and her parents.

It was in that moment did Rose realize something else; she hadn't been able to find any pictures from her old house when she had left… but Sirius seemed to be able to sense her thoughts, as he handed the last gift to her.

"This gift is from me and from everyone else." Was all that he needed to say.

Rose didn't have a clue about this gift and had no idea what to expect, but the moment she had opened it up and saw a big leather bound… book… all of the feelings and emotions that had been building up within her suddenly made her realize what this was; a photo album, one that was filled with pictures of Thomas and Evelyn. She didn't know how this was possible, she didn't even know that there were pictures of both her parents when they were younger, but the album had them all - several of Evelyn at Hogwarts, not as many of Thomas but enough, a wedding picture, some of Rose too - The McKinnon family. And for a long time, Rose sat there without saying a word as she flipped through the album in its entirety, feeling the tears threatening to fall from her eyes, but not actually crying, because she knew that her parents would have wanted her to keep on smiling, especially on her birthday; Sirius would also have wanted the same, and so she smiled… seeing the moving pictures looking back at her… seeing her mother and father… seeing the happy memories which she didn't have to worry about remembering all by herself now that she had the pictures to remind her. And when she was done, Rose looked up to meet Sirius's gaze, knowing there was no need for words as she kissed his cheek in thanks.

"Happy Birthday Rose." Sirius whispered and kissed her forehead.

Later that night, after the party had officially ended and everyone had left, Sirius gathered up all of Rose's birthday gifts with her help and carried them to their room; he spent a half hour reading to her from the book as promised before tucking her into bed, with each of the three stuffed animals, a doll, as well as Fluffy the Pygmy Puff by her side. And as he began to turn off all the lights save for one, Sirius began to hum a familiar tune, the one from that music box, which Thomas had always sung to her. The song which he would now sing for her, always.


	15. Chapter 14

"Is Beaky going to be okay?" Rose asked Sirius, sounding scared for the Hippogriff; she had grown fond of Buckbeak over the past several months and to suddenly see him injured was frightening.

"He's a strong animal love, he'll be okay in no time. Don't worry." Sirius, who looked grim, sat down beside Buckbeak as he tended to the creature's wounds.

There was not much for Rose to do as she stood next to Sirius, save being able to keep Buckbeak calm. She was slowly caressing his feathers while Sirius worked with bandages and magic; there was blood on the wooden floor but Rose did her best not to look at it.

They had no idea how something like this could have occurred. This morning had started off as usual, just a regular June day, with the two of them waking up and making breakfast together before checking in on Buckbeak and he most certainly had not been injured then; it seemed that somewhere between late afternoon and early evening when Sirius and Rose were relaxing in the library did something happen. And yet, no one had visited the house all day long… not even Mundungus… which meant that there was only one explanation for this.

"Rose. I need you to go and find Kreacher.  _Now_." He spoke softly but in a firm tone and when Rose heard him call her by her name, she realized what he was trying to say.

"Okay…" Rose was a little worried now, she hadn't seen Kreacher around very much lately but if he was here and had done this to Buckbeak, it was hard for her to understand why. She trusted Sirius and knew that even though he was upset, maybe there was a simple answer to all of this.

However, just as Rose started to head downstairs and go searching for Kreacher, the door suddenly was thrown open as Lupin entered, looking worried. He was wringing his hands and the moment Sirius stood up and turned to face his friend, Rose could tell that something was very wrong.

"Moony? What is it? What's wrong?" Wiping the blood from his hands, Sirius stepped away from Buckbeak and observed Remus closely; he hadn't seen his friend like this in a long time.

"It's Harry." Lupin said, as he tried to remain calm and explain what he had only just learned himself a few minutes ago.

"What happened to Harry? Is he okay? Where is he?" Sirius was seconds away from bursting out the door and running out of the house, but he needed to know where Harry was before he did anything rash.

"He's trying to get to the Ministry. Something happened while he was giving his O.W.L.s. and Snape said…" Tensions were already running high in the room and once Lupin mentioned Snape's name, Sirius interrupted him before he could say anything else.

" _Snape_? What does he know?" Frowning deeply as he tried to make sense of what Lupin was trying to tell him, Sirius didn't understand what Snape had to do with all of it.

"He's here. He told us that Harry had some vision… of you being tortured at the Ministry… Dumbledore thinks that Voldemort is going to attack." That was all Lupin managed to say before Sirius didn't hear anything else as he ran downstairs.

Rose followed them hastily, wondering what had happened to Harry… this day was starting to be a stressful one for everybody. She heard Lupin saying something about the Ministry and Dumbledore's name but didn't know what it meant. In no time, Sirius had already reached the living room and saw Tonks, Mad-Eye, Kingsley and… Snape standing there, getting ready to… fight? Whatever was going on with Harry, it was a serious matter no doubt. Rose had never seen Snape very often for she would retreat to her bedroom whenever there were Order meetings and he was not one to stay behind afterwards like the others would.

"Black! What the hell do you think you're doing?" Snape sneered at Sirius when he saw the other man starting to join the group.

"I'm going after Harry." Sirius said bluntly, not caring about why Snape was in his house. He didn't know anything but the fact that he  _had_  to go and help his Godson.

" _No._ " It was one word, but Rose could hear the tone in Snape's voice and knew that things were getting much more intense.

"I wasn't asking for your permission Snivellus." Snapping his head to glare at Snape, Sirius scoffed, not wanting to waste his energy arguing with him of all people. Harry was his only concern right now.

"Dumbledore's orders are for you to stay put Black. He's on his way here and I'm sure he'll be more than happy to explain everything to you." Snape wasn't about to back down; he was here at this time only because Dumbledore had ordered him, regardless of his own opinion about the foolishness that Harry was getting himself involved in.

"I'm not going to sit around and just be ordered around by everyone! My Godson is in danger right now; he has no idea what he's walking into and if you don't get out of my way Snape, you're going to regret it." Sirius's voice rose as his temper started to flare up; he  _wasn't_  going to let anything happen to Harry if there was something he could do to stop him.

"Sirius… maybe there's a way to stop Harry before he does something reckless." Lupin placed a hand on his shoulder, hoping to talk some sense into his friend. "Snape said that he saw Harry and Hermione going into the Forbidden Forest with Umbridge; they were being detained by her. Maybe he's back at the Castle now." He knew that the others were watching Sirius carefully, seeing him act first and think later; it was dangerous waters, but Lupin only wanted to make sure that they had all the facts before rushing in blindly.

"The mirror." Sirius breathed, "I can talk to Harry and tell him that I'm right here and I'm okay then maybe…" And suddenly, for a second, everything was calm once more.

"What is he talking about Remus?" Kingsley suddenly spoke up, having watched this entire panicked exchange playing itself out.

"It's a two way mirror." Sirius explained as he crossed the room, opening all the drawers, trying to remember where he had left his half. "I gave one to Harry before he left for Hogwarts after Christmas. We haven't really used it… keep missing each other… but maybe he has it on him now." Tossing everything out, his frustration started to return when he couldn't find the mirror anywhere.

Rose, who was standing on the staircase, looking at Sirius frantically searching for something suddenly realized what he meant by two way mirror. It was that tiny piece of glass which he carried in his pockets sometimes; he had told her about the magic behind it and how two pieces were able to be used to talk with someone else. She also knew exactly where this object was at this very moment and ran back upstairs as fast as she could.

"Mirror or no mirror, we have to go and check out the Ministry; make sure there are no Death Eaters waiting for Harry to suddenly show up." They were all prepared for any danger that they would possibly face and Kingsley was certainly taking charge of this operation now.

"How is he going to do that?" Tonks chimed in at last, "I mean, Harry can't apparate yet and there's no way to get to the Ministry without help." She tried to sound hopeful but realized that after everything she'd heard about Harry from Sirius and Remus, it was probably not so simple.

"Unfortunately Harry can be very clever when it comes to situations like this; if he's already with Hermione and meets up with Ron, there is no telling what the three of them will think of." Lupin started to say, "I fear that if Harry believes that Sirius is in danger, he will find a way to the Ministry… we just have to make sure it's not too late."

"Wait!" Rose suddenly called out, as she reappeared, holding the mirror in her hands. "I found it." She hopped down the stairs and ran over to Sirius, who instinctively kissed the top of her forehead.

"Thank you love." He said to her, sighing in relief as he truly felt glad to know that she was here with him.

She didn't say anything else but watched as Sirius attempted to use the mirror to try and contact Harry. The next few minutes were agonizingly long as everyone waited with bated breaths for an answer; Snape was the only one who made his impatience show even though he remained silent. When Rose saw Sirius hesitate on the fifth try, she knew that maybe this was not going to work and she didn't know what else to do.

"Let's go." He said at last, handing the mirror to Remus who took it without question; Sirius wasn't about to waste anymore time.

"Sirius… are you sure…" Kingsley began to say but this time it was Moody who cut him off.

"There's no time to sit around, if the boy's in danger then we could use Sirius's help." Mad-Eye was not one to prolong this either and he knew it was pointless to try and reason with Sirius.

"I'm coming. Harry's my Godson." There was no need for any other explanation on Sirius's part; he could be stubborn when he wanted to and knew the dangers of leaving the house, but he was doing it for Harry.

"What about the girl? Are you just going to  _leave_  her here?" Snape had no reason to bring up Rose's name other than the fact that he knew she was under Sirius's care as well.

Rose perked up when she heard Snape mention her and suddenly all the adults were looking at her. She didn't know what to say; it was obvious that everyone was planning on leaving now to go after Harry and there was no chance that Sirius would take her with him because of the danger. And he seemed to sense the dilemma he was in now, for he took the moment to kneel down in front of her, holding both hands in his as he tried to figure out a solution to this problem.

"Rose… love, I need you to do something for me." Sirius said, "I have to go and help Harry now, and I want you to go upstairs to Buckbeak's room and wait there until I return." He explained to her, "The house is safe, there's magic everywhere. Can you do this?" The pain in his eyes showed that he didn't want to do this, that he was torn, that he didn't know what else to do.

"Yes. I will." Nodding her head, Rose understood what she was being asked to do. She wouldn't be alone if she was with Buckbeak.

"Good girl." Managing a half-smile, Sirius was about to leave when Rose suddenly grabbed his wrist and opened her mouth to say something.

"Will you come back?" She asked him directly, not shying away from the fear that had been building in her heart for a few minutes now.

"Yes. I will… I promise you." Sirius hesitated for a split second before he made her the promise but he meant what he said. "I'm coming back, love." He understood what she was going through and knew that no matter the dangers which lay ahead for him, Rose was counting on him to return.

There was no reason for her to doubt his words, she believed in him more than anyone else in the world and so, Rose simply hugged Sirius quickly as she watched him leave with the others. It took them only a few seconds to apparate away to the Ministry, but when she turned around to head upstairs to Buckbeak's room, Rose bumped into… Snape. He hadn't left with the rest of the Order, instead was standing there staring at her in a curious way and when she dared to glance up at him, Snape finally let out a sigh before taking one of her hands in his.

"Dumbledore said that if Black did anything reckless then you're safer at Hogwarts. Come on." The way his voice sounded so… disinterested did not surprise Rose as much as the order that Dumbledore had given him. To bring her back to the castle, it would be much more safer than the house indeed.

"I'm coming." Rose would have rather not said anything at all, she couldn't figure out why Snape seemed to be like this every single time she had encountered him, but she knew her manners and that they applied to everyone.

Without another word, Snape apparated with Rose to the outskirts of the Hogwarts grounds where the wards ended, and she barely had a chance to take in the breathtaking sight before the man in front of her started to walk on ahead, leaving Rose no choice but to hasten her footsteps as she followed him up the long path towards the castle. As she passed by Hagrid's hut, the surprising silence that lay all around stunned her; there was something in the air even here which made her shiver, despite the warm temperature of the evening. By the time she had set foot inside the Great Hall and Snape left abruptly, Rose let out a deep breath she'd held in at some point… turning around to take in the grandness of everything… it had almost been a whole year since her last visit here and nothing was different, except the fact that tonight, her heart was heavy with thoughts of Sirius and Harry and everyone else and the fear of the unknown. She couldn't know what they were going through at the very moment that she was safe within the castle walls but she could hope for them to return safely.

""Hello there." A voice suddenly spoke up from somewhere nearby and Rose blinked twice at the shimmering form that had appeared out of nowhere, before remembering that this was one of the Ghosts, Sir Nicholas, or Sir Nick to her.

"Hello Sir Nick!" Rose waved to him, feeling a moment's relief as she realized that there was someone else apart from herself… she hadn't seen Dumbledore nor any of the Professor's and neither were any students around, but at least the Ghosts were.

"Ah! Miss Rose, forgive me, it took me a minute to recall your name… what brings you back to Hogwarts tonight?" Sir Nicholas or as he was more commonly known as Nearly-Headless Nick smiled at the little girl; the castle was unusually quiet after everything that had happened but seeing Rose again was always pleasant.

"I… umm… I don't know, Dumbledore Sir said to come here." It was all Rose really knew for sure, but even as she answered Sir Nicholas, she saw that the Ghost seemed to understand.

"Well then, will you permit me to keep you company until you learn more?" The ghost of Gryffindor had experienced many things in his life and even after, spending the past several decades at Hogwarts, Sir Nicholas knew there were always going to be secrets.

"I would like that very much." Rose said as she smiled for the first time that day.

"Splendid!" And with that, Sir Nicholas floated away towards one of the House tables, there was no point in letting a child stand on her feet until someone approached her with news. "Are you hungry Miss Rose? I can find the Fat Friar to call on the Elves for some supper." He asked her once she had sat down.

"Oh… yes please… I am a little hungry." In all honesty, Rose couldn't remember eating anything after breakfast and since she had nothing else to do but wait, a little food in her would help to stay awake and keep her mind off the worrying thoughts for a while longer.

"I shall return momentarily." Sir Nicholas bowed to her and disappeared as he usually did, but now Rose didn't feel lonely anymore.

Within minutes, the table was magically filled with heaps and heaps of food for Rose to choose from, though she ate a little, it was more than enough for now. After she was done, Sir Nicholas returned with two surprise visitors in tow… Dobby and Winky the House Elves! They were delighted to meet her once again and Rose was glad for even more company as time wore on. Night soon fell and the two elves bade Rose goodnight as they had to return to the kitchens; she didn't mind having some time alone to herself. Sighing softly, she stood up from the table at last and walked to the big windows through which she could see everything; being at Hogwarts certainly made her feel safe and it was peaceful, but it wasn't Grimmauld Place, it wasn't home.

Rose did not move from her spot as she sat down on the cold marble floor and stared out the window, watching the moon and the clouds, searching for the stars and wishing with all her heart that Sirius, Harry, Lupin, Tonks and everyone else would return soon. In spite of the restlessness she'd felt, the idea of walking up and down around the entire Great Hall didn't sound like a good idea. The worrying thoughts which had been on the back of her mind started all evening started to resurface again - what was happening with Harry? Was he okay? What about his friends? Had Sirius reached them in time? Was he safe? Rose couldn't stop herself from thinking these questions, but she certainly could try and stay hopeful that everything would turn out for the best. She didn't know how much time had passed, but just as she started to feel that her eyes were closing; there was a noise which startled her awake.

"Hello?" Rose called out softly, wondering if one of the Professor's had come to check on her, "Miss Minnie, is that you?" She didn't know where McGonagall was, but maybe it was Snape?

Silence. A heartbeat. Two heartbeats. Three heartbeats and still nothing; there was no other sound and no one had entered the Great Hall either, which meant that Rose had no reason to be nervous… and yet, she slowly got to her feet and carefully started to walk across towards the oak doors which would take her to the Entrance Hall. She couldn't have been more than twenty feet away when the doors opened of their own accord and a tall figure strode in.

"Hello Rose." It was Dumbledore; of all the people that Rose expected to see, she had not thought about the Headmaster himself, having not seen or heard from him ever since she'd arrived.

"Dumbledore Sir!" She exclaimed loudly, relieved to see a familiar face after what had felt like forever.

Running over to him, Rose didn't hesitate before hugging the old Wizard. There were so many questions in her mind, where he had been, where the others were, if Harry was alright, but the only one which mattered was…

"Sirius! Is he… where is he Dumbledore Sir?" Rose wasn't about to let her worst fears come true; all the time that Sirius had been gone, she believed with all her heart that he was going to come back.

"He is here. And so is everyone else, they are in the Hospital Wing." Dumbledore said mysteriously; from the light emitting from his wand, Rose could tell that he looked tired… as if he had been in a fight too.

"Is everyone okay?" She couldn't imagine why _all_ of them were there, what had happened at the Ministry? She still had so many questions, but if Sirius was here then she had to see him immediately.

"They are safe." Was all the old wizard would say in reply, but it was the fact that he didn't tell her more, especially about Sirius, had Rose running off towards the Hospital Wing; she didn't even remember where she had to go, but thankfully as she hurried through the dimly lit corridors, past all the moving portraits, Sir Nicholas materialized and led the way, as if he had heard everything and knew where Rose needed to be.

"Please, please… please be okay." Rose whispered over and over again as she ran. Her heart was racing and all sorts of fearful thoughts were flooding her mind but she pushed them aside and focused on Sirius.

It didn't take her too long to finally reach the Hospital Wing thanks to Sir Nicholas's guidance and after thanking him, she slowed down and caught her breath before walking inside, seeing at least half a dozen people. Her eyes immediately scanned the room and saw the extent of injuries that the others had sustained - Ron was half conscious but had scary markings on his arms that looked like veins, the boy on the other bed beside him had to be Neville, she had heard all about him all year long; he was holding a handkerchief to his nose which was no longer bleeding but seemed broken, Ginny had a bandage on her ankle and mostly looked sleepy, the girl with dirty blonde hair by Ginny's bed would be Luna who did not have any signs of injuries… and Hermione seemed to be asleep. There was no sign of Harry, but on the far side of the room, Rose finally noticed Sirius… laying on a bed… and not moving.

"Sirius!" Rose cried out when she saw him and didn't think twice before running to his bed in a state of panic.

"My dear child…" Madam Pomfrey, who had just finished tending to Sirius was taken aback when she saw Rose climb on the bed, but just as she looked to Dumbledore, who had quietly followed behind, he merely shook his head, she didn't say anything else.

"What is wrong with him?" Her fingers were inches away from touching his cheek, but Rose was trying to check his signs of breathing and almost collapsed on top of Sirius when she was sure he was still alive.

"He's been injured, a lot." Dumbledore answered her softly, "Madam Pomfrey has him stabilized but the toll of the fight was too much for Sirius… he's unconscious… for now."

Rose wasn't listening to what Dumbledore was telling her, all she knew was that Sirius was here with her and that he hadn't broken his promise. Neither was she aware of everyone else's eyes on her as she stayed there by his side without another word. After that, there was little else to be done; Dumbledore stayed for a few more minutes, observing his students and telling them that Harry was in his office, before leaving the Hospital Wing to go speak with him.

A short time later, Rose was vaguely aware of the other patients falling asleep one by one and the candles being blown out, but her attention didn't waver from Sirius as she sat there, staring at him with wide eyes as she took in the extent of his injuries. She could see a lot of bandages across his chest which were covered in splashes of red… blood… there was also a cut on his forehead which thankfully didn't look too deep, but apart from that, there were no other physical signs of the damage he'd sustained; all she wanted to know… what she needed to see was the slight rise and fall of his chest as he breathed on his own. With nothing else for Rose to do but wait patiently for Sirius to regain consciousness, no matter how long it took, she soon lay down on the bed and leaned into him, resting a hand over his heart, feeling it beating under her fingers, letting sleep overtake her as the events of that day caught up at last.


	16. Chapter 15

_Death Eaters. They were all surrounded by Death Eaters; Remus, Tonks, Kingsley and Mad-Eye... fighting against Malfoy, Bellatrix and the others... Harry and his friends had been injured already. He could see himself dodging curses and casting spells in defense of the attacks that kept coming his way... Bellatrix... she was laughing maniacally as she tried to steal the object that Harry held in his hands... he had to protect his Godson, no matter what. James and Lily were counting on him... to keep Harry safe. Then suddenly someone shouted Dumbledore's name; if he was here then the fight would be over soon... but before he could do anything, Bellatrix shot a spell his way which he barely managed to dodge._

_"Come on! You can do better than that!" He heard himself taunting her, which didn’t help him at all._

_After that, the last thing he could remember was Bellatrix attacking him again.... followed by darkness... and pain… so much pain… he didn't know what had happened, was he falling? Dying perhaps... it felt cold, but he could still think, could sense the pain… but for the first time in his life, he knew that there was something to live for, someone to live for, a lot of people were depending on him to be there for them - his Godson, his best friend, his cousin and... and Rose. That sweet, kindhearted, beautiful five year old girl who always had a smile on her face, who had no one else to turn to, who had gone above and beyond to make him laugh, she was counting on him… to come home… to her. He couldn’t let Rose down, not when he promised her that he would return; if anything happened to him, she would be all alone..._

“Rose!” Sirius called out, breaking through the darkness that had held him down as he opened his eyes, very much alive.

Breathing heavily, Sirius squinted his eyes against the glare of the sunlight, streaming in through familiar looking windows. He was sitting in a bed, dressed in a hospital gown? This wasn't St. Mungo's, it felt... homely; like the Hospital Wing at Hogwarts. It had been almost 20 years since he’d set foot in the Castle and yet, nothing much had changed… he _really_ was here.

“What?” He couldn't believe that this was possible; he was alive and inside the school?

Just then, Sirius realized that he wasn't alone; laying by the foot of his bed, curled up beside his legs... Rose was fast asleep. She hadn't heard him shout for her, but she was here; seeing her like that, so peaceful, it warmed his heart. What she had done for him, what she continued to do… Rose was the reason he had fought to stay alive.

_“Maybe I'm dreaming and this is what Heaven looks like.”_ The thought crossed his mind as Sirius reached a hand out to touch Rose's head.

Before he could do or even say anything, to wake Rose up, there was a voice that brought Sirius out of his daze.

“Ah, Sirius. You're awake.” Dumbledore spoke softly as he entered the room.

“Dumbledore!” Sirius exclaimed, touching his chest, seeing the bandages and sensing pain, whatever numbness had been there earlier started to dissipate, “You... what is going on? where am I? Harry! Is he all right?” He did remember the fight inside the Department of Mysteries, but couldn't recall all of the details though. The last thing his mind could comprehend was Bellatrix attacking him… her laughter echoing in his ears. His memories were a bit mixed up; when he touched his forehead he felt a bandage there, and his arms were also covered in minor cuts and scratches which were already starting to heal themselves.

“Harry is resting in the Gryffindor Tower with his friends; he is quite alright as is everyone else. There’s no need to worry, everything is over for now.” Sitting down on a chair beside Sirius’s bed, Dumbledore kept his voice low so as to not wake Rose who was oblivious to the new visitor there.

“What does that mean?” Frowning at the old wizard, Sirius couldn’t bring himself to entirely tear his gaze away from Rose; he was not sure how he had reached Hogwarts, but seeing her sleeping was already calming his nerves.

“The Death Eaters were caught after I arrived, unfortunately Bellatrix Lestrange and Voldemort managed to escape.” Dumbledore began to explain, “There was a lot of confusion over what happened to you Sirius, but from what I have been told, it seems to me that Remus Lupin is responsible for deflecting that last attack Bellatrix cast your way.” He said to Sirius.

“Remus saved me?” Sirius was not surprised to hear the Headmaster’s words, he had always known that once they were able to put all past grievances aside, Lupin was his best friend who would lay down his life for him… and vice versa.

“Indeed. Although, it seems that even after you were hit with a stunning spell, Bellatrix was successful in using the Sectumsempra spell on you.” Dumbledore’s voice was very grim when he explained the true extent of injuries that Sirius had sustained, “That is why you were unconscious for some time… but Madam Pomfrey assures me the worst has already healed.”

Sirius barely registered the Headmaster’s words for as soon as he heard of ‘Sectumsempra’ he couldn’t help but vaguely recall the memory of agonizing pain which tore through his body, lying on the stone ground by that archway, and realized that’s why his chest had a dull ache… but he had to force those thoughts away and focus on what was important.

“Is Tonks okay? She wasn’t hurt was she?” Sirius needed to know that his cousin was fine; he worried about her more than she would ever realize.

“Ah… well, it seems that she did sustain some injuries, having been knocked out by Bellatrix before you; rest assured, young Miss Nymphadora was sent to St. Mungo’s to recover for a few days and she has returned this morning.” Dumbledore was aware of how deep Sirius’s concern ran for Tonks. “Remus and the others are all here, resting in their respective Houses ever since the chaos died down.” He added. The members of the Order were safe now.

“How… how long has it been since the attack at the Ministry?” Sirius asked when he heard that Tonks had been in St. Mungo’s for _days_ , and just as he was about to bolt from his bed to go and see her, he realized something that hadn’t struck him until now… him being here at Hogwarts posed a risk. Not just to him or the others, but to Rose.

“Three days.” Was Dumbledore’s immediate reply; the older Wizard did not seem to sense Sirius’s fears for he said nothing else.

“ _Three_? And Rose…” Sirius turned to look at her properly now, not knowing what else to say. Just thinking if she had stayed here in the hospital wing while he was unconscious, he still was amazed at how much _she_ worried about him.  

“Miss McKinnon has never left your side for more than a few minutes since your arrival at Hogwarts, Sirius.” He could now see the worry reflected in Sirius’s gaze on Rose as she continued to sleep even now, “She has grown quite fond of you… and seems very much like her aunt does she not?” This was the first time that Dumbledore had brought up Marlene’s name, but having spent a few days around Rose, even he had seen aspects of Marlene in the child.

“She is like Marlene in some ways yes.” Nodding his head in agreement, Sirius seemed to be talking more to himself now, “A very special child too. She has so much compassion and love and cheerfulness even after losing both her parents at such a young age… I have learned a lot from Rose.” He was thinking about how she had changed his life since that first night they’d met at his house and everything the two of them had gone through together since then.

“As I’m sure she has learned a lot from you.” Watching Sirius from behind his half-moon glasses, Dumbledore knew that sending Rose to live with Sirius had proven to be beneficial for them both.

“I haven’t been the best role model before… but I am trying my best…” Sirius confessed, “I don’t have a lot to offer her, even now… we shouldn’t be here.” Glancing at Dumbledore for a moment, Sirius wondered how he was still at Hogwarts when the risk of him being exposed was very high.

“Ah, yes. I had forgotten to tell you about that.” Dumbledore started to say as he pulled out an envelope from his robes, “It seems to me that your situation has changed; after the events that occurred, there has been a development with regards to… well, everything.” There was a hint of a smile on the old wizard's face.

Sirius was confused on hearing Dumbledore’s words, but took the envelope and saw that it was addressed to him; only when he turned it around to see the Minister of Magic’s seal at the back, did he realize what this possibly could be.

“What is this?” The disbelief in his voice was apparent as he started to open the envelope, surely it was impossible. And yet, the only reason Sirius would be receiving a letter from the Minister personally meant…

“I believe that it is a formal pardon from Cornelius Fudge himself. For the wrongful imprisonment of an innocent man, who has been cleared of all charges against him.” Knowing that Sirius wouldn’t believe anything unless he heard it from him, Dumbledore explained the contents of this letter.

“But… how…?” Sirius couldn’t begin to fathom a world where he was finally granted his freedom, after all these years, could this be real?

“There is to be an official inquiry over the next several weeks but Cornelius was provided with strong evidence as to your innocence.” The Headmaster wasn’t going to bother him with technicalities just yet, he knew how important this was to Sirius.

“Then this means… that I’m… _free_.” Shock, surprise and wonder filled Sirius as he was processing the words that were written in the letter.

“Yes, as free as we all are at this stage of the battle. The danger is very much prevalent even now; Voldemort is out in the open and there will be a reckoning. Harry needs all of our support if he is to face the future that lies ahead.” Dumbledore knew that Sirius would be ready when the time came, and there was much to discuss, but it could wait for another day.

“I will do whatever it takes to help my Godson, but I do have to think of Rose as well now.” Sirius said without hesitating; he knew the responsibilities which he had to fulfill and would always support Harry, but there was another person whom he had to think about, to take care of and protect at all costs.

And it was at that moment when Sirius saw Rose begin to stir from her sleep. She yawned as she rubbed her eyes, having slept peacefully throughout Sirius and Dumbledore’s conversation without being disturbed. As soon as she saw that he was awake, Rose jumped up from her spot at the foot of his bed and immediately launched herself into his arms.

“Sirius!” She exclaimed with a loud shout of glee and hugged him tightly, “You’re okay!” Rose buried her head in his shoulder, squeezing both arms closer to make sure that he was really there.

“Hello love, I am alright now. It’s all over. I'm here.” Sirius said as caressed Rose’s hair, feeling the relief and happiness flood him as he held onto her.

“I’ll leave you two alone, and I will let the others know that you are awake.” Dumbledore said to Sirius as he stood up to give them some privacy.

“Thank you Dumbledore Sir.” Turning around so that she could see the Headmaster but not wanting to let go of Sirius, Rose beamed brightly when she saw him leaving.

Now that it was just the two of them, Rose buried her head in Sirius’s shoulder and sighed happily, breathing in his scent - to others he may have smelled of firewhisky and... winter. When everything loses color and hope. When there is no warmth. But to her, in that moment, he radiated warmth. Warmth and safety. And maybe, just maybe, it was time for spring now. He was her home.

“Are you okay Sirius?” Rose whispered as she pulled back to look at him in wonder, she had waited for three days for him to wake up and now that he had, she felt properly relaxed for the first time since then.

“Yes, I am.” Meeting her gaze, Sirius smiled knowing that she was always going to worry about him. “I am sorry if I scared you, Dumbledore told me that you’ve stayed here by my side?” He knew Remus must have made sure she ate and slept on time, but he also worried about her.

“It’s okay… I did not want to leave you alone.” She replied, understanding how important the mission had been for him. “I wanted to take care of you like you take care of me.” Rose added with a smile of her own.

For a heartbeat, he stared at the child in his arms and not for the first time, wondered to himself how he had been so fortunate to have met her; Rose was a blessing to him, something that Sirius felt he never properly expressed… until….

“I love you Rose.” Sirius said at last, knowing full well that this was his first actual confession of his feelings toward her out loud, it certainly was well overdue, but he knew that she had never thought otherwise; this just felt like the right moment to say those three words, eight letters.

“I love you too Sirius.” Rose didn’t need to hide her look of happiness as she heard those words from Sirius, but there was nothing else that she needed to say to him about it.

The two of them smiled and embraced each other once more as Sirius kissed her on the head, making a silent promise to himself that he would never leave her alone after today, not unless it was time to face the battles which lay ahead. They stayed that way in a comfortable silence for a few moments until Sirius sensed that someone had entered the Hospital Wing; turning in the direction of the entrance, he expected to see Madam Pomfrey, but saw that Dumbledore had returned.

“There was one last thing, Sirius.” The old wizard started to say, “Dear me, I do seem to be forgetting all the important things today… perhaps a sherbet lemon will do me some good.” Dumbledore chuckled to himself, “The matter which we had discussed earlier has been approved.” This time, there was a scroll of parchment that he handed over to Sirius.

“I thought… but what of the difficulties we talked about?” Sirius was amazed at how quickly the Headmaster had worked to make these things possible; first his freedom and now this… he wasn’t sure how to feel… there had never been so many good things coming in his life for a long time, not since Rose had found her way to him.

“It has all been taken care of. Amelia Bones was kind enough to help us out." Dumbledore had agreed to offer his assistance to Sirius when they had conversed several weeks ago via Professor McGonagall. “I wish you luck.” He said before speaking to Rose, “I trust that you will take care of Sirius, won’t you? Good day.” Saying so, Dumbledore left the Hospital Wing.

“What was that?” Rose asked Sirius, she faced him now but still had her arms wrapped around his neck.

“That... that was a surprise. For you, love. A late birthday gift.” Sirius replied as he sat her on his lap before moving to open the scroll.

“But I have many gifts. You got me the pictures of Momma and Daddy and all the other things.” She was a little confused, but mostly curious as to what sort of gift this piece of parchment could be.

“Yes, you are right about that.” He smiled at her, “This is another gift that I hope you will like just as much.” Sirius could sense his own fears as he unraveled the document; he and Rose hadn't had a chance to properly talk about this, but he believed that she would agree with his decision.

“Show me! I will like it.” Rose sat sideways on his lap so that she could see Sirius and the scroll in his hands.

Without saying anything else, he opened it up and showed Rose exactly what this was. A lengthy document with words all over, from top to bottom, most of which Rose knew she couldn't read easily; she still reached out to look at it closer and saw her name mentioned there, as well as Sirius's.

“Is it a story?” Rose was able to decipher a title at the top. “A... D... O…” She hadn't heard of a word like this before.

“No, it isn't a story.” Sirius started to say, “It... well it is an important paper from the Ministry... a form to adopt someone.” He hesitated for a second before explaining what that meant. “I know that we have known each other for only a year now, and I know it is not the same as having your family... but there is a process, in the Wizard and Muggle community, where a child can be adopted... to find a new family…” If he was being honest with himself, Sirius had no problem admitting that he felt worried about what Rose would think.

“A new family. For me?” Rose frowned as she tried to understand what Sirius was trying to tell her, putting the pieces together. “You. You will be my new Dad?” She looked into his eyes when she spoke.

“I know that things have been different for you... and I know that you miss your parents... but I can adopt you and I won't replace them, but it would be like having a second father... if you will have me.” Sirius was well aware of the letter that Thomas and Evelyn had written with the legal will for him to be Rose's guardian, but he wanted her approval for this before it became official.

“Are you not my Dad from before?” It was an innocent question that Rose asked Sirius, but the meaning behind it was clear - she had already been thinking of him as her Dad.

They had never found an opportunity to call each other by the title of 'father' and 'daughter' all this while, but there was that unspoken agreement between them for as long as either one could remember. And to Sirius, when he heard Rose say that... the first time she called him 'Dad', he wanted to hear it for the rest of his life.

“Yes, yes. I am.” His voice was beginning to choke up as he nodded, “And you have been my daughter from before too. We still need to sign our names here; there is a magic to it - once you sign this document, we will be a real family. I don't have to hide anymore, I am... free.” The word felt much more strange to Sirius than the word 'daughter' did; although perhaps that was because he really had always thought of her as his own for many months now.

“Then I can call you Dad?” Rose knew that she had never said it out loud, because she was not sure if that was what Sirius wanted. She wouldn't doubt his commitment to taking care of her, but it was like he said, this would make everything official.

“You can call me anything you want Rose.” This was only the second time that Rose had used this new name for him and Sirius was already used to it.

“Do I have a new name?” She certainly had a lot of questions about this process and Sirius was happy to answer all of them for her.

“Only your last name will change to mine.” He replied, waiting to see what Rose thought of that.

“Marlene Rose Black. I like it.” Without thinking twice, she tried her new name and smiled when she heard how it sounded to her ears.

“I like it too.” Sirius admitted; there was a part of him that _did_ find it a little surreal to know that Rose was part of his family now, but knew that he would adjust in no time, just as she would too.

She beamed brightly as Sirius picked up the quill at last, exchanged a glance with her and then signed his name. Rose watched with eyes wide open as the parchment glowed a gold light where Sirius's name was; when she took hold of the quill from him and started to write her name, Rose realized that this was a mere formality, for she had never thought of Sirius as anyone but her new Dad. She was aware that her parents were not with her anymore but they would certainly want her to be happy and have a family that would love her as much as they had.

“Well that's that.” Sirius said when Rose had finished and the magic had made it legal now.

He started to roll up the parchment, leaving it aside for the moment, when all of a sudden, Rose made a move to hug him again. The two of them stayed that way, without needing to say anything, embracing each other for a few minutes until Madam Pomfrey showed up; she had been busy visiting all the other Order members and checking up on their condition before coming back to the Hospital Wing. She was absolutely delighted to meet Sirius again and chatted with him about how much Rose had helped her take care of him. It didn't take her long to declare that he was in good health and ready to be dismissed, telling him that there was a room made up for him and Rose in the Gryffindor Tower where Harry, Ron, Ginny and Hermione were asleep at this time in their respective dormitories.

“What of Lupin and Tonks?” Sirius wondered out loud as he finally stood up, stretching his muscles, walking up and down the room.

“Remus asked if he could help me with my other patients; I was in the Hufflepuff Tower checking up on Nymphadora last. He may still be there; a lot of his time was divided between traveling to St. Mungo’s and here.” Madam Pomfrey replied nonchalantly, as she observed Sirius.

“Is Mad-Eye still here?” Dumbledore had told him that everyone who was at the Ministry was in the school, but Sirius wondered if Mad-Eye had probably returned to work already.

“I believe Professor Dumbledore asked him to personally escort Neville Longbottom home to his grandmother.” The matron watched as Sirius showed full signs of recovery and was glad to see him walking about. “And Kingsley has gone to escort Miss Lovegood home. He and Alastor should return soon.” Madam Pomfrey added, knowing that Sirius was concerned about his friends.

“Neville and Luna came to say goodbye to me.” Rose suddenly chimed in; she’d sat down at the edge of the bed now.

“What of Minerva? Is she still at St. Mungo’s?” Sirius wasn’t sure who had told him about McGonagall’s attack, but he remembered that she had been transferred to the other Hospital that same night before Tonks… had it only been four days ago?

“No, Professor McGonagall returned here yesterday; she’s in perfect health now. Still, I advised her to stay in her chambers for a week to recover completely.” And just as Madam Pomfrey was about to say something else, Sirius interrupted her.

“Well then... I'd best go and see what Moony and Dora are up to.” Sirius grinned as he figured this was the best time to change out of this dressing gown and into his usual clothes, they’d be folded and kept aside carefully by his bedside.

“Very well Sirius, but remember to get some rest later tonight; just because you were sleeping for two days doesn’t mean your body has healed.” If there was one thing that Poppy Pomfrey remembered all too well about Sirius, it was that he had rarely listened to her advice.

“I will make him rest.” She may not have known him for as long as anyone else, but Rose had firsthand experience of his stubbornness and while Sirius was busy taking care of her, he would forget to take care of himself; which is what she was there for.

By this point, Sirius had pulled back the curtains as he finished changing outfits, and when he poked his head around to see Rose standing by Madam Pomfrey’s side, he didn’t know whether to laugh or be proud of how mature she already sounded.

“See what you’ve done? You turned this precious girl into a Healer already.” He feigned shock as he pulled Rose back to him.

“She’s quite skilled at being a nurse, I don’t see why she shouldn’t start training from now if she wants to pursue a career as a Healer.” Madam Pomfrey said with an honest smile.

“Yes!” Rose was excited now; she’d spent most of her time here watching over Sirius and getting a chance to do all that she could to help him, she had even observed Madam Pomfrey work with various magical herbs and medicines to heal his injuries.

“Alright, we’ll talk more about this after we eat something, what say love?” Sirius knew that this was just the beginning of his fatherly concerns about Rose’s future education and eventual career; the two still had a long way to go, but he didn’t mind starting somewhere.

“Okay. I am hungry.” Hearing him not say ‘no’ to her idea of being a Healer like Madam Pomfrey one day, Rose figured it was time to focus on the present and get some food first; her stomach was on the verge of growling even as they stood there.  

“Me too. Come on, let’s take a detour to the kitchens.” Sirius held out his hand for Rose, “Thank you for everything Madam Pomfrey.” He said, with Rose waving goodbye as he led her to explore the castle.

That afternoon, Sirius and Rose spent all of their time together as they checked in on all of their friends before heading outdoors to the grounds - a visit to Hagrid’s Hut, a round of The Quidditch Pitch, a brief glimpse of the Forbidden Forest, before they finally ended up by the Great Lake. It was late evening when the two of them settled down under a great oak tree, a picnic basket in hand… something that Sirius had planned for himself and Rose. And as they sat to watch the sunset, both father and daughter knew this was only the beginning of a new chapter in their lives.


	17. Chapter 16

Freedom was a concept that Sirius had only dreamed of for years and years; never once truly believing that it would ever be possible, a reality which he would get to live. But now, by some miracle, here he was, on board the Hogwarts Express ready to go back to London where he could breathe the fresh air, feel the warm sunlight on his face, just _be_ outdoors without having to worry about anything. And as he leaned back in his seat, Sirius started to feel something he hadn’t in a very long time… a sense of peace.

“Dad, are you okay?” Rose’s soft voice spoke up, bringing Sirius out of his reverie to smile at the little girl sitting across from him… his daughter.

“Yeah, I think I am love.” He said to her, before turning his gaze towards the windows where he could see the castle almost disappearing from view now; Hogwarts had always been a home for as long as he could remember, but Sirius was starting to realize that it wasn’t so much a place as the people who made him feel that he belonged somewhere.

“You do seem lost in your thoughts, is everything alright?” Tonks asked her cousin, having observed Sirius quietly from her seat beside him.

The news of Sirius’s newfound freedom had spread throughout the castle walls within mere hours after Dumbledore’s visit to the Hospital Wing; everyone was truly happy to hear that his innocence had been proven at long last. It was the news of Sirius adopting Rose as family which he kept to himself until

they gathered in the Great Hall for one last feast with just the Order members, a few professors, Harry and his friends… all the other students having left for the summer gave them some privacy… and after toasting to him and Rose, Sirius had asked Lupin to be her Godfather and Tonks, her Godmother. Both of them accepted without hesitation and now here they were, all four of them sharing a compartment while escorting Harry, Ron, Ginny and Hermione back to London.

“I was just thinking about what comes next.” Sirius answered after a moment’s pause, holding a hand to his chest almost subconsciously, knowing the wounds were practically healed now. “What about you Dora?” He asked Tonks; the minute he had left the Hospital Wing to go and see her in the Hufflepuff Common Room, his fears were put to rest when he saw that his cousin had made a full recovery.

“I’m fine Sirius, just as I’ve been since the last time you asked me five minutes ago.” Smiling at him, Tonks felt even more better knowing how much Sirius cared for her… the fact that they had been able to find a comfortable familial relationship over the past year meant a lot.

“Good, but I’m still going to ask you again in five minutes.” Sirius said to her with a grin, before his thoughts distracted him once again; there was a lot on his mind, questions to which he didn’t have the answers to yet.

Did he have the opportunity to get a job somewhere? If so, where was he going to go? What did he want to do? How exactly was he going to re-establish himself in the Wizarding society? Would he and Rose continue to live at Grimmauld Place or perhaps find a new home together? What could he do to help Harry in his mission to defeat Voldemort?

“So do you _know_ what you want to do next?” Even though they hadn’t found a proper time to really talk about this with him, Tonks knew that Lupin was equally concerned about Sirius.

His life had changed once again and adjusting to this all by himself was no longer an option; they wanted to help him and he knew that he had their support, but when he heard Tonks asking him that question, Sirius didn’t need to think about any of those things. There was something more important to him, which demanded his immediate attention.

“Right now, I want to focus on my family first.” He replied, knowing that taking care of Rose was all he wanted to do. Nothing else mattered as long as Sirius had his entire attention centered around his daughter and raising her.

“That sounds good to me.” Tonks beamed brightly as she exchanged a quick look with Lupin; they both knew how much more happier Sirius was now, having officially adopted Rose as his own meant the world to him.

“What about plans for the summer?” Lupin asked at last. He was seated next to Rose and wondered what Sirius had thought of doing during the holidays; it was obvious to him that his best friend wasn’t about to spend another day trapped inside the house, not when he finally had the chance of going _anywhere_ he wished.

“Well… I was thinking of spending a few weeks at your place.” Sirius said to Lupin, “And then going to visit your mother, Dora.” He had indeed given it some thought, “It’s been too long since I’ve met ‘Dromeda and I want Rose to meet her.” He also wanted to spend time with Harry, which would be a little difficult but not impossible.

The idea of his Godson going back to live with Lily’s sister and her Muggle family made his skin crawl. It was necessary according to Dumbledore and Sirius may have agreed with the Headmaster, reluctantly, but he already planned on getting Harry out of there as soon as he could.

“You’re welcome to stay with me at any time Padfoot, but the next full moon is in about ten days…” The ideal situation for Lupin would be to have Sirius and Rose visit Andromeda Tonks first.

“Right, of course.” Sirius nodded as he understood the need for switching his schedule a little. “We’ll come to you afterwards then.” These discussions seemed so… mundane, but to him, it was everything to know that he had the chance of being outdoors as much as he wanted to.

“Can we go see Fred and George too?” Rose chimed in; Hermione had mentioned something to her about the Twins’ spectacle during the O.W.L.s and knew they were setting up a shop in Diagon Alley which sounded exciting.

“We most certainly can love.” He would take Rose wherever she wanted to go, “I think you’ll like Diagon Alley very much; we’ll visit them this weekend.”

“Thank you dad!” She exclaimed happily. The last time she met them was back in April on her birthday and Rose wanted to ask the twins about Fluffy the Pygmy Puff, who was currently fast asleep on her shoulder.

At that very moment, the doors to their compartment opened and they all were welcomed by the sight of the Food Trolley, or as Sirius had remembered, the Honeydukes Express. Seeing all the different varieties of sweets and snacks and chocolates, Rose jumped up from her seat, eager to examine everything that the kind-looking Witch was selling.   

“Hey Rose.” Harry said as he stepped out from the train compartment across hers, smiling first and then ruffling her hair just a little; Rose figured it was something he had learned from his Godfather.

He looked much better than he had that first night when Rose saw him; coming in to check on Sirius after meeting with Dumbledore for a few hours, she remembered how happy Harry had been to see that his Godfather was going to make it. And although most of his time went in attending school, Rose still felt very close to Harry… he was like the older brother she never had… until now. Between her new dad and two Godparents and all of her friends, she had found a family bound by love.

“Hello Harry!” Rose said, standing on her toes to see almost all of the goodies that Fred and George used to carry with them.

“You know,” Harry began to say, watching Rose stare at the food in front of them, “I would say that buying one of each is the best way to go; it’s what I did the first time I rode on the Hogwarts Express.” He said with a wink.

“What will it be then dears?” The old witch asked Harry and Rose.

“I’ll have half a dozen chocolate frogs, a packet of Droobles and two cauldron cakes.” Harry placed his order first.

“One of each please.” Rose said, repeating Harry’s words as she decided to take his advice; she may not have permission to eat _so many_ sweets, but there was no harm in sharing all of her snacks with the adults who were watching how she handled everything.

“Here, let me get this.” Lupin came to stand by Rose and took her share of the food in his hands.

“And I’ll pay for the two of them.” Sirius knew that the least he could do was to pay for Harry’s snacks as well.

A little while later after she had finished tasting whatever she could manage; a few bites here and there, Rose started to doze off. They still had several hours to go before the train reached King’s Cross Station and since it had been five days that she’d left Grimmauld Place, Rose was starting to feel the excitement as well as the exhaustion catching up with her. Swapping seats with Tonks brought her next to Sirius and without needing to say anything, she fell asleep on his lap in mere minutes. The three adults were mostly quiet and conversed in hushed whispers so as to not wake the little girl.

“You could take up a job at the school maybe?” Tonks suggested when the talks shifted to Sirius’s career.

“Defense Against the Dark Arts _is_ the obvious choice isn’t it?” Sirius grinned at the thought of becoming a Hogwarts Professor; it didn’t seem like something he had ever imagined before… but Remus had done it already… maybe he could too.

“You were ‘Outstanding’ in that subject as we all were.” Lupin said, remembering how their own respective O.W.L.s had turned out.

“That is true, but we are forgetting something.” There was a glaring point that they’d conveniently not mentioned until Sirius remembered what Harry had said to him… and what had happened with Remus.

“What?” Tonks couldn’t figure out what Sirius was referring to.

“None of the DADA teachers have lasted for more than a year; it’s been that way since… forever.” He said to them, “Look at Harry’s teachers over the past five years - Quirrell was possessed by Voldemort, Lockhart ended up in St. Mungo’s, Moony was fired…” Sirius was abruptly interrupted just then.

“I resigned.” Lupin reminded him, knowing full well where his friend was going with this topic.

“After someone let it slip that you’re a werewolf.” Sirius said pointedly, not needing to name any specific names. “Anyway, Mad-Eye was kidnapped and impersonated by a Death Eater, which leaves us with…” He trailed off, momentarily forgetting the next name.

“Dolores Umbridge from the Ministry this year.” As soon as she heard his explanation, Tonks understood the point that her cousin wanted to make. “And that did not turn out well for her either.” They had all heard what happened in the Forbidden Forest with the centaurs but after everything that woman put Harry through, there was little pity.

“Exactly.” What had sounded like a promising prospect for Sirius at first no longer seemed to be a good idea.

“Well what about becoming an Auror? Wasn’t that our original plan after we had graduated?” Lupin put forth the idea.

“Plans change Moony.” Sirius said, his tone a little grim now; there was no way he would ever consider the possibility of working for the Ministry.

“True, but you’ve been given a second chance.” The other wizard pointed out. Lupin knew that he would never get the opportunity to do anything else in his life, but considering the year he’d spent at Hogwarts, he was content with having been a professor.

“I don’t think I want to work for the same people who took away my first chance.” Sirius countered with the one argument which would end this discussion once and for all.

“You have a point there and I wouldn’t suggest it if…” Lupin said before trailing off, turning towards Tonks.

“If what Remus?” The sudden prompt attention that his best friend gave Tonks was not lost on Sirius, but he had no idea where this conversation was going.

“Surely you must have heard the rumors Tonks?” Lupin asked, not realizing that he was gazing at her.

“Oh… well… yes.” Having been silently listening to the two men discussing this back and forth, Tonks finally spoke up, feeling a blush creeping up her cheeks; which may not be too noticeable she hoped.

“What are you two on about?” Sirius said with a frown. He’d have thought that even though he wasn’t actively involved in what the Aurors discussed about the going ons at their workplace, being a part of the Order would surely have given him a clue.

“There are rumors in the Ministry that Cornelius Fudge is going to be replaced as Minister… and very soon.” As if suddenly struck by the fact of still looking at Tonks, Lupin suddenly snapped his head back to Sirius and explained what the latest news was.

“Huh, who knew?” When he heard those words, Sirius understood that something must have happened in the immediate aftermath of the attack in the Department of Mysteries.

If there was one thing that they all could agree on without the need to voice it out loud, it was the fact that whatever happened in the Ministry would have spread like wildfire throughout the entire Wizarding community; that in turn would lead to mass panic amongst the public, unless of course, there would be some big declaration of Cornelius Fudge ‘taking’ the responsibility and ‘voluntarily’ resigning. At least this would be more or less the chain of events which would soon be taking place over the next several weeks.

“Kingsley and Mad-Eye were discussing something of the sort when they returned yesterday. I heard the name Scrimgeour.” Tonks added, showing that she didn’t know much about this either.

“Who is he?” Sirius was curious now, this was a name he didn’t recognize, but needed to know about if there was to be a new Minister for Magic; he also wondered if this meant that the investigation into his innocence would be handled by this… Scrimgeour.

“Rufus Scrimgeour, Auror. Definitely seems to be qualified for the job.” Lupin said, “I mean, it’s not like he can do any worse than Fudge already has; he could possibly deal with the situation instead of just _handling_ it and trying to make the whole thing go away.”

“Do we know where his loyalties lie? Does he trust Dumbledore? And are we sure that he isn’t going to spend another year trying to put off the fact that Voldemort is alive and has returned?” These were just some of the thoughts which Sirius voiced out loud, whatever happened with his case, he wasn’t worried.

“I guess we’ll find out when we have our next Order meeting maybe.” Tonks said with a shrug, things were still in the early stages and they were all pretty much clueless until Kingsley could update them.

“I’ll think about it. If these are the only two options I have, then I could always just take on the persona of… Stubby Boardman the Rockstar or something.” Sirius cracked a smile at last, feeling the need to lighten the mood around them now; he had been fortunate enough to come across the Quibbler articles.

The comment of his was enough to elicit a laugh from both Lupin and Tonks who knew all too well that this was Sirius’s attempt to change topics to something much more pleasurable.

“Can you play a guitar?” Intrigued by the possibility of her cousin turning to music, Tonks asked him in all seriousness.

“I can.” Sirius answered her with his trademark smirk, “And not only that, I’m also very good with a pianoforte too. Marlene and Lily both made me take lessons over the summer holidays from our Fifth Year onwards.” He could remember those days vividly; but the happy memories simply made him smile now.

“ _Really_?” Tonks couldn’t believe the image forming in her mind; Sirius seated in front of a piano and playing all the greatest hits.

“He really can.” Lupin said, vouching for his best friend. “I’ve heard him play… at James and Lily’s wedding reception.” There was a hint of sadness that Tonks noticed, but it disappeared almost instantly as he chose to smile and focus on the happy aspects.    

“Will you play something for me?” She asked Sirius, wondering why she hadn’t heard her mother mention anything about this to her in all the stories that Andromeda had shared throughout the years.

“Do you have to ask Dora?” He said to Tonks, “I’ll just need some help finding the big damn family piano which is probably gathering dust up in the attic.”

“Remus and I can help.” Tonks answered without thinking twice about what she had said and just smiled at the two men.

Sirius exchanged an amused look with Lupin who didn’t know what else to say except to agree with Tonks’ proposition, “Of course.” Was all he managed; and that was the end of their conversations for the afternoon.

The sun was starting to set when Rose awoke and saw that the Hogwarts Express had reached its final leg of the journey; London was fast approaching, they would soon be back home at Grimmauld Place. Sitting up from Sirius’s lap, she first noticed that Tonks and Lupin were both fast asleep on the seats across from her. To be sure that her eyes weren’t playing tricks, Rose blinked twice and saw, to her immense delight, that at some point Tonks had rested her head on Lupin’s shoulder and his head rested atop hers.

“Its at times like this that I wish we had a camera.” Sirius whispered to Rose softly, a big smile playing on his lips.

“Is there a magic spell we can use?” Rose didn’t quite know what a camera was, but she did know that Sirius wanted to capture this moment between two friends.

“Nah, I don’t think so… but I do have the next best thing.” He said, remembering something from a previous talk with his cousin, and pulled out a camera from Tonks’ bag which lay open on the floor between them.

Within seconds, Sirius managed to get a picture of Lupin and Tonks, surprisingly without waking either of them up. Rose remained as quiet as possible but beamed brightly at the sight of the two; they reminded her a lot about her own parents and hoped that someday they would realize what everyone else around could see clearly.

“When do we wake them?” Rose asked her father, only now sensing that in the second compartment, Harry and the others were asleep as well.

“Soon… there’s still a half hour until we reach King’s Cross.” Sirius figured it was alright to leave everyone sleeping for the moment.

“Okay.” She said with a nod and leaned back in her seat, watching the buildings zoom past.

For several minutes, she sat in a peaceful silence as she stared out the window, taking in the beautiful scenery. It was only when Rose saw that Sirius had fallen quiet and lost in his thoughts once more did she reach out to touch his arm.

“Dad?” Rose could tell that there was something on his mind, something more than what she remembered hearing while she had been asleep.

“Yes love?” Sirius met her gaze which revealed nothing, but Rose knew that all she had to do was ask.

“You look sad. What’s wrong?” She moved her hand from his arm and to his cheek.

“It’s nothing…” He said to her with a deep breath, and then went on, “I’ve just been remembering… there’s something that I have to do.” In all honesty, Sirius had not stopped thinking about this from the moment he had been given his freedom; he just hadn’t mentioned it to anyone yet.

“Now?” Rose asked him, curious as to what seemed to be so important to her father as it was reflected in his eyes, that hint of sadness which hadn’t completely disappeared.

“No… I’ll be going somewhere soon… and I want to ask you to come with me.” Sirius explained to her; he would tell Rose about the details eventually.

“Yes, I will.” Rose answered without hesitation, wherever they had to go, she knew that they would go together.

Sirius smiled at Rose’s quick response; he knew that there really was no need to wait, but a part of him believed that waiting for the right time was the best thing to do. And so, sitting beside his daughter, holding her hand, he began to prepare himself for what lay ahead, knowing he would not be alone.


	18. Chapter 17

Fifteen years. It had been fifteen years since Sirius had set foot inside the village of Godric’s Hollow; and even now as he stood there in the lane, holding onto Rose’s hand, Sirius felt his footsteps getting heavier, he wasn’t sure if he could do this. There was too much pain, after all these years, he could still feel the rawness within as nostalgia came crashing down in hundreds if not thousands of memories - he had spent the last two years of Hogwarts while staying here with James and his parents; this was the one place where Sirius had felt at home when he wasn’t at school. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and tried to calm himself… compose his thoughts… keep it together.

“Dad? Are you alright?” Rose suddenly asked. She had not let go of his hand since they’d apparated here together; she remembered how Sirius had been a year ago on this very day and wondered what would happen today.

“I will be love.” Sirius turned to look at his daughter, and smiled for the first time since that morning. He was glad that he wasn’t about to do this alone and having Rose by his side gave him the courage to walk on ahead.

The two of them passed several cottages, it was mid-afternoon and yet the village seemed quiet all around. There were very few people out on the streets, those who saw Sirius and Rose paid no heed, going about their own way. There were decorations everywhere they turned - jack o’lanterns nestled on front porches, paper bats strung over fences, cauldron’s filled with green liquid for apple bobbing - Halloween looked just as typical as it did back at Grimmauld Place. Sirius wasn’t interested in all that, his focus was solely centered on the town square, which is when he finally stopped walking.

“What?” Rose, who had been turning her head in all directions as she took in the sights, almost bumped into him, but her voice was so soft that Sirius didn’t seem to have heard her.

She did not know why he had suddenly paused, this did not seem like the place they were headed to. Peeking around his waist, Rose glanced up and saw that there was… a statue… of three people. And Sirius was staring at it in wonder. It was clear to her what this meant to him. When she looked at the statue closer, she could make out that there was a man who had messy hair and wore glasses, next to him was a lady with long hair and a kind face, and sitting on her lap was a tiny baby boy. Harry and his parents.

“Oh…” This was something she had briefly heard Remus mention to Sirius the last time they’d met, but for Rose, seeing the memorial face to face made her realize how very real this was for her father whom she knew had not been here until now.

For his part, Sirius had managed to crack a sad smile when he noticed the statue; it was a very good likeness of his friends and godson. He thought that this was a fitting tribute to the Potter family but chose not to say anything… there were still people lingering about… by the post office, outside the pub. He didn’t want to draw more attention to himself and Rose. Today wasn’t about him.

“C’mon love. Let’s go.” He finally said, tugging on Rose’s hand as he turned away from the memorial; his heart was racing now, more from fear than excitement when he saw the church and beyond it, the cemetery.

“Okay.” Rose said to him, she knew that Sirius was trying not to think too much about the past, but also didn’t know why he had brought her along and not Remus; this was something she thought he would have done alone if not with his best friend.

At first, it seemed as if they were heading directly for the cemetery, but before the two of them could even cross over to the path, Sirius spun around without a second’s thought and headed in the opposite direction; either he had remembered something else or his mind was working on its own accord, but Rose didn’t say anything as she stayed by his side. They passed the memorial and went on ahead, reaching the street where all the houses were lined up beyond the town square, where it was silent. And deserted.

“It’s here.” Sirius spoke out loud, but not so much to Rose as to himself when he recognized where his feet had led him; the cemetery was merely one of the places he meant to visit.

He was looking toward the dark mass that stood at the very end of this row of houses; he could see it and knew the Fidelius Charm had broken that night… the hedge had grown wild in the fourteen years since the night he had given Harry to Hagrid, leading them away from the rubble that lay scattered among the waist-high grass. Most of the cottage was still standing, though entirely covered in dark ivy, but the right side of the top floor had been blown apart, where he had been… inside… finding… no. He couldn’t think about that night… not now… but Sirius already started to feel the thoughts and images crashing through his mind, threatening to burst out on the surface.

“This is Harry’s house.” Rose stated as she stood on her toes, peering over the gate to see what lay behind.

“Yeah, this is it.” His voice sounded hoarse already, but Sirius was focused on pushing away the pain; flashes of that night… the darkness, the silence, the fear which had gripped his heart tight. “What’s left of it anyway.” He added, noticing that most of the house was still standing.

“Dad! Look!” Stepping backwards a little, Rose pointed to the gate which suddenly… moved… as soon as he had grasped it with both his hands.

Sirius’s touch on the gate had caused a sign to rise up out of the ground in front of them both, up through the tangles of nettles and weeds, like some bizarre fast-growing flower and in golden letters upon the wood it said:

 

_“On this spot, on the night of 31 October 1981,_

_Lily and James Potter lost their lives._

_Their son, Harry, remains the only wizard_

_ever to have survived the Killing Curse._

  
_This house, invisible to Muggles, has been left_

_in its ruined state as a monument to the Potters_

_and as a reminder of the violence_

_that tore apart their family.”_

Sirius read the words aloud, softly and felt… his heart sink… and ache… and sting… and realized that his own Godson hadn’t even been here in all the years; perhaps he would when the time was right for him. All around those neatly lettered words, scribbles had been added by other witches and wizards who had come to see the place where the Boy Who Lived had escaped. Some had merely signed their names in Everlasting Ink; others had carved their initials into the wood, still others had left messages. Taking a deep breath, and knowing Rose was holding his hand, he knew that it was time to step away.

“We should head back to the church.” Was all Sirius said to his daughter, not daring to close his eyes even for a second.

They walked towards the cemetery in silence. Rose was busy observing Sirius quietly, as he tried very hard not to recall his time spent here in Godric’s Hollow; but the memories of his time even after leaving Hogwarts kept pushing their way to the surface - when he would visit James and Lily at the house and stay for days without complaint, playing with Harry, laughing at James’s jokes and always complimenting Lily’s cooking skills, the long naps he would take on their couch with Harry who was no more than a few months old, the family dinners with Remus joining them, spending the weekends outdoors teaching Harry how to fly, seeing James and Lily so in love, their little family that had welcomed him with open arms. And how all of the dreams they each held onto were suddenly shattered that Halloween night - Sirius could still remember it as clearly as if was only yesterday; the nightmare which haunted him all along… racing to the house as soon as he could, the dread filling his heart and chilling his bones… knowing that he was too late the moment he set foot inside.

“Dad?” Rose reached out to touch his arm just then. She had seen him gripping the wall that ran alongside the entire length of the church and knew he was still hurting.

Sirius let go of the wooden rails and staggered away, taking deep breaths. He wasn’t even near the cemetery yet, but there was no going back now. Not when he finally had a chance to… be here… and see it with his own eyes.

“I’m okay Rose… I will be…” Sirius heard his own voice and knew that it was a lie; he had been living with the guilt of his best friend’s death for so long now, even though he was innocent of all those horrible crimes he had been accused of, he never stopped wondering how things might have turned out if he had just…

“Do you want to…” Unsure of what she really wanted to ask him, whether it was to keep going forward or turn around and go home, Rose faltered for a second; in her few short years, she had already been exposed to more sadness than was normal, especially since she was only 5 and a half now, but she was strong. She had to be, for herself and her father. Today of all days.

“We keep going.” Pushing away all his memories as far back as he could, Sirius clenched his fists together and continued to make his way towards the church.

Rose merely nodded and followed him; though it was the last day of October, the weather here seemed pleasant enough... not too cold and snowy yet nor warm and bright.... there was an odd gloom, but the sun was still out. She wasn't worried about a chance of rain, no... Rose's only concern was her father. A part of her did feel slightly nervous to be entering a cemetery; she had visited her own parents’ graves on the first anniversary of the accident two months ago, as well as her aunt Marlene’s, but Ottery St. Catchpole had been a more… cheerful place… than this part of Godric’s Hollow appeared to be.

When they finally passed through the church, neither one of them noticing any surroundings, Sirius and Rose walked on until they came to a kissing gate. Beyond that lay the graveyard... and this time, without any hesitation, Sirius pushed it open as he finally set foot inside. The sun had not yet set, it’s soft rays casting light upon several gravestones… neither one knew where they were meant to be and once Rose saw her father carefully looking around, checking names, she figured there was no harm in trying to help out.

“Abbott… Peverell… Dumbledore?” Sirius read the names of a few familiar Wizarding families that he passed, before stopping in front of a dark stone one and saw ‘ _Kendra Dumbledore… and Her Daughter Ariana’_ written below the dates with an inscription etched underneath.

“Dad? I… I think I found them…” Rose suddenly called out, not giving a chance for Sirius to fully process the fact that Dumbledore’s family was buried here, at Godric’s Hollow as well.

And all of a sudden, Sirius froze up; there was something in Rose’s voice which made him believe that she had already found them. Within mere minutes of having arrived there. Turning around, he saw that she was standing two rows behind Kendra and Ariana’s graves, a white marble headstone that glistened in the sunlight. For a very long second, everything around him seemed to slow down. The next thing that Sirius knew, he felt his feet moving in that direction but in his mind, there were dozens of thoughts spinning around… that fear which he hadn’t felt in a long time was resurfacing again, a heavy weight which constricted his heart and lungs, making it harder to breathe. The closer he got, Rose could see the look on his face and took a step back, giving him some space. When he finally reached where she stood, Sirius closed his eyes for a brief second before facing the place he had been searching for. There was enough sunlight for him to see the words that were engraved upon the marble -

 

**JAMES POTTER                          LILY POTTER**

**BORN 27 MARCH 1960          BORN 30 JANUARY 1960**

**DIED 31 OCTOBER 1981       DIED 31 OCTOBER 1981**

 

      _The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death._

He mouthed the words written and that was when he realized, the shock of it all was beginning to hit him now. After all these years. Sirius wasn’t aware of his lip quivering or his knees starting to tremble; almost as if he was in a trance, he slowly sank down to the ground on his knees and hung his head, letting out a shuddering sigh.

“James. Lily.” Rose, who had been staring at her father in shock, having never seen him like this before, heard the sadness and pain in his voice when he finally spoke. “I… I’m so sorry.” He whispered softly, one hand half-raised as if to trace the names of his friends, but stopped mere inches away.

There was a time when Sirius never believed that he would get this chance… to be able to actually come back to Godric’s Hollow… to James and Lily, but he owed them that much. They were always going to be the closest family he ever had in his life. And kneeling before their graves now, Sirius finally let go of all the feelings and thoughts and fears and pain and sadness as he broke down crying; for the first time in fifteen years since that Halloween night in 1981, Sirius Black cried and cried, letting the sobs wrack his body as the grief was released at last. There was so much that he wanted to say, so much that he had to apologize for, so much guilt that he had carried since then, but in that moment, nothing else mattered. He let the tears fall down his cheeks, knowing his throat was tightening and the knuckles of his hands turning white, clenched into fists on the dirt.

All the while, Rose held a hand over her mouth, tears in her eyes as she watched her dad silently, wishing that there was something she could do for him, she had never truly known just how much pain he had been until now. Before she thought about what she was going to do, Rose ran over to Sirius and as soon as she touched his shoulder, he briefly seemed to realize that he wasn’t alone when she stood in front of him; the next thing she knew, Sirius had his arms around her waist, his head against her stomach as he shuddered through the last of his tears. Rose simply hugged him close as she caressed his hair and sighed to herself. This was enough. For a few more minutes, both father and daughter stayed the way they were… until… Sirius felt something soft touching his face. At first he thought that it had started to rain, but there was no water droplets, there was only a… flower petal?

“Rose?” Sirius’s voice was a bit hoarse as he blinked the last of his tears away, now more aware of her presence.

He didn’t get a chance to say anything else, for when his eyes fell on the graves once more, Sirius saw dozens of tiny pink petals laying there. It was raining flowers… just barely… and when he pulled back just enough to look at his daughter, he saw that she looked surprised at what her magic had caused this time around.

“I… I don’t know how…” She started to say, as usual her magic seemed to have a mind of its own but even though she was feeling her father’s sadness, the rose petals were a happy thing.

“It’s okay… come here love.” Smiling through his tears, Sirius gently pulled her down to sit on his lap then, “Thank you.” He said, kissing the top of her head… the pain was starting to recede now.

The gesture had been accidental but beautiful and touching. Sirius had forgotten to bring flowers, but he did have his wand, and with a wordless flick, he conjured up a wreath of white lilies to rest atop the roses. The two of them sat there quietly, with Rose leaning against his chest as he tried to sort through his thoughts.

“Prongs, Lils… I’d like to you meet my daughter, Marlene Rose Black.” When Sirius spoke once more, he knew that despite all the other things he had to say to them, about how he had let them down by removing himself as their Secret Keeper that night, about how he wished he could have taken it all back in an instant if there was a chance to change events… he chose to focus on the fact that both his friends would have wanted him to be happy, more than anything. And he was, ever since Rose had come into his life.

“She saved me, when I was down and at my lowest point. She gave me a reason to live again, to smile, to laugh…” Sirius knew that Rose was listening to his words, as he continued talking, “I never thought I would ever be a father, you knew that didn’t you Lils?” He could remember those memories as clearly as it were only yesterday when he was named Harry’s Godfather and spent the first year of that baby’s life taking care of him as much as his parents did, but always joking that settling down with a family of his own was a fairytale, a fantasy, a dream, nothing more. “And yet you always told me that someday, maybe I would… you said that I would be a great dad when I have a kid of my own, and I promise you… and James, that I will always love my daughter and be there by her side forever; but I won't stop protecting Harry either.” He glanced down and saw Rose turn around as she met his gaze and hugged him.

This time, when she looked into his eyes, the sadness that had always been prevalent seemed to be fading away as something else replaced it… something Rose would have guessed as… peace. There was no need to ask him anything, she knew how he felt and also believed with all her heart that he really would be okay soon.

“I love you Dad.” Was all that was needed to be said as she rested her head against his chest.

“I love you Rose.” Sirius said to her with a smile, and sighed deeply... there was a lightness within him now, as if that weight had been lifted and dissipated. He knew that the sadness wouldn’t completely go away, but with time, his scars would heal and his memories would make him laugh and his stories would be filled with joyful nostalgia.

The sun was starting to set when Sirius realized that he and Rose were going to be late for their own Halloween party. After everything that happened over the summer, though the dangers were still prominent and strong as ever, with his newfound freedom, he had decided to take the opportunity, this second chance and grab it in order to live life to the fullest extent; starting with a simple celebration of the holiday season at home with Rose. She was almost dozing off to sleep on his shoulder, and so when he stood up, holding her in his arms, Sirius carefully made sure that he didn’t disturb her while they headed back. And just as he laid a hand on the marble headstone, saying a silent goodbye to his friends, there was a… a moment when he glanced up… for a split second, he swore that he could see… standing by the roadside, where the kissing gate was, a young couple holding hands… the man who had messy black hair, round glasses and a big smile on his face, and the woman, with flaming red hair, bright green eyes who met his gaze. In a blink of an eye, they had vanished… but those gentle, kind smiles which were for him… which spoke a thousand words… told Sirius everything… he knew now that all was forgiven.  


	19. Chapter 18 - Epilogue

*** ~ SIX YEARS LATER ~ ***

"Come on Dad! We're gonna be late!" Rose exclaimed in a hyper voice as she dragged Sirius through the crowds that had gathered at King's Cross Station, they were already walking past Platform 7 in a haste.

"Slow down Rose, your old man isn't that young any more." Sirius was pushing the trolley loaded up with suitcases and a cage in which sat a surprisingly calm tawny owl.

"You don't look a day over 30; now let's go!" Her excitement was contagious and soon Sirius found himself chuckling as they made their way towards Platform 9.

"There's still time before the train leaves." He said to her, checking the watch she'd gifted him a few months ago; Sirius still had a habit of losing his timepieces, but had promised himself not to lose Rose's present.

"Yes I know that, but I  _don't_  want to end up getting trapped by a magical barrier and trying to find a flying car to reach school on my first day!" Rose dropped her voice to a soft whisper as she slowed down to walk beside Sirius.

"Well love, that happened to Harry only once and it was in his second year." Unable to help himself from grinning, Sirius wasn't sure if he felt relieved that there was a little adventurous streak in his daughter or worried about it.

"You're not helping Dad." Sighing to herself, Rose squared her shoulders once they reached their destination, the barrier between platforms 9 and 10, ready to make her way to Platform 9 ¾.

"Okay…  _if_  something were to happen and you need a flying car, I'm driving." Sirius grinned as he took hold of Rose's hand, giving it a tight squeeze to let her know that he wasn't going anywhere.

This was something that Rose wanted to do for herself. Despite her fears, she had been to Hogwarts more times than anyone else her age; taking the Hogwarts Express was a first from this side of the station and she'd decided to take that first step through the barrier that separated London from the magical world on her own. Taking a deep breath, Rose gripped the handles of her baggage cart and broke into a light sprint, not paying attention to anything else around her. Sirius had told her to just let go and run into the wall, which is exactly what she did. Surely enough, a few seconds later, Rose felt that she had passed through and was on the other side.

"I did it." Rose said aloud as she stopped in her tracks and stared at the sight in front of her eyes; the familiar scarlet train looking majestic in all its glory, steam puffing through the crowds of people that had already gathered there.

"Did you ever doubt that?" Her father's voice suddenly spoke up as Sirius materialized next to her, a big smile on his face.

"No… but I've been used to apparating even before knowing how to do it myself." She admitted, only now realizing how much she had experienced in her life for so many years, that she hoped there was still things which would take her breath away.

"Don't worry," Sirius said as he could read her thoughts, "Once you get to Hogwarts, it is going to be a whole new kind of fun for you. Just remember to be careful okay?" He realized what other parents were probably feeling all around them, "Whatever tricks you get up to, save the crazier antics for later."

They were standing under the giant clock which showed that the time was already 10:30, plenty of time for Rose to get a chance to say goodbye to Sirius and find a compartment before it got too late. And though the two of them could sense some of the other people gathered there talking in hushed whispers as Sirius was recognized, neither one paid much attention.

"Sorry to disappoint you dad, but I really don't have any tricks or antics in mind." Rose had always found herself being a stickler for rules, which was a little surprising since she'd grown up with a Marauder for a father, another for a Godfather, Tonks who was her Godmother and Harry who definitely had had his share of adventures all throughout his school years.

"Never say never love, you don't know what you may find when you finally get to Hogwarts." There was a glint of… mischief in Sirius's eyes that Rose could clearly see as he turned to her. "And once you have a group of friends... then anything is possible." He was talking in code which meant that he was up to something or the other.

"Well I'll be sure to tell you all about it when I'm home for Christmas." She figured that whatever Sirius was planning, he might mention something to her in a letter.

"You're ready to leave your old man behind aren't you love?" Sirius's eyes suddenly changed when he saw the excitement reflected in his daughter's; he knew it was selfish to feel this way, being dependent on her was something he hadn't done for years now, and even though he was a new Sirius Black now, he still would miss her terribly.

"I can only come back once I leave right?" Rose knew in her heart that she would miss him just as much, but now that the War was over and they were all rebuilding their lives, it was time to let go of the past and look to a new future.

"Did you just quote your Uncle Moony?" Feigning shock as he dramatically clutched his heart at the sudden betrayal by his own daughter, Sirius managed to make Rose laugh as she playfully swatted his arm.

"What? No… I thought of that one all on my own, dad!" Shaking her head after giggling at his attempt at a joke, Rose realized that this was his way of lightening the mood between them.

"Sure you did." The tone in his voice wasn't sarcastic at all but Sirius still teased her for a little while longer.

"Are you going to be okay without me?" Rose asked softly, knowing that they hadn't really talked about this in the days leading up to today.

The Second War had ended four years ago and though she was only eleven, Rose was well aware that despite Harry's victory over the Dark Lord and Sirius coming back to her, there had been losses as well; friends and family alike. The people who were no longer with them lived on in their memories... but sometimes, even now... even after all this time, there were nights when Rose would go to her old room where Sirius slept and fall asleep by his side to chase away the nightmares. He had given her Regulus's bedroom as her own when she'd turned 10, after learning the truth about his brother and the brave sacrifice he had made for their cause, Sirius had found a way to let go and move on, but it was only when he sensed Rose's calming presence in the midst of his dark dreams would he truly believe that things were going to be okay.

"Yes, don't worry about me… I've got a busy work schedule to look forward to." Sirius answered her honestly after a moment.

Working as an Auror under Kingsley as Minister had been a good change for him; it had also helped to know that he was doing something to aid in the aftermath of the War, to make a difference in the Wizarding community. "Remus and Dora are visiting this weekend with Teddy so that is something to look forward to." He added before Rose could say anything else.

"How is Teddy feeling now?" Both father and daughter knew that if the Lupin family could have made it today they would have been there, but because little Teddy Lupin had fallen ill, they had canceled this morning.

"Better, Dora said it was just a cold… no need to worry." He had been named Godfather to the child and loved the boy with all his heart, "And Harry was swamped with work so I told him not to feel bad about not being here." Sirius said to Rose.

"That's okay, tell him I said it's fine that he couldn't make it." Rose understood just how busy everyone was and didn't mind at all; a part of her was glad to have just Sirius by her side.

The first whistle of the train suddenly rang out loudly across the station as students hurried to board; everything was in a flurry of activity, and yet, Rose and Sirius still stood there. This was the first time in seven years that they would be separated for such a long time and neither one really knew how to say goodbye. It was only when Rose's owl suddenly screeched, having woken up by the bells and flapping around in his cage that broke the silence between them.

"You never told me what you named him." Sirius suddenly asked, gesturing to her pet.

"I… well… I couldn't really settle on something new, so I went with an old name… something important to me..." Rose blushed a little as she shuffled her feet just then; she never kept secrets from her father.

"And what's that?" His curiosity peaked now, Sirius waited for her to say something.

"Snuffles." Was all Rose said, finally looking up to meet his gaze and see what his reaction would be.

There were very few things in life that could surprise Sirius Black after everything he'd been through, but just then, hearing his daughter's words, he realized that  _she_  would always be the one person who managed to do so; and as usual, in that moment, there was no need for anything else to be said between them.

"I think it suits him." Sirius said at last, a soft smile playing on his lips.

"Me too." Rose added, glad to know that he didn't mind the name at all. After hearing suggestions from everyone else, she settled on what had always been her first choice.

"It's almost time." He pointed out, the clock hanging above them still ticking closer to eleven o'clock.

"I know." She was well aware of the fact that only a little time ago, her eagerness to reach the station knew no bounds, and now all she could feel was her heavy heart.

"Rose…" Sirius started to say, his tone turning fatherly once again.

" _Dad_." Rose countered, even though she didn't mean to; now that they were here, she wasn't sure how she was going to leave him until December.

Sirius sighed as he ran a hand through his hair; it was still as long as it had been, that aspect of him hadn't changed over the years. He knew that Rose wasn't going to leave unless he was the one to tell her that it was okay, that he would be fine without her. Three months. That's all it was and then she would be home again for the holidays.

"There's something I wanted to give you before you left." He had a gift for her, one that he hoped would not only help her enjoy herself a little, but also be a keepsake of sorts.

"What is it?" Rose was curious now, she hadn't seen anything that resembled a present all morning that she'd spent with him and wondered what it could be.

"Let's just say, it's an inheritance… something once that belonged to me, which was passed down to Harry when he was at school." Sirius glanced around to check if anyone was watching them, "I figured it was time for you to have this now since we don't need it anymore." He said to her and removed something from his robes.

"Oh… oh!" As realization struck, Rose felt Sirius passing the gift into her hands and gave her a knowing wink.

"Use it wisely." That was all the advice he needed to give his daughter as he kissed her forehead, "Now go, and make me proud love." Sirius hugged Rose one last time before giving her a nudge towards the train.

"Thanks a lot Dad." Rose beamed as she hugged him back and kissed his cheek, knowing that this was what she needed; something to remember him by while at school.

By now the Hogwarts Express had blown its last and final whistle which meant that Rose had to hurry; gathering her things, she ran towards the first carriage that came in sight and jumped on board, before turning around to wave goodbye to Sirius. He stood there on the platform, along with all the other families who were gathered there, as they all bid farewell to their children. He waved back to her and stayed there until the very last minute before turning back and heading home.

"Bye dad." Rose whispered, before turning away from the steps.

The train set off on its journey and Rose was left to her own devices as she made her way through the corridors, searching for a compartment. She felt less nervous and worried now which was funny since she'd thought the fear would stay with her long after Sirius had left; but she knew that they would stay in touch through owl post and even the two-sided mirror that Harry had gifted her this past birthday helped, and that was going to be enough. Once Rose had found an empty compartment all to herself, she put away her luggage and sat Snuffles down on the table by the window. There were snippets of conversations from other nearby compartments, but for the most part, she was alone and that gave her a chance to take a proper look at Sirius's gift before she would put it away for safekeeping. Rose already knew exactly what this was, not only had she seen it many times over the years but she had also heard all of the stories that were part of Sirius and Harry's respective lives. Knowing that her father had entrusted her with something so important and so special, Rose promised that she would do her best to make use of it… at least once.

Opening the parchment up, she saw the words written across; Sirius had left it enchanted before giving it to her, which meant that she would have to use a little magic to make sure that no one else would see the message -  _"Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs, Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief-Makers are proud to present The Marauder's Map."_

Before she could take a peek inside, Rose heard a chatter of voices getting closer to her compartment. Studying the map would have to wait, she was known for being careful if nothing else and quickly slid her wand out from underneath her robes before anyone else arrived. This was definitely something worth bending the rules a little while in her first year of school. It seemed that Sirius would end up hearing a lot of stories about her own adventures by the time she returned home in December; but first she decided to enjoy the train ride. This was after all, the scenic route to Hogwarts that she was getting to experience all on her own!

Tapping her wand on the parchment, Rose cast her first spell of the year as she whispered the words to make the contents of the map disappear, before settling down for the ride. "Mischief Managed."

THE END!


End file.
